REVIEW: Starbucks Bottled Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew

Starbucks Bottled Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew Bottle

My Starbucks card is almost always used to purchase a trenta-sized Starbucks Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew. No additions. No swapping. All I say are the words “vanilla sweet cream cold brew,” plus the word “please,” and I end up with a massive cup of it that has enough caffeine to make my heart beat like a drum at a heavy metal festival.

So imagine my excitement when I found out Starbucks was offering a bottled version of my preferred drink. I was so hyped about it that I added it to my Amazon Subscribe & Save so that I can experience the coffee drink whenever I want when I’m at home.

Sure, I’ll be a pain in the Starbutt to earn Starbucks Stars for them since I have to jump through hoops that involve uploading receipts. But once the caffeine starts flowing through my bloodstream, I think I’ll be all better.

However, after tasting it, I canceled the Amazon subscription because this bottled Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew is a poor representation of the Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew that I get handed to me with my name on it.

Yes, I didn’t expect this bottled version to taste EXACTLY like what I’ve gotten from a barista. But I also didn’t expect it would taste like any other bottled coffee drink.

Starbucks Bottled Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew Bottle Closeup

With a regular Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew drinks, there’s some substance because of the cold brew and cream. It has a noticeable vanilla flavor, and it’s sweet, but that sugariness doesn’t hide the cold brew. But with this bottled version, it’s thin, and it has a flavor I can’t discern from other sweetened bottled iced coffee drinks that also have milk. Basically, it tastes bottled Frappuccino-ish, and that’s not what I want. If I wanted that, I’D JUST BUY A DAMN BOTTLED FRAPPUCCINO! saijo;lop.s

Sorry, the caffeine wore off. And that gibberish at the end was me slamming my keyboard because of my disappointment with this coffee drink and probably caffeine withdrawal.

Purchased Price: $4.79
Size: 11 fl oz
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 bottle) 120 calories, 3 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 50 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 18 grams of sugar, 13 grams of added sugar, and 4 grams of protein, and 155 milligrams of caffeine.

7 thoughts to “REVIEW: Starbucks Bottled Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew”

  1. WOW. This review was trés useful. My next in-person Starbucks purchase will be a barista-made Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew, trenta-size, because I, too, love sweet cream, and vanilla, and plenty of caffeine. I owe you, Marvo!

  2. I had to look up what trenta-size consisted of…as, in spite of my countless visits to Starbucks over the many, many years, I had never heard of such a thing. Now, not only do I know what it is, but also that it’s a “secret”/off-the-menu size.

    And, can I say: I LOVE me my coffee…but, holy molars, that sucker sure holds a lot o’ liquid!

  3. I figured trenta had to mean triple size. I love my java, but I also love cream and sugar, so the extra is fine with me. On a day when I’m already sloshing, I just add an extra shot to my drink and forgo the extra liquid. We do what we gotta do!

  4. hate hate caffein.. not good for u… seruously better ways to get energy but again plp r quick to drink this bleep bleep stuff.. have fun crashing urself to death and a doc vivost due to to much palpitations… so many obvious sheeps that will like anythung because its oroginal… i always trust the reviews here sp thankfully ive had many great finding and igbnorrd many too.. thanx again…

  5. Vanilla Cream Cold Brew is my drink (Nitro preferably), but none of their packaged Cold Brew drinks are any good. All of their pre-made cold brew just does not taste right. It’s nothing compared to fresh cold brew.

  6. I never order anything other than a Grande Single Shot Iced or Hot Latte, or Venti Double Shot. For a short time, I really liked that salted cream topping they had, but that calls for some flavor so I’d venture into flavored drinks to support it. Your review makes me want to try this concoction, so I’m going to order it next time!

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