REVIEW: Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Bag

I don’t believe I put forth a good showing in my Mystery Flavor Twizzlers review.

I tried to solve that flavor conundrum to no avail for days, and it left me a broken man.

I vowed to leave the snack detective game, never to return! I retired my houndstooth hat, my magnifying glass, and wait… Sour Patch Kids has a new mystery flavor?!

Just when I thought I was out, they pulled me back in!

Ok so, unlike the typical bright and vibrant Sour Patch Kids, these mystery pieces are all white. I tried my best not to let that somehow influence my guess.

As we all know, Sour Patch Kids are sour before they’re sweet. These took extra long to get to the latter. The typical sour sugar punch felt especially pronounced this time around.

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Bowl

Once the sour crystals melted away, I was left with a shockingly mild sweetness. I was instantly stumped and starting to regret my decision to return to the mystery game. I don’t really know how to describe the flavor other than “confectionary.” I know that’s a broad description, but it tasted more in line with a flavor you’d get in a pastry than the usual fruity Sour Patch fare.

My initial instinct was mild coconut, but then realized I broke my rule and let the color influence my guess, so I settled on… banana, which is also white. Maybe the color actually is a hint?

The flavor isn’t strong at all. It’s tasty, but it’s far and away the weakest Sour Patch flavor I’ve ever had. I think I might be right with banana, but if you wanted to tell me there might be something like vanilla, or marshmallow, or the aforementioned coconut, I’d believe it. Pina Colada? Maybe? Some kind of multi-ingredient dessert concoction? That seems more like a Jelly Belly thing than Sour Patch, no?

Unlike Twizzlers, these Sour Patch Kids came with clues on the bag. My bag had one, and I was able to snap a pic of a different hint as well.

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Clues

“It gives laughs and can be a riot, cause when it flies nobody’s silent.”

“Across the pond it has a different name, but there’s an extra ingredient in the game.”

Putting aside the fact these hints stink, I landed on Banana Cream Pie.

I would say the first hint means some clown is hilariously throwing a pie, and while this is happening, everyone else is making a ruckus and laughing up a storm.

The second hint makes a little more sense. In the UK, a banana cream pie is called “Dame Madeline’s Stupendous Yellow and White,” and as we all know, the extra ingredient is baked beans. It’s an acquired taste, but is it the flavor of these Mystery Kids?

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Alone

Ya know what? I’m stumped again. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this snack detective game. Don’t hire me to find your lost donut.

I’m saying it’s probably banana, maybe banana cream pie, and I’m also saying that despite being hard to decipher and pretty weak, they taste just fine. I’m gonna be super bummed if these are just another in the long line of “birthday cake” flavored snacks. Am I overlooking the Kids’ birthday?

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Mix

You can buy Mystery bags or regular Sour Patch Kid bags with some mystery flavored pieces mixed in, but be warned, the OG flavors will dwarf the mystery flavor.

You can submit your guess on their website, but if you somehow win with “Dame Madeline’s Stupendous Yellow and White,” you owe me a cut of that $50k prize. I want at least $3! I accept Venmo, Paypal, and whatever crypto is hot at that precise moment.

Best of luck with your guesses!

Purchased Price: $2.89
Size: 8 oz.
Purchased at: 7-11
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (12 pieces) 110 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 15 milligrams of sodium, 27 grams of total carbohydrates, 23 grams of sugars, 0 grams of fiber, 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Crush Sour Patch Kids Berry Soda

Crush Sour Patch Kids Berry Soda

What is Crush Sour Patch Kids Berry Soda?

It’s a blue raspberry-flavored and Blue 1-dyed soda with a sour twist that’s brought to you by our friends at Dr Pepper/Seven Up, Inc. and Mondelez International. Also, like all Crush sodas, it’s caffeine free.

How is it?

It has that familiar, sweet blue raspberry aroma. But if I jam my nose into the bottle’s spout and take a good sniff, I smell a hint of something that could be considered tropical. Maybe that’s from the sour ingredients. Or possibly my nose got damaged from jamming it into a bottle’s spout. But, as a whole, it smells wonderful and enticing.

But I’m hesitant to use those same adjectives to describe the soda’s flavor.

Look, it sounds like I’m about to type that I hate this Cool Water cologne bottle-colored soda, but after drinking half of it, I find it to be decent tasting. However, I’m not craving for another bottle.

