Few fast food corporations seem to truly love their customers the way that Taco Bell does.
Let’s be honest: with the kind, loving hand of a well-meaning father, everything and anything the Bell creates is done simply to make us, the fickle consumer, in the broadest of generalities, happy. Very happy. They just want to see a satisfied smile on our faces by consistently going above and beyond our culinary dreams in ways the other fast food joints either can’t or refuse to.
From their now-legendary forays into the Tex-Mex beyond with items like the long-forgotten Bell Beefer sandwich and the heat-punishing Volcano Taco, to recent developments like the blockbuster Doritos Locos Tacos and those omnipresent Nacho Fries, if you can dream it, then the kitchen witches at Taco Bell can probably make it a reality.
Case in point, their latest liquidic offering is the absolutely transcendent Strawberry Skittles Freeze, a tart and tangy frozen sojourn into absolute tooth-rotting bliss. Even more so than their Air Heads or Starburst variations, this chilly elixir perfectly captures the very essence and aura of a strawberry Skittle — everyone’s favorite flavor, right? — and pulverizes it down into a sweetly-sour near-solid that is worth the numerous brain-freezes that should occur from sip after fruity sip.
Available in a 16 oz. size for $2.39, you’d think that this would be a prime example of sickly-sweet overkill as many of these experiments often tend to be, but the flavor wizards at TB have managed to get the perfect balance, creating a frozen beverage that is finally without a sour, throaty aftertaste from the sweeteners or, even worse, the archetypical queasy stomach from the massive fructose overload. I ordered two —- one with my meal and one for the road and it was an oh-so-smooth ride the whole time.
This leads the door wide open, hopefully and blessedly, for the Bell to create even more candy-inspired frozen drinks; a lemon-lime Skittles frozen lemonade would be quite bomb, especially in the summertime on a rather sultry Sunday right after mowing the yard. But why stop there? How about a Sour Patch Kids Watermelon freeze to sneak into the movies or, por mi gente, a tamarindo or mango con chile concoction of some sort, maybe with a Tajin seasoning packet for the experts. The Bell’s the limit!
But, until then, I will be happily sipping and slurping the rainbow with every limited-time only moment of refreshing romance I have with the Strawberry Skittles Freeze, thanking my pals at Taco Bell from the very bottom of my enlarged heart for, once again, thinking outside the bun and making my most edible of dreams come true like an overweight (and far more watchable) version of the movie Inception. ¡Cómpralo ya!
(Nutrition Facts – 160 calories, 0 calories from fat, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 40 milligrams of sodium, 43 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 43 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.)
Purchased Price: $2.39
Size: 16 oz.
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: Tastes like frozen Skittle juice. No sickly-sweet stomach ache. ice cold and refreshing.
Cons: Limited-time only.