Generally speaking, there are three ways companies try to make something better: make it bigger, make more of it, or transform it in such a fundamental way that it becomes something completely different, like the crap direction Disney is taking the Star Wars Universe in.
As you can tell by my feelings on the last option, none of these strategies are foolproof.
Fresh off putting brisket, pork belly, and Bambi’s mom into a sandwich, the people who practically trademarked the plural version of “meat” have set out to transform an Oreo cookie into a doughnut hole.
Surprisingly, the results are pretty good.
Arby’s advertises these as “doughnut bites,” but the texture defies such a simple classification. The bites lack the light shell and spring of a yeast doughnut hole but also the sturdy and firm interior of a cake doughnut hole. Instead, they have a sort of partially deflated volleyball texture.
As horrible as that sounds, the chocolate cures all. The exterior has a warm, moist give that has that characteristic deep flavor of an Oreo wafer and then some. Served hot, each bite reminded me of a chocolate lava cake, while the dusting covering each bite could have been from the bottom of a bag of mini Oreo cookies.
While the deep chocolate flavor nails, and perhaps even improves, the classic Oreo wafer, the crème is about as disappointing as Rian Johnson’s treatment of Luke Skywalker.
“Goo” would be a better way to describe the crème, which is slightly thinner than an Arby’s milkshake. Served warm, it has a kind of melted marshmallow mouthfeel (say that fast 10 times) and a moderate vanilla flavor. But there’s nothing overly sweet about it, which means there’s no dramatic contrast with the chocolate bite. Put another way, the chocolate-to-crème ratio borders on reduced fat Oreo standards —- a far cry from the ideal Double Stuf Oreo we all love.
Complicating things, the goo sloshes around the bite and all too easily squirts out. It creates a Gushers effect in cookies and crème form. All things considered, the crème neither delivers on its own or in a complete bite with the rest of the Oreo elements. It would make a pretty lit coffee creamer, though.
All things considered, Arby’s Oreo Bites do an amazing job of enhancing the deep cocoa appeal of the Oreo wafer. That said, if texture matters at all to you or if you’re a crème kind of girl or guy, the bites are going to fall a little short of expectations. But don’t worry, it’s not quite The Last Jedi short of expectations.
(Nutrition Facts – 330 calories, 190 calories from fat, 21 grams of total fat, 10 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 115 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 1 grams of dietary fiber, 17 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein..)
Purchased Price: $2.49
Purchased at: Arby’s
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Excellent chocolate flavor combines the best of an Oreo wafer and Devil’s Food cake. Larger than your standard doughnut hole. Oreo dust. Didn’t leave me as disappointed as The Last Jedi.
Cons: Crème is more melted milkshake than actual Oreo crème. Balance of chocolate and crème is out of sync. More expensive than doughnut holes. Accidentally squirting white goo all over my pants.
7 thoughts to “REVIEW: Arby’s Oreo Bites”
I think many, many people, myself included, disagree with you on the Disney thing. I really like the movies going back to the original ‘lighthearted’ bantering and action. None of this deep thinking crap.
I can’t even focus on the opinion I have regarding that Disney remark because I can’t look past one single sentence…. “a warm, moist give”…. moist….
It was such a beautiful, delicious looking dessert until that word ruined it for me… o.o
This was great. You’re a funny dude, and the writing/review part wasn’t half bad either. Definitely glad Google offered you up in the face of a depraved “Oreo Bite” curiosity.
I tried these today. Disappointed. First, i missed the “wafer” part, so maybe that kinda skewed my opinion a little. I was expecting something a little more chocolatey and dense (like Church’s oreo bites). Second, i dont think it was worth the price. I did like that it wasnt really sweet or made with a cake icing-esque filling. Not bad, but wouldnt buy for myself (seems good for the kiddies tho). Definitely gotta eat ’em hot or the creme just soaks away into the cake like a sponge.
I live 2 minutes away. There was no crime whatsoever when I got home and the cake was hard. Did the creme sink into the cake that fast? What a disappointment. Don’t waste your money.
I agree that the Star Wars movies are different but that’s not your article is it, I think they are okay even tho I disagree with certain things but nevertheless it has nothing to do with your article.
I like the part where you said” squirting white goo all over my pants””. Lol. What a good belly laugh!!
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