ANNOUNCEMENT: New Impulsive Buy Reviewer Dan

As I looked myself in the mirror this morning, I threw on my best Eastwood impression and gruffly asked myself:

“Do ya feel impulsive? Well, do ya, punk?”

Having done so, I felt confident enough to introduce myself here to you all. So hello, fellow Oreo orators, Yoo-hoo gurus, and savants of all things savory; I’m Dan! And despite the reference above, please don’t call me “Dirty Dan.” It’s hard enough to make friends when all I talk about is fruit snacks, waffle tacos, and the like. Instead, feel free to do what others do and go with just Dan, Dan the Man (though I wonder if they really think I’m the man, or if they just say it because it rhymes) or my personal favorite: Raisin Dan Crunch.

As a sprightly university student, I study advertising with hopes of some day working in—you guessed it—the dynamic and creative field of food advertising. Where is my base of operations, you ask? Right in the good ol’ mitten-shaped, Great Lake-loving, Canada-hugging state of Michigan, of course! Here, regional favorites like Vernors and Faygo “pop” (soda is a foreign word to me), as well as Better Made and ketchup chips have fostered a lifelong love in me for offbeat junk foods.

Yes, while other kids bragged of sports and party conquests, I was the one shouting, “Hey guys! Have you seen this green ketchup?” And for better or worse, this passion has stuck with me.

If I could be said to have a “specialty,” it would have to be breakfast cereals. With a signed letter from Cap’n Crunch on my wall and a mail ordered box of South Korean Oreo O’s at my side, every part of my day is “part of this complete breakfast.”

And it is this very love of cereal, chips, cookies, and more that I hope to share with you all here. So I’d like to raise a toast, or at least some French Toast Crunch, through thick and thin…and through ruffled, waffle-cut and kettle-cooked, let’s all snack together!

8 thoughts to “ANNOUNCEMENT: New Impulsive Buy Reviewer Dan”

  1. A fellow Michigander! How ’bout that.

    Vernors and Faygo is where its at.. until Faygo started slipping in artificial sweetners. Bah. I miss you, Rock ‘n Rye.

  2. Welcome Dan! Im a Michigan native who was transplanted to Florida when I was just a little girl. Some of my greatest memories involve my grandma making her twice yearly trek down here, her car loaded down with: giant cartons of Better Made chips, jars and jars of Sanders hot fudge, Vernors, and Strohs beer for my dad. We’d have to ration it all out to make it last 6 months. Pre-internet, obviously! Its amazing how many memories are rooted in what we ate as kids!

    1. Bahh, how could I forget Sanders! I’m ashamed of myself, but thanks for reminding me. I’ll punish myself by eating a shame sundae. Oh, now that reminds me of another Michigan favorite: Superman ice cream!

  3. You have to be my favorite new reviewer thus far. A man (or….a Dan?) who shares my same infatuation with cereal automatically has my heart and stomach. My skin crusts Frosted Flakes when it’s dry and I’m fluent in Alpha-Bits. I know we’d be GREEEEEEAAAAAAAT in the kitchen at 7 AM, defying the laws that cereal is just for kids and mourn the loss of Nesquick cereal.

  4. Welcome, Raisin Dan Crunch! (I have to say, that quite tickled my knickers.) Your obsession with snacks has brought you to just the right place. Looking forward to your reviews!

  5. Knows the proper term for a soft drink.

    Knows what Vernors is.

    Seems legit.

  6. Welcome Lieutenant Dan!
    I decided to go rogue there because you can’t choose your own nickname

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