My Starbucks card is almost always used to purchase a trenta-sized Starbucks Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew. No additions. No swapping. All I say are the words “vanilla sweet cream cold brew,” plus the word “please,” and I end up with a massive cup of it that has enough caffeine to make my heart beat like a drum at a heavy metal festival.
So imagine my excitement when I found out Starbucks was offering a bottled version of my preferred drink. I was so hyped about it that I added it to my Amazon Subscribe & Save so that I can experience the coffee drink whenever I want when I’m at home.
Sure, I’ll be a pain in the Starbutt to earn Starbucks Stars for them since I have to jump through hoops that involve uploading receipts. But once the caffeine starts flowing through my bloodstream, I think I’ll be all better.
However, after tasting it, I canceled the Amazon subscription because this bottled Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew is a poor representation of the Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew that I get handed to me with my name on it.
Yes, I didn’t expect this bottled version to taste EXACTLY like what I’ve gotten from a barista. But I also didn’t expect it would taste like any other bottled coffee drink.
With a regular Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew drinks, there’s some substance because of the cold brew and cream. It has a noticeable vanilla flavor, and it’s sweet, but that sugariness doesn’t hide the cold brew. But with this bottled version, it’s thin, and it has a flavor I can’t discern from other sweetened bottled iced coffee drinks that also have milk. Basically, it tastes bottled Frappuccino-ish, and that’s not what I want. If I wanted that, I’D JUST BUY A DAMN BOTTLED FRAPPUCCINO! saijo;lop.s
Sorry, the caffeine wore off. And that gibberish at the end was me slamming my keyboard because of my disappointment with this coffee drink and probably caffeine withdrawal.
Purchased Price: $4.79
Size: 11 fl oz
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 bottle) 120 calories, 3 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 50 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 18 grams of sugar, 13 grams of added sugar, and 4 grams of protein, and 155 milligrams of caffeine.