REVIEW: Limited Edition Chocolate Strawberry Oreo Cookies

Limited Edition Chocolate Strawberry Oreo Cookies

Two years ago, on a hazy New Year’s morning (my birthday), my girlfriend woke me up with a package of Birthday Cake Oreo in bed, and the secret junk food junkie in me silently screamed with joy.

Now, thanks to the cookie scientists at Nabisco, I can return the favor to my one true love on Valentine’s Day with the Limited Edition Chocolate Strawberry Oreo. Whether or not a crinkly package of factory cookies can successfully replace four-dollars-a-pop chocolate-covered strawberries remains to be seen, but whether or not these Oreo’s are a decent start to the pending onslaught of 2017’s limited offerings can be laid to rest right now.

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The Oreo cookies look no different than the always available chocolate flavor, with a dark creme sandwiched between two classic wafer cookies; but the aroma is distinctly different and heavy on the strawberry. Something about the chocolate strawberry smell is immediately nostalgic, channeling Neapolitan ice cream sandwiches, kiddy cereal, and strawberry Pocky sticks. While it is definitely an artificial fruit smell, it is not too perfumey or cloying in any way.

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Digging into the cookies, the strong strawberry smell is put on the back burner as chocolate takes the more dominant role in overall flavor, which makes sense as the chocolate outweighs the strawberry components 2-to-1. The textures of the chocolate and strawberry cremes are exactly the same, which mixes the two flavors together in a way that is cohesive but ultimately not too special.

There’s nothing off-putting about the fruit flavor like the strange Swedish Fish Oreo, but there’s also nothing particularly new or unique, like the slightly differing textures in the Filled Cupcake Oreo.

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A chocolate covered strawberry, as the design of the package directly implies, should have a more strawberry-forward flavor, and while these cookies do a good job of conveying both elements, the ratios and authenticity feel a bit off.

They’re a tasty crunchy cookie that will definitely be agreeable to most average palates but don’t provide any level of satisfaction that the original Oreo have delivered for over 100 years (literally). I’m not sure my Valentine’s chocolate thirst will be satiated with these come February 14, so I may have to go back to dropping $30 at Godiva to show how much I truly care.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 60 calories from fat, 6 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 90 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein..)

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 10.7 oz. package
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Full choco-strawberry aroma. Not too artificial tasting. Hey, it’s an Oreo.
Cons: Not enough genuine strawberry flavor. Not enough contrast, too much chocolate. Will not replace expensive Valentine’s Day candy.

REVIEW: Nabisco Oreo Thins Tiramisu Cookies (Korea)

Nabisco Oreo Thins Tiramisu Cookies

I love Oreo Thins.

I’ve said statements like that publicly and when I’m alone with a package in my kitchen, serenading it with the Peyton Manning Nationwide Insurance commercial jingle melody.

Oreo Thins, you taste so good.

I also like to order tiramisu whenever I’m not full or tired from eating large amounts of carbohydrates at Italian chain restaurants like Romano’s Macaroni Grill and Bucca di Beppo.

For those of you unfamiliar with the Italian desert, it features coffee dipped ladyfingers; layers of an eggs, sugar, and mascarpone cheese mixture; is flavored with cocoa; and may contain rum. It’s light, it has a fun name to say in a sexy voice, and it’s delicious.

So including a tiramisu-flavored creme in an Oreo Thins Cookie looks like a slam dunk or a home run. But, surprisingly, it was not. It was an air ball or an inning-ending 6-4-3 double play with the bases loaded when (insert your team here) is down one run in the bottom of the ninth inning in Game 7 of the World Series. Okay, maybe not that soul crushing.

Actually, my disappointment with these began before I even tasted one. I thought these would’ve been nice if they had the soft cookie of Oreo Cakesters (remember those), which would’ve matched the actual dessert’s texture.

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The tiramisu-flavored creme tastes very similar to the Italian dessert. It’s got the coffee, the cocoa, and I detect a little bit of alcohol flavor. But the thing is, when eaten whole, the creme is in the background while the chocolate wafer dominates the cookie’s flavor.

