REVIEW: Limited Edition Blackout Cake Oreo Cookies

Quick show of hands. Who knows what a blackout cake is?

Okay. Now how many NON-New Yorkers know what a blackout cake is? As a tried and true Midwesterner, I’d heard the name, but that was about it. Before researching, I assumed that it derived its moniker from being extremely chocolatey; and while it is, in fact, quite chocolatey indeed, the “Brooklyn” Blackout Cake, as it is also known, received its name during WW2 when, per a Politico article, “blackout drills were performed in homes around the borough to avoid silhouetting battleships leaving from the Brooklyn Navy Yard.” Ebinger’s, a beloved Brooklyn bakery chain, applied the name to a popular cake of its design, a multi-layer chocolate affair with pudding between the layers and chocolate cake crumbs on its exterior.

Although Ebinger’s closed shop decades ago, the cake is still made by cake makers worldwide. But if you’re not near a bakery — or you don’t want to buy a whole cake, or your preferred bakery doesn’t MAKE a blackout cake — you’re in luck. Because, like most other desserts and dessert-adjacent products, it’s an Oreo now.

But, okay — how does “pudding” translate into an Oreo creme filling? Well, quite honestly, it doesn’t. Pudding is much more of a texture thing, right? And Oreo creme is Oreo creme. Oh sure, sometimes it has little crunchy bits, but the creme can’t go more gelatinous or pudding-esque. So instead of anything evoking an essence of pudding, you’ve got two fairly indiscernible chocolate cremes — one a bit dark (the devil’s food component? They call it “dark chocolate” on the website) — and the other a bit light. They both taste like run-of-the-mill chocolate Oreo filling, and I really couldn’t even tell one was “dark” chocolate.

There’s nothing interesting or new about the crunchy outer exterior, either; it is, unapologetically, a standard chocolate Oreo cookie.

So then, you may be wondering, what’s the point of this Oreo? And to you, I say, I really don’t know. This is a chocolate Oreo with chocolate creme filling. Someone I was sharing them with suggested that they thought one of the cremes was similar to the brownie component of Oreo’s Brookie-O cookie, but that seemed like wishful thinking to me.

In the end, this is a fine product because it’s a chocolate creme Oreo. And those are tasty. But unless you’re a diehard Oreo completist, it’s not the end of the world if you miss out on this release. And if you’re in the market to waste some calories on Oreo cookies, there are plenty of better options. Or if you’re feeling REALLY wild, maybe seek out a blackout cake itself.

Purchased Price: $4.58
Size: 12.2 oz
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) – 140 calories, 6 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 105 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Trader Joe’s Coffee & Dark Chocolate Joe-Joe’s

What are they?

The latest in a line of premium single-sleeve coated Joe-Joe cookies from the best grocery house brand in the game; chocolate sandwich cookies with coffee creme in a dark chocolate and coffee coating.

How are they?

It should come as no surprise — these are awesome. The first thing I notice upon close inspection are the little specs of espresso bean within the drizzle, and the flavor comes through swimmingly. There’s no doubt that these are chocolate-forward, but a bold espresso flavor pops in pretty prominently right after the bittersweet and creamy dark chocolate coating finishes up its opening flourish. The cookie is very crunchy, almost to a fault in that it threatens to explode and crumble everywhere if you’re not careful enough. Luckily, I am a professional.

These dunked and drizzled cookies remind me a lot of a chocolate-covered espresso bean but with reverse ratios of coffee to chocolate. The stronger components are chocolaty sweet — the dark chocolate coating and the wafer cookie — but there’s no denying the presence of ground coffee in the creme and drizzle that gives it that bold bean-adjacent flavor. They’re excellent.

Anything else you need to know?

In 2017 Trader Joe’s beat Nabisco to the punch and released Mocha Joe-Joe’s mere months before the Limited Edition Dunkin Donuts Mocha Oreo debuted. Both were solid cookies, but the Joe-Joe edged out the Oreo just a bit, largely thanks to its bold and authentic coffee flavor. Six years later, TJ’s still hangs its hat on that coffee intensity, and the extra layer of chocolate is a higher quality than anything Nabisco has ever rolled out.

