REVIEW: Lay’s Kettle Cooked Potato Chips (Spicy Cayenne & Cheese and Creamy Mediterranean Herb)

/ / Reviews / 4 Comments

Lay's Kettle Cooked Creamy Mediterranean Herb and Spicy Cayenne & Cheese

In recent years it’s as if Lay’s has decided test marketing is entirely too passé for them. Apparently, all the cool kids are now releasing regionally-specific products and quietly incorporating the best loved flavors into the national lineup over time. Besides, test marketing sounds so… iffy. It’s the difference between “Hey, try this… thing!” and “I made this just for you!”

Luckily, this practice has not yet been applied to their Kettle Cooked line. Both new flavors managed to make their way to my obscure, out-of-the-way location way out in the middle of everywhere. And thank God, because the Sandy Egg keeps getting lumped in with the general Southwest and receiving an annual truckload of rebranded nacho cheese chips. Really, Lay’s? Really? You had me at chile limón.

Please stop barraging me with malformed clones and crappy imitations. I will try them once, foist the remnants on unsuspecting party guests, and never ever touch this season’s abomination again, and you know this.

What’s that? One of the new Kettle Cooked flavors is Spicy Cayenne & Cheese (heretofore known as SCC)? Great. Thanks.

I choose to approach this bag still hoping for the best. Lay’s has trained me to automatically delight in Easy Mac powder and dried jalapenos delivered in bold new ratios. My expectations are low; my palate bored stupid.

Kettle cooked chips always feel more refined, somehow, than their counterparts. I don’t know why this is – they’re greasier, fatter, and far more prone to little oil bubbles. If they were people, I’d probably quietly avoid them. In chip form, though, they might as well come with little monocles and bow ties stamped on. They are the nouveau riche of chip empire, loyal to their potato roots, a little trashy, totally inept at blending in with the classics, but irresistible when dolled up in just the right bag. The rest of the snack aisle must hate them.

The newest additions to this Beverly Hillbillies-esque clan are Creamy Mediterranean Herb (CMH) and the aforementioned nacho cheese retread. Both are made with white cheddar and bonus goodies. CMH gets the buttermilk treatment, as well as oregano, basil, and sun-dried tomatoes. SCC comes complete with a bit of a cayenne, but fewer overall frills.

Let’s dig in.

We might have a small problem on our hands, but don’t panic. Just answer me this: have any of you seen Cool Ranch or Nacho Cheese Doritos around lately? Because I think I just found their flavorings scattered about in the wrong bags, red and green spicy flecks strewn this way and that, cheese powder spilling onto my jeans. Oh the humanity! While mildly horrified at this gruesome turn of events, being something of a psychopath myself, I do have to admit that the Kettle Cooked line of chips seem to wear their stolen coatings well.

Lay's Kettle Cooked Creamy Mediterranean Herb

The pre-dipped sour creaminess of CMH is quickly growing on me. The basil flavor is balcony-garden fresh and prominent in every bite. The buttermilk also manages to shine through, adding some ranchiness to the mix. The sun-dried tomato flecks, however? Purely aesthetic. CMH manages to toe the line between refreshing and dense. I find myself going back for a handful now and then, but this definitely isn’t one of the “oh no – oh dear god no – HOW IS THE BAG ALREADY EMPTY?” kind of flavors. I’m used to seeing this combination more in cracker form where backdrops of baked wheat and oats work in tandem with the creaminess to keep things from getting sickeningly heavy. It works here for awhile, but at a certain point, I hit a wall.

Lay's Kettle Cooked Spicy Cayenne & Cheese

SCC tastes vaguely similar to cheesy Sun Chips at first bite. The cayenne delivers a nice kick without sending me rushing for a glass of water. I’m powerless to say no to zesty cheese even after one hundred previous incarnations of varying quality have assailed my senses. These taste much lighter than their creamy herb buddies and many of the other Kettle Cooked varieties. The cheese hasn’t been overdone this time, and I think that’s the difference. It’s there, but it’s quiet, and it’s distinctly white cheddary, rather than whatever it is Kraft keeps cranking out. The nondescript “cheese” label does these guys a huge disservice. I might actually buy these again, provided I forget to eat before heading to the store.

