Greetings, true believers.

Are you ready for one of the biggest crossover events in comic history? Yes, even bigger than Archie vs. Predator! Maybe not quite as big as Godzilla vs. Charles Barkley, but still pretty big. It’s up there.

Earth’s mightiest heroes have assembled once again, but this time in sandwich cookie form for the new “Stuf of Legends.” They’ve made the jump from the printed page and the big screen onto… Oreo wafers.

Does that sound fun? Well, this might be the laziest issue of “What If” ever.

Stuf of Legends are just regular Oreos with a twist. Not the classic Oreo twist, you can still do that, but these cookies have a gray colored crème that turns blue. That’s essentially it. And here I thought heroes never dye.

Almost 90 years of creative inspiration to pull from the pages of Marvel Comics, and this is what they landed on. Ya know what? Fine. That’s fine. Excelsior!

Who am I to judge? I couldn’t muster even a few “creative” alternatives.

I was trying to think of some Marvel heroes that changed color, and… yeah, don’t bother Googling that, lest you want to hear the worst people’s stupid opinions on which Captain America is better. No, they didn’t ruin your childhood, MagnetoMike73.

Speaking of Cap, he’s joined by a couple dozen of his fellow heroes/anti-heroes/mutants/robots/aliens/I think one dude is just a regular non-powered guy – the whole gang’s here embossed on the cookies, which I guess is the ultimate selling point. It’s cool, but I still wish they did something more interesting flavor-wise.

I took a picture of all the characters and team logos represented in my pack. Feel free to see if you can name them all. Hint – they’re all Skrulls!

Do you want me to review an Oreo? These taste exactly the same, although I do believe they are slightly dryer. Perhaps it’s the gray crème with the little white thumbprint of it all.

As far as the crème goes, I dipped it and also did the typical untwist-and-lick technique, and the gray-to-blue transition was uninspired at best. If I had to rank these amongst the myriad of Oreo variants we’ve seen in the past decade, I’d say they are about a Thor: Love in Thunder out of Avengers: Infinity War. I still like ’em, but they aren’t going near the top.

While the imagery of the blue crème doesn’t exactly pop off the page, it did make my mouth extremely blue – not even Beast blue, I’m talking navy Nightcrawler blue. I spared you all the pic of my disgusting maw. They didn’t even really turn the milk blue, which I assume was intentional, so as to not run into brand confusion with Disney’s other rapidly declining blockbuster property.

So, we’ve got dressed up O.G. Oreos in one of three “collectable” bags, with various, almost indecipherable characters chiseled on the cookies. They’re worth picking up as a one-time purchase if you’re a fan of the MCU – Mondelez Cookie Umbrella.

That said, if you don’t care, skip ’em. The blue isn’t fun enough to warrant what I fear is coming next. As Uncle Ben says, “With blue power comes green… well, you know.”

Cute, but hopefully DC and Hydrox cook up something a little more creative.

Purchased Price: $4.97
Size: 10.68 oz package
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 Cookies) 140 calories, 7 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 90 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.

Winter can be a dreary time of year, and everyone could use a little more to celebrate; maybe that’s why so many brands have been debuting confetti-flavored snacks recently. It seems like every time I blink, a new novelty Oreo has been released, so of course, the beloved brand’s take on the trend couldn’t be far behind. But its new Confetti Cake offering isn’t a regular cookie, it’s a Cakester: the spin-off treat that retains the iconic “sandwich” concept but swaps out cookies for cakes and the traditional crème for a fluffier layer more akin to frosting.

Perhaps I have been conditioned to associate packaged sweets with “cake” in the name with Hostess Cupcakes—or perhaps I was just bamboozled by the enticingly ginormous picture on the box and missed the conveniently tiny “enlarged to show detail” disclaimer—but even though I’ve had Oreo Cakesters before, I was expecting these to be larger. They’re about the circumference of a standard Oreo, but each Cakester is plumper and more substantial than the flat cookies, so they’re not too tiny.