Conclusion:

Trader Joe’s Coffee & Dark Chocolate Joe-Joe’s are not for those who aren’t into the true flavor of coffee, but they’re not reserved for those (like myself) who prefer their coffee black either. They have a brilliant balance of in-your-face-taste and creamy satisfaction that will leave most, if not all, coffee drinkers pleased with their purchase.

Purchased Price: $3.49
Size: 6.8 Ounces
Purchased at: Trader Joe’s
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cookie, 24g) 120 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 45 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Girl Scouts Raspberry Rally Cookies

There’s a common misconception that, as the father of a Girl Scout (Brownie, technically), I am privy to cookie discounts. This is patently false. In fact, what ACTUALLY happens is that I end up having to buy more cookies than just about anyone else. Here’s how that transpires.

“Dad, I’m only ten boxes away from the next prize.”

“Which is?”

“At 100 boxes, I get a glow-in-the-dark cup.”

So I sigh, pull out my wallet, and fork over the whatever-amount-needed to ensure that she can obtain what theoretically amounts to a $600 plastic cup.

The good news is that Girl Scout cookies are wonderful. Well, some of them. Peanut Butter Patties (aka Tagalongs), Caramel deLites (aka Samoas), and Thin Mints are all excellent selections, obviously, and there are others that will do in a pinch. It is from the Thin Mint that ABC Bakers draws inspiration for its latest offering: the Raspberry Rally.

Marketed as “the thin, crispy cookie infused with raspberry flavor and dipped in chocolaty coating,” and “a ‘sister’ cookie to Thin Mints, our #1 bestseller,” “the raspberry kind,” as it is sure to nearly always be called, is an online only offering this Girl Scout cookie season.

So is it worth it?

If you like raspberry-flavored things, or the concept of a Thin Mint but inexplicably find mint to be disagreeable, the answer is yes, you’ll probably like this cookie.

The cookie itself is indistinguishable in appearance and construct from its minty sister. The outside of the thin cookie is the slightly waxy (yet delicious) “chocolaty” coating that you will recognize if you’re a connoisseur of Girl Scout cookies.

The inside, however, is where things get crazy. Instead of the near-black wafer of a Thin Mint, you’re blasted with a vivid pink middle. The artificial raspberry flavor is strong upon the first bite and grows stronger still as you consume. It’s almost *too* much, and I say this as an unapologetic fan of most artificial fruit flavoring.

And really, that’s the tale of the Raspberry Rally — it is a Thin Mint, only raspberry flavored. Very strong raspberry flavoring, though. It’s worth a go if you like fruity chocolate cookies or are a Girl Scout cookie completist, but I don’t know that I’ll feel compelled to buy an entire box each season. You know, unless it means my daughter is only one box away from a $300 eraser in the shape of a bee.

Purchased Price: $6.00
Size: 9 oz box
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (4 cookies) 160 calories, 8 grams of total fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 90 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of total carbs, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 10 grams of total sugar, and 2 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Reese’s Dipped Animal Crackers

I wasn’t planning on writing about these Reese’s Dipped Animal Crackers, but after getting sent some and devouring a bag about five minutes after opening it, I felt compelled to let people know how awesome they are.

These have been available for several weeks, and when I first learned about them, I rolled my eyes and said out loud to myself, “ANOTHER Reese’s product that probably doesn’t remind me of Reese’s at all.” From what I’ve noticed, when it comes to most products that are Reese’s branded, besides the actual candies, they have a more generic peanut butter and chocolate flavor. They don’t scream Reese’s. They scream an opportunity to make some money with the Reese’s name.

But after one bite of these Reese’s Dipped Animal Crackers, they made me shut my mouth because they proved me wrong, and it would be rude of me to chew these with my mouth open. I wouldn’t want any of this delectable snack to go flying out of my face.

Each animal cracker is dipped in a peanut butter-flavored candy, and then their bottom sides are dipped into milk chocolate. The peanut butter-flavored creme’s texture isn’t gritty like what’s inside a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup, Egg, Pumpkin, Tree, Mystery Shape, or whatever. It’s the same as the chocolate.