The blue raspberry flavor is super sweet, and perhaps too sweet for my taste buds. Its sourness level is noticeable, but it isn’t high enough to make me pucker even a little after each sip. But it does make me want to drink this slower than other soft drinks. Also, just like when I took a good sniff from its spout, I noticed something that registers as “tropical” in the aftertaste.

Anything else you need to know?

This isn’t the first Sour Patch Kids soda. 7-Eleven and Jones Soda Company partnered to come out with the Sour Patch Kids Watermelon Soda back in 2016. It’s also not the first collaboration between Crush and Sour Patch Kids. Earlier this year, the two offered Crush-flavored candy.

Also, is this the season for blue raspberry beverages?

Conclusion:

Crush Sour Patch Kids Berry is a novelty soda, and like most novelty foods, it’s worth a try at least once.

Purchased Price: More than anyone should pay on eBay
Size: 20 fl oz bottle
Purchased at: eBay
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 bottle) 290 calories, 0 grams of fat, 105 milligrams of sodium, 75 grams of carbohydrates, 74 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Chips Ahoy Sour Patch Kids Cookies

Limited Edition Chips Ahoy Sour Patch Kids Cookies

Thankfully, the candy pieces in Limited Edition Chips Ahoy Sour Patch Kids Cookies aren’t chopped up Sour Patch Kids baked into the cookies.

Because if they were, I’d be freaked out by a gummy arm or leg sticking out of the cookie or an eye of a Sour Patch Kid half-buried in the cookie looking at me with a look of vengeance.

Instead of dismembering the popular candy to make these cookies, they have small colorful fruity-flavored chips and even smaller gummy fruity bits that’ll get stuck to your teeth.

Although these are Chips Ahoy cookies, you need to get out of your head that they’re chocolate chip cookies. You will not find brown chocolate chips. You will not see the word “chocolate” anywhere in the ingredients list.

Limited Edition Chips Ahoy Sour Patch Kids Cookies Closeup

What you will see is that the cookies look like what might happen if Crayola and Chips Ahoy collaborated using actual crayon pieces. What you will smell with these cookies is something that reminds me of a fruity breakfast cereal with a citrusy emphasis.

They smell nice, but when it comes to flavor, it’s not as appealing, and these might be Chips Ahoy’s Swedish Fish Oreo. For those of you too young to remember that limited edition Oreo, it was a variety I imagine nine out of ten Oreo fans would consider the titleholder for Weirdest Tasting Oreo Flavor. It also combined a beloved cookie owned by Mondelez International with the flavor of a beloved gummy candy owned by Mondelez International.

Most of the bites taken from these Chips Ahoy Cookies have an odd taste. Both candy bits have some sourness, but it seems to be more noticeable with the chewy nubs. And that sour flavor doesn’t go well with the rest of the cookie.

But the worst part is the aftertaste, which makes me wonder if I just ate an orange Flintstones vitamin or someone forced a fruitcake into my mouth. On the bright side, I should be glad the cookies aren’t as sour as the candy, which would’ve made these even less palatable.

There were a few decent tasting bites that reminded me of a lemon cookie, but, overall, Limited Edition Chips Ahoy Sour Patch Kids is the titleholder for Weirdest Tasting Chips Ahoy Flavor.

Purchased Price: More than anyone should spend on eBay
Size: 1.52 oz./4 cookies
Purchased at: eBay (Originally purchased from Dollar Tree)
Rating: 3 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (4 cookies) 210 calories, 9 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 14 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Sour Patch Kids Frozen Dessert Bars

What are Sour Patch Kids Frozen Dessert Bars?

A vague raspberry flavored ice surrounding a vague vanilla ice cream-like substance, dotted with flavorless bits of Sour Patch Kids.

How are they?

These didn’t succeed, despite seeming like a great idea on paper.

The “redberry” ice pop portion was refreshing and tasted fine. Like Sour Patch Kids candy, it started sour then transitioned to sweet.

I still don’t actually know what “Redberry” is. It tasted like a combination of all the red berries (rasp, straw, even cran), but raspberry was most prominent, so I’m rolling with that.

The “dairy” portion that they or I wouldn’t dare call “ice cream,” was quite bad.

First off, the vanilla gets masked by the sourness of the Redberry ice, which is much colder than the “dairy,” so it’s pretty off-putting once you get to the bottom chunk of exposed vanilla. That’s the only time you can actually distinguish the flavors.