Classic confetti cake is a vanilla cake with vanilla frosting and rainbow sprinkles, so those flavors are replicated here. All the vanilla gives the Cakesters a strong aroma that overwhelmed me as soon as I opened a pack; unsurprisingly, they tasted very strongly of vanilla and were very sweet. They’re in the “soft baked” style, and while that gives them a consistently smooth texture, I find it often comes with a vaguely synthetic aftertaste as well (though that seemed less noticeable with these than in the standard Golden Oreo Cakesters). The cake is so dense that when I bit in, it didn’t leave any crumbs. In fact, my mouthful was pretty dry, so it’s a good thing that the generously applied filling, which oozes over the edges in its abundance, added some much-needed creaminess.

According to the package, the filling is “birthday cake flavor crème,” but visually it just looks like vanilla. I really can’t find a more precise word for the flavor than the one I already used: sweet, sweet, sweet! Sure, that could describe “birthday cake flavor,” but it could also describe… vanilla. Maybe it’s just dramatic marketing language? That would fit in well with the rest of the box, which proudly proclaims, “CAKE MEETS OREO… IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST BITE”. Alleged crème flavor and loud, all-caps declarations aside, the only other way these were visibly different from the Golden Oreo Cakesters was the rainbow sprinkles. They didn’t have much taste, but they excelled at what I assume to be their main jobs: a) creating a nice crunch and b) looking pretty and fun.

Ultimately, though, while they are visually cute and taste alright, I found Oreo Cakesters Confetti Cake to be a little lackluster. They made me crave either freshly baked cake or a basic Oreo, and unfortunately, their in-between nature didn’t fully satisfy either desire (even though the box declares “HAVE YOUR CAKE AND COOKIE, TOO”). They’re worth a shot if you can find them, but despite their festive name, don’t expect them to be the life of your party.

Purchased Price: $5.59
Size: 10.1 oz box/5 packs of two
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 pack) 260 calories, 13 grams of fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 36 grams of carbohydrates, 21 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

Ugh! Just give us an Oreo and Chips Ahoy mashup already, Nabisco!

Not doing that is a big miss, yo! Can you imagine all the ridiculous clickbait-y titles that would spawn from a major snack announcement like that?

“Oreo and Chips Ahoy Create A Mind-Blowing Cookie That I Need In My Life Right Now or Else My Life is Ruined”

“Two Iconic Nabisco Brands Give Birth To A Cookie Baby That I Want To Hug With My Mouth”

“This Chips Ahoy and Oreo Mashup Will Make Me Set Up A Ring Alarm System Around My Cookie Jar”

Instead, we get the next sandwich cookie in the Oreo Cookie Dough Choco Chip Trilogy that began in 2014 with the original Cookie Dough Oreo, continued in 2016 with the Choco Chip Oreo, and ended recently with the return of the Cookie Dough Oreo, except instead of the chocolate wafers that the original had, it comes with the chocolate chip cookie-looking wafers that came with the 2016 version.

However, the creme’s flavor also seems slightly different from the 2014 version, which had a noticeable coffee-like flavor. With the creme in this, I taste a slight brown sugar flavor, a hint of chocolate, and a bit of marshmallow in the aftertaste. That sounds like an absolutely winning combination, but I found this sandwich cookie to be lacking a crazy delicious flavor that would put it in the upper echelon of limited edition Oreo varieties.

While a decent tasting Oreo, I think the chocolate flavor needs to be amped up a bit. It’s so mild that it makes the cookie dough image on the packaging seem misleading. The chocolate makes a huge difference in what makes chocolate chip cookie dough so good, but it’s too bad that these Oreos don’t really offer that in the creme or wafers.

This updated version of Cookie Dough Oreo is not a flavor that makes me want to stuff a row down my cookie hole in one sitting. I’ve had the package for over a week, and I still have one-third of it left. Maybe a decade from now, there will be another reboot of the cookie. Or, even better, an Oreo and Chips Ahoy collaboration.

That would be a mondo-lez mashup, Mondelez!

Purchased Price: $6.19*
Size: 10.68 oz package
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) 140 calories, 6 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 75 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar (including 12 grams of added sugar), and less than 1 gram of protein.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.