REVIEW: Totino’s Pizza Stuffers (Pepperoni and Combination)

Totino's Pizza Stuffers

Totino’s Party Pizzas have a special place in my heart, which I hope they’re not clogging with trans fats.

Even though I’ve never seen one at a party, it uses something called “Mozzarella Cheese Substitute,” and its crispy crust sometimes makes my upper palate raw, my mouth can’t help but water when a Totino’s Party Pizza is presented in front of me. So while I’ve never seen Totino’s Party Pizza served at a party, it does create a party in my mouth.

But it’s not just being so damn tasty that makes a Totino’s Party Pizza so special, it’s also its price.

When on sale, you can score yourself one with whatever loose change you can panhandle in 10 minutes outside the store you’re going to purchase it from. Of course, the more charming or desolate you are, the quicker you’ll probably get the one dollar you’ll need to purchase a Party Pizza.

While Totino’s Party Pizzas are tasty and cheap, the two things they aren’t are portable and microwaveable. But Totino’s is trying to solve that with their new Pizza Stuffers, which takes the meat, sauce, and mozzarella cheese substitute on top of a Party Pizza and stuffs it into a golden crust. Think of it as Totino’s delayed answer to the Hot Pocket.

I know Totino’s has their Pizza Rolls, but, seriously, those are meant for 10-year-olds.

The Totino’s Pizza Stuffers come in three varieties: cheese, pepperoni, and combination (sausage and pepperoni). I skipped the cheese one because, really, there’s only so much mozzarella cheese substitute I’m willing to tolerate. Depending on which ethnicity you are, a Pizza Stuffer looks like either an empanada, a gigantic gyoza, a mini calzone, or some kind of dim sum.

Totino's Pizza Stuffers Innards

Preparing a Pizza Stuffer took me about two minutes of microwaving time, flipping it over once at the one minute mark. Just like Hot Pockets, Totino’s hasn’t figured out how to prevent their products from oozing when being microwaved. If you decide to microwave your Totino’s Pizza Stuffer, expect a softer crust that’s a little tough and chewy at the edges. I also baked them in a toaster oven, which takes 20 minutes to heat up at the instructed 425 degrees Fahrenheit. Since they don’t come with fancy crisping sleeves, a crispy crust can only be accomplished in an oven or toaster oven.

If you find yourself staring into the freezer aisle case at your local grocery store because you’re trying to decide which Pizza Stuffers flavor to pick up, I’d suggest picking up the Combination one. The Pepperoni Pizza Stuffers were palatable, but I could hardly taste the pepperoni. Instead, it had a significant tomato sauce flavor. The only difference between the Pepperoni and Combination flavors is the use of pork sausage, but it makes a huge difference in terms of flavor because, unlike the pepperoni in the Pepperoni one, I could actually taste the sausage. I still couldn’t taste the pepperoni in the Combination Pizza Stuffers, but that was expected.

Overall, the Totino’s Pizza Stuffers are a good snack or part of a complete lunch or dinner. If Totino’s Party Pizzas have a special place in your heart, both varieties will have a familiar taste, thanks to that sweet sauce they all have. They’re more expensive and less satisfying than a Party Pizza, but their size makes portion control much easier. Because, seriously, I could inhale a whole Party Pizza in one sitting.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 Pizza Stuffer – Pepperoni – 280 calories, 130 calories from fat, 15 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat*, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 760 milligrams of sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 5 grams of sugar, and 7 grams of protein. Combination – 270 calories, 120 calories from fat, 14 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat*, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 700 milligrams of sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 5 grams of sugar, and 7 grams of protein.)

*uses partially hydrogenated oil

Item: Totino’s Pizza Stuffers (Pepperoni and Combination)
Price: $3.99 (on sale)
Size: 4 count
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Pepperoni)
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Combination)
Pros: Combination flavor is good. Pork sausage brings the flava. If you enjoy Totino’s Party Pizzas, you’ll enjoy these. Portable and microwaveable. Totino’s Party Pizzas.
Cons: Pepperoni flavor was a little disappointing. Uses partially hydrogenated oils. More expensive and less satisfying than a Totino’s Party Pizza. No crisping sleeves. Uses something called mozzarella cheese substitute. Eating a Totino’s Party Pizza in one sitting.

21 thoughts to “REVIEW: Totino’s Pizza Stuffers (Pepperoni and Combination)”

  1. In junior high my friends and I would eat dozens of Totino’s pizza rolls, drink Coke, then go out and play basketball for hours because that combination guaranteed the worst gas ever. 17 years later I can still smell it. We weren’t real popular with the ladies back then.

  2. Who cares if their pizza rolls are meant for 10 year olds. They’re effin’ delicious.

  3. I freaking loved Totino’s pizzas when I was a kid and left to my own devices all summer. My sister and I would split one. Not sure we could do that these days since she’s eschewing dairy and white flour and I’ve recently dropped 20 pounds but oooooh the memories!

  4. I will be eating the shit out of these once I remember to buy them at the grocery store. I actually have a party pizza in the freezer that I’m planning to eat tonight.

    1. Nah, you should skip these. I found my receipt for them and regular price was $7.99. But if you do buy them, make sure you buy them on sale.

  5. when you said portion control I accidentally read that as “poison control” because thats who I feel like calling everytime I eat a Totino’s Pizza. For some reason the rolls are ok. But the pizza…. bad results

  6. These are SUPER GROSS! Tried them yesterday. I paid $1.68 for the box of 4 and it was way too much! I love the party pizzas and pizza rolls so I thought I would love these. Gross. The crust is way too thick for the amount of filling and they just overall did not taste good. (i got them at wal-mart a used a $1 off cooupon)

  7. The time on the box is very incorrect I had to cook the stuffers for almost 30 minutes because the dough on the inside was completely raw after the time they say.

  8. Was wanting to know if Totino’s stopped making the pizza stuffers because I had been buying them at my local Walmart and they hanen’t had them for a while now

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