All in all, a good showing from Lay’s. Both flavors make for interesting and tasty additions to the picnic table this summer, especially if your region lacks chile limón goodness. However, I do not recommend combining the two flavors and calling it a complete meal. That was a mistake.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 ounce/16 chips – Creamy Mediterranean Herb – 150 calories, 80 calories from fat, 9 grams of fat, 1 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 grams polyunsaturated fat, 4 grams monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 140 milligrams of sodium, 360 milligrams of potassium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein. Spicy Cayenne and Cheese – 150 calories, 80 calories from fat, 9 grams of fat, 1 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 grams polyunsaturated fat, 4 grams monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 140 milligrams of sodium, 350 milligrams of potassium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Item: Lay’s Kettle Cooked Potato Chips (Spicy Cayenne & Cheese and Creamy Mediterranean Herb)
Price: $1.99 on sale (regularly $3.49)
Size: 8.5 ounces
Purchased at: Albertson’s
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Spicy Cayenne & Cheese)
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Creamy Mediterranean Herb)
Pros: Tiny monocles. Basil explosions in my mouth. The light kick of cayenne. The subtlety of white cheddar. Chips made just for me. Chile limón. Picnics. The convenience of hungry party guests.
Cons: May or may not have murdered some Doritos for their flavors. More nacho cheese stereotyping for the Southwest. Creamy Mediterranean herb gets kind of dense and overwhelming after a few handfuls. Kettle cooked chips greasy, fat, and alienated from the cool kids. Spicy cayenne and cheese must compete with all the other clones for my attention.

NEWS: Mentos UP2U Gum Lets You Choose What Your Breath Is Going To Smell Like

/ / Spotted on Shelves / 2 Comments

Update:

Each pack of Mentos’ new UP2U Gum contains two flavors and according to the packaging it’s up to you to decide which flavor you’re going to choose to chew.

It sounds like a simple decision to make, but let me make it complex for you. Mentos UP2U Gum comes in four varieties: Daylight Mint/Mintnight Mint, Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh, Berry Watermelon/Fresh Mint, and Mandarin Strawberry/Spearmint.

So you’re going to have to choose between those four varieties, but before that you have to choose which checkout line you’re going to wait in. Do you go with unfriendly male cashier who scans items quickly, but sucks at bagging goods? Or do you go with the talkative female cashier who asks you how you’re doing, but stops scanning in order to do so?

Once you pick a checkout line, which is where you’ll most likely find the Mentos UP2U Gum, you’ll then have to choose between the four varieties and you have to do it before the cashier rings up the people in front of you. Depending on what the shoppers in front of you are purchasing and whether or not you have a slow cashier, you have somewhere between 30 seconds to 4 minute to decide. You could buy all of them, but do you really chew that much gum?

Once you’ve chosen your pack, you’ve narrowed it down to two flavors, but I prefer to not think of them as flavors. Instead, I think of them as what your breath is going to smell like. What your breath smells like as you chew Mentos UP2U Gum could determine whether or not you get that first kiss, or whether or not your co-workers feel comfortable working closely with you, or it’ll determine if your grandma will kiss you on the cheek or mouth.

Good luck with choosing which flavor to chew.

Each pack of sugarfree Mentos UP2U Gum contains 14 pieces and will retail for $1.49.

NEWS: Jamba Juice’s New Line of Fruit Refreshers Includes Mother Nature’s Gatorade

/ / Fast Food News / 1 Comment

Coconut Tree

Coconut water has been praised by people who are much skinnier than me and do something called exercise for being a fat free beverage that contains electrolytes, potassium, and antioxidants. Some of those people call coconut water Mother Nature’s Gatorade, but others call it the most pain in the ass beverage to extract.

Thankfully, coconut water has recently become a trendy beverage and a number of companies have been doing the coconut water extracting for us and putting it into easy to drink containers. Coconut water has become so happenin’ that Jamba Juice is jumping on the coconut water bandwagon with their Fruit Refreshers with Coconut Water.

The Fruit Refreshers line comes in three flavors:

Purely Pineapple – a blend of pineapple juice, pineapple sherbet, coconut water, peaches, and ice.

Strawberry Lemonade – a combination of strawberries, lemonade, coconut water, lime sherbet, sorbet, and ice.

Tropical Mango – a blend of mangos, passion-mango juice, coconut water, pineapple sherbet, orange sherbet, and ice.

A 16-ounce serving of each flavor has 230 calories or less, contains as much potassium as a banana, are made with whole fruit, and are an excellent source of vitamin C. The new Fruit Refreshers with Coconut Water will be available beginning Tuesday, May 24. Hey! That’s tomorrow!

Also, for a limited time, Jamba Juice is providing a coupon for you to try a Sixteen size Fruit Refresher for just two smackers at participating locations. You can print a coupon from www.jambajuice.com or http://www.facebook.com/jambajuice.

REVIEW: Nabisco Chips Ahoy! Chewy Gooey Cookies (Chocofudge and Megafudge)

/ / Reviews / 14 Comments

Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Chocofudge

Chips Ahoy cookies are like the human drug testing subjects of the cookie world because Nabisco will stick anything into them to see if it works. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups…yup. Heath Candy Bar pieces…yup. Candy coated chocolate pieces…yup. Oatmeal…yup. Patriotism…yup.