That’s typical with the Oreo Thins varieties and it’s the reason why I sing to them when we’re alone. That ratio makes them less sweet and allows me to easily pop them into my mouth one after another like potato chips. But I really wanted the tiramisu to shine, which it doesn’t. Perhaps, this flavor would’ve been better as a regular Oreo.

These Oreo Thins Tiramisu Cookies are okay. Are they good enough that you should buy a box from an eBay seller in another country since these cookie aren’t available in the U.S.? Well, if they’re not tasty enough for me to serenade, then they’re not good enough.

Purchased Price: $6.00
Size: 84 g box/2 sleeves of 7 cookies
Purchased at: eBay
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 sleeve) 220 kcal, 11 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 140 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 15 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein

REVIEW: Limited Edition Swedish Fish Oreo Cookies

Limited Edition Swedish Fish Oreo Cookies

“Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should.”

Dr. Ian Malcolm famously spoke this line in Jurassic Park, and ever since, it echoes in my brain whenever a particularly weird, strange, or repulsive snack food is released. But I bet even Dr. Malcolm would choose an ocean cruise in a plesiosaur’s stomach over a tall stack of Swedish Fish Oreo Cookies. Nabisco might as well have printed the word “WHY?” on the side of every wafer.

But I plan to eat these Oreo cookies with an open mind. Why?

Because I may not be a Jurassic paleontologist, but I am a self-described gummy-ologist. I’ve documented every species of gummy bear. I once caught a 30-pound blue gummy shark with a single gummy worm. Heck, I even rallied for gummy octopus rights when I discovered their intelligence was nearly on par with humans.

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But Swedish Fish Oreos are an entirely different creature. Even though they have Oreo’s iconic, pleasantly crunchy, and cocoa buttery chocolate cookie wafers, Swedish Fish Oreo have a unique creme filling the world hasn’t tasted since the Paleozoic era.

Or so I’m assuming, since the decision to make Swedish Fish Oreo could’ve only been made by either a Neanderthal or a giant roulette wheel in Nabisco’s office.

See, this creme isn’t perfectly pillowy, soft, and squishy. It’s a little more sticky, chewy, and dare I say…slimy. It cracks and falls apart like a child’s Play-Doh diorama of the Berlin Wall, and each Oreo I opened contained a different Rorschach test image in its pasty folds. Below I see Donald Trump angrily looking out a castle window:

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The creme’s taste, though, is just like Swedish Fish. It has potent, puckering pops of candied cherry and a slightly off-putting finish of waxy gelatin. I could probably recreate it with a box of Swedish Fish and a blender, but like shooting fish in a barrel, eating fish in an Oreo is way easier.

I can’t say if it’s more pleasant, though. Eating the cookie and creme together, I can really only taste the overpowering cherry creme. There’s a processed chocolate aftertaste, but even then, it has to battle for supremacy with the cherry cough syrup layer that the creme plastered on the back of my throat.

I really wanted to like Swedish Fish Oreo, but the “crispy fruit medicine puree” textural contrast is too much for even a quasi-licensed gummy-ologist. I thought dunking them might intensify the chocolate flavor, but I worried that dipping these bizarre things in milk might make the beverage renounce Oreo as its favorite cookie.

So since I already felt ridiculous, I dipped ‘em in Kool-Aid instead.

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Surprisingly, it wasn’t even bad. When soggy, the cocoa wafers are “activated,” and the whole Oreo starts to taste like a vaguely pleasant Dirt Pie.

Remember Dirt Pies? Those chocolate pudding cups with scattered Oreo crumb soil and gummy worms on top? The desserts you haven’t had since your cousin’s 4th grade Halloween party? They’re delicious, and after squinting my eyes and eating a juice-soaked Swedish Fish Oreo, I relived a little of that nostalgia.