The worst part may have been the texture. It’s a slimy, synthetic, custard-like block that only gets worse with the addition of rubbery Sour Patch Kids “bitz.”

Is there anything else you need to know?

The Redberry ice overwhelms all the other flavors. There’s no strong vanilla ice cream taste at all, and the bits of the various Sour Patch Kid flavors are completely wasted. That was a bummer. I wanted to taste those since you only get one flavor of ice.

If you’ve ever had a custard and ice mix from a place like Rita’s or Ralph’s, this tastes like a dollar store version of those in bar form.

Conclusion:

I think these would succeed better as two separate ideas altogether. I’m sure they exist, but they should just sell SPK flavored ice pops and custard bars with candy bits as two different products.

Don’t even bother with these. There are 100 things better in the same aisle. If you need a Sour Patch Kids fix, just stick with the candy and mix them into a better frozen dessert.

Stay safe, everyone.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 16.5 fl. Oz. (6 bars)
Purchased at: Stop & Shop
Rating: 4 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 Bar) 90 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 20 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of total carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 15 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Sour Patch Kids Blizzard

Dairy Queen Sour Patch Kids Blizzard

When you look at the list of possible Blizzard ingredients on the menu board, which oddly DQ doesn’t really publicize you can use to create a customized creation to your liking, just about everything has been already done between the regular Blizzard menu, Blizzards of the Month, a plethora of seasonal Blizzard menus, plus special Blizzards with movie tie-ins or for the second Tuesday of Lent. DQ has essentially admitted that all the reasonable combinations have been tried, as they tend to recycle some of the same or very similar Blizzards now and then.

Enter the Sour Patch Kids Blizzard, which as far as I can tell after four seconds of online research, is the first time DQ has used these sweet and sour gummies. This latest concoction features vanilla soft serve with Sour Patch Kids Redberry flavor (don’t worry, I didn’t know it was called that either) mixed with Sour Patch Kids Bitz.

The first thing that caught my attention was the smell, which is not something I normally notice or think about with a Blizzard. But this one exudes a fragrant essence of Sour Patch Kids, just like opening a bag of the tasty little fellows.

I’m not sure if the Sour Patch Kids in here were mutilated by the magic Blizzard machine, or if DQ calling them “Bitz” means they were already hacked to pieces before the mixing process. Either way, the pieces of kids are approximately the size of Nerds (which made me pine for the long-deceased Nerds Blizzard of years gone by).

Dairy Queen Sour Patch Kids Blizzard Top

The Bitz in mine didn’t seem to be as large or as plentiful as the promotional photos show, but I might have had a frugal and overzealous mixer. As you might have guessed, the coldness of the ice cream changes the firmness of the Sour Patch Kids a bit. They didn’t have the same soft chewiness you might be accustomed to, but I didn’t find that to be a drawback, and they do pack a sour punch.

The Redberry-flavored soft serve tasted great, like DQ somehow liquified a bag of red Sour Patch Kids and infused it into the ice cream. But before they liquefied the poor little kids, DQ apparently removed the sour coating because the ice cream flavor was all sweetness, and it was splendid. As a standalone treat, I’d eat the ice cream part all day (and all night).

Dairy Queen Sour Patch Kids Blizzard Spoon

The kicker is the little chunks of Sour Patch Kids, which of course still have the sour coating and seemed to have a delayed effect on my taste buds. So first you get the sweetness of the Redberry-flavored ice cream, then slowly you experience the sour flavor in your mouth as the Bitz free themselves from their ice cream cocoons, and then finally you get the sweetness again when you get to the gummy part of the Sour Patch Kids.

Sometimes you don’t know how much you wanted something until you see it, or in this case, taste it. Of all the possible things that can be thrown into a Blizzard, I’m not sure I would have thought of Sour Patch Kids. But I’m glad the Blizzard wizards at DQ gave it a try because it’s a winner in my book and a nice change of pace from some other recent Blizzards that always seem to revolve around chocolate, Oreo, or Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. Since Sour Patch Kids are not a regular DQ menu item, this one figures to be gone for good after July. You have been warned.

Purchased Price: $3.79
Size: Small
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Small) 660 calories, 24 grams of fat, 11 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 190 milligrams of sodium, 82 grams of carbohydrates, -1 grams of dietary fiber*, 86 grams of sugar, and 12 grams of protein.

*The DQ website inexplicably lists a negative amount of dietary fiber. I’m no mathematician or nutritionist, but that seems to be impossible on many levels.

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