REVIEW: SPAM Breaded Pork Patties

SPAM Breaded Pork Patties

I had HUGE plans for these SPAM Breaded Pork Patties.

I hoped to top one with pineapple chutney and then put it on a bed of homemade coleslaw with a side of mashed sweet potatoes.

Then I wanted to drizzle another one with a made-from-scratch barbecue sauce, top it with a slice of smoked gouda and coleslaw, and put in a toasted King’s Hawaiian dinner roll.

Another idea was to place it on a bed of steaming rice, smother that with gravy made from SPAM drippings, top all that with a fried quail egg, and then add a side of coleslaw.

However, much like I have no idea why coleslaw is involved with every recipe, I also have no idea how to make chutney, mashed sweet potatoes, barbecue sauce, gravy from SPAM drippings, or coleslaw. So none of my HUGE plans came to fruition.

SPAM Breaded Pork Patties Curry

Instead, I added them to my Japanese curry, which I do know how to make because it only involves boiling the water the curry mix dissolves in. I also stuck one in a breakfast sandwich for SPAMs and giggles. In both preparations, they were enjoyable.

SPAM Breaded Pork Patties Frozen

SPAM Breaded Pork Patties Baked

The patties, of which there are 18, look smaller than slices one would get from a slab of SPAM, even with the breading. I’m talking width and length. When it comes to thickness, the image on the box doesn’t accurately show how thin they are in real life.

SPAM Breaded Pork Patties Thin

There are three ways to prepare the frozen patties — oven, stovetop, or air fryer. I went with my toaster oven because my kitchen hasn’t moved into the present with all those fancy doodads, like them Instagram Neti Pots and sous-veni-vidi-vici cookers.

The breading isn’t heavily seasoned, so the porky and slightly greasy SPAM flavor comes through, but it’s dampened a little from the coating. The crust also covers up the pinkness of the processed pork product, which has known to turn off taste buds. The breading also has a satisfying crispiness, especially along the edges, that maintained its texture with curry. In the breakfast sandwich, not surprisingly, it tasted like the canned meat in a breakfast sandwich. Although, the patty looked kind of ridiculous in it.

SPAM Breaded Pork Patties Sandwich

Of course, if you hate SPAM, these aren’t going to change your mind about the product.

I regularly eat SPAM, but I don’t buy cans of it because the introvert in me hates having to ask store employees to release a few from under lock and key. My consumption comes from pre-cooked foods that have it, like SPAM Musubi or whatever our fast food chains offer.

But these breaded SPAM patties are something I’d buy again because they’re not behind anything to thwart shoplifters, their flavor has that recognizable porky taste I enjoy, they have a crispy exterior, they seem to be versatile, and they’re extremely convenient.

Maybe next time I’ll be more creative with them.

Purchased Price: $9.59
Size: 27 oz./18 patties
Purchased at: Costco
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 patties) 290 calories, 22 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 33 milligrams of cholesterol, 700 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 2 grams of sugar, and 8 grams of protein.

13 thoughts to “REVIEW: SPAM Breaded Pork Patties”

  1. You got Breaded Spam at a Costco on Oahu?

    It’s probably sold out now! But I’m gonna keep an eye out.

    1. Actually, I bought these at the end of February at the Hawaii Kai Costco. I haven’t been there since you know what happened, so I don’t know if it’s still in stock.

  2. I’m intrigued, and also loved the humour in your review. They should release a version of these that are round rather than rectangular for fully brekkie sammie.

  3. Gosh Id like to send you spam. I live a hundred miles or so from where it’s made and have been to the spam museum. It’s out of stock around here but normally $3 for a can. My husband likes it. I’m not clear if this item is in refrigerator section or on the shelf?

    1. It’s in the frozen food section. I can’t believe I forgot to mention that. Made a small edit to make that clearer.

      I’ve also been to the SPAM museum in Minnesota, but that was a decade ago. I wonder if it has changed.

      1. IT was a decade ago we went too, and I understand it has moved. I wouldn’t mind another trip when this get normal. How much does spam cost in Hawaii ?

    1. It’s a Japanese curry brand called Vermont Curry (I do not know why it’s called Vermont Curry). If you have an Asian section at your supermarket, you might be able to find it. If not Vermont Curry, then maybe S&B curry.

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