For 99 percent of people, these cookies will be a major “no.” The texture’s weird, the flavor’s medicinal, and the smell would scare a coyote. But for those rare one percent who are eternal kids-at-heart and want to scratch a doozy off their “Culinary Adventure Bucket List,” then oh boy, does Nabisco have an Oreo for you.

As for me? I’m just gonna lay down and dream about Dirt Pies for a week.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 10.7 oz package
Purchased at: Kroger
Rating: 3 out of 10
Pros: Wistful Dirt Pie memories. Completing my Gummy Pokédex. Cookie creme ink blot tests. Googling pictures of plesiosaurs to cleanse my palate.
Cons: Chemical cherry fish paste. Chocolate flavor that disappears faster than Houdini. Scraping the bottom of the flavor idea fish barrel. “Oreo: Milk’s Recently Divorced Cookie.” The falling Frankenstein piñata that broke my nose at my cousin’s 4th grade Halloween party.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Choco Chip Oreo Cookies

Limited Edition Choco Chip Oreo Cookies

Sometime during the 1920s, amidst the green oak pines of St. Lambert Country Club in Quebec, a wealthy hotel mogul by the name of David Mulligan tightened his knickers, squared up to the tee, drew his driver back, and proceeded to hit a golf ball directly into a sand trap—on an adjacent hole.

“Shiitake mushroom!” he exclaimed, realizing there were ladies nearby and wishing to abstain from obscenities. “I do believe I shall need a correction shot for that one!”

“Another one!?!” his friend, Rupert T. Bosworth Esquire III bellowed. “My, you take so many correction shots they ought to just call them mulligans!”

And so the common term for a do-over was born.

Food companies don’t often get mulligans —- at least not as many as the U.S. golfers admit to taking. But then again, companies don’t really deserve second chances, if you ask me. If you’re paying people to engineer delicious, they damn well better engineer delicious the first time around. That or they need a really good reason to try a flavor again.

In the case of Cookie Dough Oreo Cookies, I’m glad Oreo took a mulligan. It’s not that the 2014 limited edition cookie was bad, but rather that it should have been called “Caramel Latte” Oreos. Such was the intensity of the coffee flavor. But when it came to pure, unadulterated, E. coli-be-damned cookie dough madness, well, Cookie Dough Oreo left a lot to be desired.

The new Limited Edition Choco Chip Oreo leave far less to be desired. This is a cookie that blurs the line between sandwich cookie and chocolate chip cookie like no other, capturing the very best of packaged chocolate chip cookie flavor without forcing you to stop in front of the Chips Ahoy! display and ponder the question chewy or original?

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The “choco chip” cookie base, an entirely new conception for Oreo, is crunchy and balanced, with notes of brown sugar and tiny bursts of chocolate. It’s not the greatest representation of a chocolate chip cookie we’ve ever seen in packaged form, but it has a sort of dippable appeal that I’d compare to a chocolate chip Teddy Graham or those old Nabisco Chips Ahoy! 100-calorie pack cookie thins.

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Speaking of dippable –- yeah, that’s where the creme center comes in. Where traditional Oreo creme is a bit stiff and grainy, the choco chip cookie creme has a frosting-like smoothness and viscosity to go along with a strong burst of sweetness and an aftertaste of molasses and brown sugar. On its own it’s a bit too sweet, but taken in a complete bite with the crunchy wafer, it’s like chomping down on a cookie dough stuffed cookie.

There’s no coffee flavors, and unlike the sometimes disjointed bite of the Cookie Dough Oreo, where the chocolate wafer and coffee creme competed, the flavor of the Choco Chip Oreo is pure chocolate chip cookie. The only downside is predictable: there’s only so much buttery and eggy richness that can be stuffed inside a shelf-stable 14-ounce cookie.

Choco Chip Oreo Cookies aren’t a hole in one, but I’m okay with that. Sometimes you just gotta admire a straight drive down the fairway, and be content with very good. I mean, it could be worse. You could be eating coffee-flavored cookies out of a sand trap or something. So thank you, Mr. Mulligan, for sucking at golf. This Oreo redo is for you.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 25 milligrams of cholesterol, 65 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, 0 gram of dietary fiber, 15 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein..)