As for their flavor, saying they remind me of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups would be quite right. Instead, they’re more like Reese’s Eggs and Pumpkins, which I think have a slightly better peanut butter-to-chocolate ratio than the regular cups. Just having that flavor would’ve made an excellent product, but rumbling in soon after the sweet and salty hit my taste buds is the rattling crunch from the animal crackers. It’s a better crunch than ANYTHING Reese’s has stuffed into a peanut butter cup. And that cracker’s flavor doesn’t distract from the taste of the candy coatings.

While they have great flavor and texture, even with a barely passing grade in intro college zoology, I can’t tell what animals are coated in chocolate and peanut butter-flavored candy. Is it a bear? It could also be a rock with legs. Is it a lion? It could also be a rock with legs. They’re all mystery blobs to me. But who cares about that because this is the Best Reese’s Product That Isn’t Completely A Candy I’ve ever had.

Again, these have been out for weeks, so I imagine many of you have already tried them. But if you’re like me and haven’t because you pooh-poohed them, you should give them a chance because I woo-hoo them.

DISCLOSURE: I received free product samples from Hershey’s. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 4.25 oz bag
Purchased at: N/A
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (4 pieces) 150 calories, 7 grams of fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 70 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar (including 10 grams of added sugar), and 3 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Limited Edition The Most Oreo Oreo Cookies

Weird Al once brilliantly parodied the New Kids on the Block song, “The Right Stuff,” with an ode to the crème in the middle of an Oreo cookie. I’ll give you a second to ponder what the title of Al’s tune could’ve been.

Did you guess, “The White Stuff,” or did you know that already? If you did, then you also know, it’s a bop. The reason I’m bringing this up is to manifest a Super Bowl commercial in which Al and the “Kids” (Jordan, Donnie, Joshy… uh, I wanna say Boris? and, Skippy) unite to promote the newest Oreo. The biggest Oreo. The Most Oreo!

So, if anyone at Mondelez (more of this later) is reading this, there’s a golden Oreo idea for ya.

The Most Oreo is kinda like that ancient Xzibit meme in cookie form. “Yo dawg, we heard you liked Oreo cookies so we crushed up some Oreo and shoved them between an Oreo.” This one is pretty simple. Your thoughts on the Most Oreo will be dependent on how much you like Double Stuf Oreo, because these are essentially double stuffed Double Stuf.

These babies are thick. They’re so thick, they’re thicc with 2 “c’s,” and each “c” stands for “crème.” What you’re looking at is an Oreo with an almost inch wide layer of crème. That doesn’t sound like a lot, but lemme tell ya, it’s a lot. The crème is cookies-n-crème flavored, which just means it tastes like they pureed an Oreo and spread that between the chocolate wafers.

They’re very good and they’re exactly what you think. Each isolated frisbee of crème does have a cookies-n-crème flavor, but as a whole, it just tastes like an obese Oreo. It’s the Most Oreo!

Joey! Joey was a New Kid, not Joshy! Joshy is the Hydrox to Joey’s Oreo.

What was I talking about?

Oh right, the Most Oreo. I like them, but they’re still a little too “extra.” That’s a pretty lame complaint, but you assumed that, right? They’re like that theater kid you knew growing up. By all means, she was delightful… if not just a little extra. She was better in small doses.

Also, let’s be real, there’s nothing “creamy” about Oreo crème, and you really get that distinctly gritty texture here in droves. I did enjoy teeth scraping it out like an artichoke leaf though.

While I’m “complaining,” I don’t like the name. It’s too final. What if the market demands more of the most? Where do you go from there? Oops All Crème? Do they break form and make the cookies double wide? Can they possibly top “Most?!”

I guess the only important things are they’re good and the world needs that Super Bowl commercial.

I address Mondelez again, because they’re the only brand name on the bag. No Nabisco. Nabisco is a subsidiary of Mondelez, but since when has the name “Nabisco” been left off an Oreo package?

It doesn’t matter – Mondelez, you have less than one week to unite Weird Al Yankovic, Jordan, Donnie, Joey, Boris and everyone’s favorite, Skippy. Let’s make this a Super Bowl to remember.

I included a pic of a QR code that takes you into the Oreoverse, if you are so inclined. It’s just some mindless AR stuff, but maybe you can win something or find inner peace in the digital cookie landscape.

Purchased Price: $4.99
Size: 13.4 oz package
Purchased at: Shop Rite
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 Cookie) 110 calories, 5 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 50 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.