As many of you know, earlier this month, my digital camera broke and I had to buy a new one. Many of you also know that it broke while I was taking photos of a product I was planning to review.
Um, that last part was a lie. It actually broke while I was taking photos of myself.
Why was I taking photos of myself? I needed self-portraits for the online dating service Iâ€™m planning to sign up for.
Although Iâ€™m scared to try an online dating service, because who knows what kind of freaky-deeky girl I might end up on a date with? But then again, freaky-deeky sounds pretty goodâ€¦because I’m desperate.
Anyway, the new digital camera I bought was the Canon PowerShot A85. I actually wanted the $200 3.2-megapixel Canon PowerShot A75, but NOBODY had it in stock, so I had to buy the more expensive, 4-megapixel PowerShot A85.
While researching digital cameras, I had to read a lot of reviews. These reviews got pretty boring because they explained things like aperture, ISO, exposure, blah, blah, blah. See it’s pretty boring.
Here at the Impulsive Buy, we’re not going to bore you with stuff like that, instead we will ask hypothetical questions that include scenarios most people would use a camera for and find out if the PowerShot A85 would do a good job in each of these scenarios.
â€œI just gave birth to my daughter, her name is Melody, and I want to take pictures of all the important moments of her young life, like her first steps, her first tooth, and her appearance in the possible future movie Baby Geniuses 3, but I’m not knowledgeable about photography. Is it easy to take photos with this camera?â€
Yes. There’s an Auto Mode that lets the camera do almost all the work, like figuring out the appropriate aperture and shutter speed. All you have to do is point and shoot. The Auto Mode takes great pictures and those pictures will help psychiatrists understand why Melody doesnâ€™t like you for forcing her to be in what will probably be, if they make it, one of the worst movies EVER.
â€œI’m 70-years-old, technophobic, and don’t own a computer. Is this camera good for taking photos of my beautiful, but bratty grandchildren?â€
No. I’ve learned that elderly people with technophobia and digital cameras don’t mix. It’s like sticking a gun in the hands of the Dalai Lama.
As for the lack of a computer, you might be fine there because this camera allows direct printing from the camera to special Canon printers.
On second thought, the technophobia will definitely come into play here because if you canâ€™t set the time on your VCR, you probably wonâ€™t be able to figure out how to print your grandchildrenâ€™s photos from your camera.
â€œIs this camera good for when I go to Mardi Gras and take pictures of women flashing their boobs?â€
Yes. When a woman flashes her boobs, make sure the camera is set to the Fast Shutter option. This allows you to take better photos of those shy women who show their boobs really fast, without the risk of blurred photos. Also, make sure you have a lot of bead necklaces.
â€œI read that the PowerShot A85 allows me to take video clips. Would this be a good option for finding out if my significant other is cheating on me by hiding the camera in the bedroom?â€
No. The video quality for digital still cameras isn’t as good as it would be for real video cameras. Video quality is important in these circumstances because I’m sure you would like to know who your significant other is cheating with so you can hunt that person down. Also, depending on the size of your memory card, the camera can’t take very long clips.
â€œIâ€™m planning to sign up for one of those online dating services and I need to take a picture of myself. Iâ€™m not very good looking and when I tried to take a self-portrait of myself, the digital camera I was using broke down on me. Will this camera break if I take a picture of myself?â€
Yes AND No. Are you wearing a paper bag over your head when you take the picture? If you are, the camera wonâ€™t break. If you arenâ€™t wearing one, I highly suggest you do NOT take a self-portrait because the camera will break.
Also, if youâ€™re extremely claustrophobic and you might suffocate with a paper bag on your head, a big sheet of paper in front of your face can be used instead of a paper bag.
Overall, I liked this camera. It takes great shots and has a great battery life, since it takes four AA batteries to power it. The PowerShot A85 is great for those who just want to point and shoot or for those control freaks that like manual options.
Itâ€™s a great camera for almost any scenario you may face.
Editor’s Note: For more product reviews go check out our friends at the Message Whore.
Item: Canon Powershot A85
Purchase Price: $279.99
Rating: 4 out of 5
Pros: Great for taking pictures of flashing boobs. Allows direct printing from camera to special Canon printers. Wonâ€™t break when ugly people take self-portraits with a paper bag over their head.
Cons: Video option isnâ€™t good for trying to catch your significant other cheating on you. Too complex for elderly, technophobic people.