Purchased Price: $2.98
Size: 10.7 oz package
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Chocolate chip cookie dough meets Duncan Hines frosting. Much more authentic chocolate chip cookie flavor than Cookie Dough Oreo. Second chances in the cookie aisle.
Cons: A bit too sweet. Both the wafer and filling lack eggy and buttery richness. What the fudge is “choco” anyway?

REVIEW: Limited Edition Blueberry Pie Oreo Cookies

Limited Edition Blueberry Pie Oreo Cookies

I imagine there are some of you out there who are absolutely sick of all these limited edition Oreo flavors. You’ve probably left a comment on someone’s Facebook post about a new Oreo variety that was somewhere along the lines of “Enough with the Oreo flavors” or “Oreo needs to stop” or “OreOh no, not moreo Oreos.”

But think of the food scientists who develop these flavors. Oreo is the canvas on which they can use natural and artificial flavors to unleash their creativity. Would you take away a paintbrush from Van Gogh? Would you cut the strings in Beethoven’s piano? Would you smash Hemingway’s typewriter with a sledgehammer? Would you take Chicago away from Dick Wolf?

Without the Oreo cookie, some food scientists might have less fun jobs to do, like coming up with new ways for Nature Valley to use granola or trying to shoehorn Kashi’s seven whole grains into something edible.

The latest flavor that’ll make Oreo haters roll their eyes is Limited Edition Blueberry Pie.

The cookie combines the graham-flavored wafer that comes with S’mores, Strawberry Shortcake, and Key Lime Pie Oreo cookies with a Violet Beauregard-colored blueberry creme.

These aren’t the first blueberry Oreo cookies to enter my mouth. I’ve had blueberry ice cream flavored Oreo cookies from Asia that used chocolate wafers. While they were good, they didn’t make me instantly call Nabisco’s Customer Service line and demand the company bring blueberry Oreo cookies to the U.S. But these Blueberry Pie Oreo Cookies make me want to call the Nabisco Customer Service line and demand they never leave shelves or send me a signed letter from the current Mondelez CEO promising they’ll be back next year.

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While I’ve never had a blueberry pie with a graham cracker crust, I’ve mostly had the lattice top ones depicted on the front of the packaging, this Oreo makes me pie-curious. Now I must try a blueberry pie with a graham cracker crust, because I think these are the best fruit-flavored Oreo cookies so far.

The slightly tart blueberry flavor reminds me of what I’d get from a blueberry pie, muffin, scone, or (insert baked good here). Good job, food scientists! The graham-flavored wafers do a great job of complementing the creme. They go together like Cagney & Lacey, Norm & Cliff, and Ren & Stimpy. The wafers don’t heavily dampen the creme’s flavor and there’s the same level of graham flavor as there would be a crust flavor in an actual blueberry pie. It’s a great combination and one that’s surprising because of my previous blueberry Oreo experience.

But there are two minor issues. Even though, these are wonderful cookies, the image of the lattice top pie on the packaging doesn’t represent what the cookies taste like. Also, these are currently available only at Target for a limited time. But again, minor issues.

Overall, I think these Limited Edition Blueberry Pie Oreo Cookies are good enough to make new Oreo flavor haters still hate new Oreo flavors. Yes, haters are going to still hate no matter what. But if you’re a fan of blueberry baked goods, I think you’ll love these.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 65 milligrams of sodium, 15 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 10.7 oz.
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: Blueberry flavor reminds me of baked goods. My favorite fruit-flavored Oreo cookie. Letting food scientists be creative. Creme and wafers are a great combination. Wafer doesn’t mute the creme’s flavor much.
Cons: Limited edition Oreo haters are gonna to hate these. Blueberry haters are gonna hate these. Limited edition. Available only at Target.