This time around they’re putting fudge into the center of their signature chocolate chip cookies to create Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Chocofudge and Megafudge cookies. Yes, the fudge puts the “gooey” in the Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey. Yes, Chocofudge and Megafudge sound like Godzilla’s gigantic blob-like neighbors on Monster Island. And, yes, I wish one of them was named Superfudge so that, much like Nabisco stuffs fudge into these cookies, I could stuff this review with Judy Blume references.

The Chocofudge version looks like a regular Chewy Chips Ahoy cookie, while the Megafudge looks like a Chips Ahoy cookie from a bizarro dimension with its chocolate cookie and white chocolate chips. Although, due to the fudge injection, both varieties look a little more plump than regular Chewy Chips Ahoy.

Fudge fills each cookie like a Great Dane fills a Smart Car. With the amount of fudge it’s almost impossible to not get fudge in every bite, unless you’re one of those odd people who nibbles a cookie like a bunny rabbit nibbles on a carrot.

Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Megafudge

The Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey cookies are chewy, but I’m not completely sold on the gooey part. In my mind I’ve always imagined gooey being something soft and sticky that holds together as if their lives depended on it as it’s being stretched apart and only separating because gravity demanded it. Although, I may have this mindset from watching way too many pizza commercials. There is some stretching, but the fudge gives up easily, much like I do when playing Madden at All-Madden difficulty. But the fudge doesn’t cry, throw a controller across the room, and scream “I suuuuuck.”

While they aren’t gooey in my eyes, the Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Chocofudge are really good and a step above regular Chewy Chips Ahoy. Heck, let me say they’re also better than regular non-chewy Chips Ahoy. The fudge, while not quality stuff, does give the cookie a significantly stronger chocolate flavor which makes these cookies much more satisfying than regular Chips Ahoy.

Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Cookies

As for the Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Megafudge, I can’t say I enjoyed them as much as the Chocofudge. And I blame the white chocolate chips for that. The chocolate cookie and fudge give it a deep chocolate flavor, but the white chocolate chips disrupt it. They’re like those people who ruin the telling of a really good story by interrupting the storyteller at the most interesting moments with meaningless comments and questions, like “What happened next?” or “If that was me, I’d slap that bitch.”

What happened next? If you shut up, you’ll find out.

I’m glad Nabisco decided to stuff fudge into these Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey cookies instead of dipping them in fudge like they do with their Oreo cookies, because having fudge on the outside tends to get a little messy. Although, since Chips Ahoy are like the human drug testing subjects of the cookie world, I wouldn’t be surprised if a fudge filled and fudge dipped Chips Ahoy cookie popped up on store shelves.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – Chocofudge – 150 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 2 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 110 milligrams of sodium, 60 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 grams of protein. Megafudge – 150 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 2 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 110 milligrams of sodium, 80 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 grams of protein)

Item: Nabisco Chips Ahoy! Chewy Gooey Cookies (Chocofudge and Megafudge)
Price: $3.99 each
Size: 10 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Chocofudge)
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Megafudge)
Pros: Chocofudge is a better Chips Ahoy cookie. Enough fudge to have fudge in every bite. Strong chocolate flavor. Not using an exclamation point after EVERY Chips Ahoy reference. Judy Blume.
Cons: Not as gooey as I hoped. White chocolate chips throw off flavor of Megafudge. People who interrupt storytellers. Playing Madden at All-Madden level.

NEWS: New Splenda Essentials Will Give Us More Than An Artificial Sweetener Aftertaste

/ / Spotted on Shelves

Splenda

Whenever I put a spoonful of sugar in my iced tea or a pinch of sugar on my cereal or a sprinkle of sugar on ice cream or dump half a box of sugar on the ground to attract ants so that I can burn them with the sun and a magnifying glass, I wonder if it’s possible to give sugar properties that go beyond rotting my teeth and making me gain weight when I consume it with my iced tea, cereal, and ice cream. For example, sugar with calcium or sugar with caffeine.

While Splenda isn’t pure sugar, it now comes in new varieties that have added nutritional benefits.

The new line of zero calorie artificial sweeteners is called Splenda Essentials and they come in three varieties. Splenda Essentials with Fiber offers one gram of fiber per packet; Splenda Essentials with B Vitamins has 20 percent of the daily values of vitamins B1, B5 and B6 per packet; and Splenda Essentials with Antioxidants contains 20 percent of the daily values of vitamins C and E per packet.

All three Splenda Varieties are available in 80-count boxes of packets and have a suggested retail price of $4.29. Splenda Essentials with Fiber is also available in a 1.6-pound carton and a 3-pound resealable bag and retail for $4.99 and $7.49, respectively.

Scroll to Top