The Impulsive Buy

REVIEW: Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Bag

I don’t believe I put forth a good showing in my Mystery Flavor Twizzlers review.

I tried to solve that flavor conundrum to no avail for days, and it left me a broken man.

I vowed to leave the snack detective game, never to return! I retired my houndstooth hat, my magnifying glass, and wait… Sour Patch Kids has a new mystery flavor?!

Just when I thought I was out, they pulled me back in!

Ok so, unlike the typical bright and vibrant Sour Patch Kids, these mystery pieces are all white. I tried my best not to let that somehow influence my guess.

As we all know, Sour Patch Kids are sour before they’re sweet. These took extra long to get to the latter. The typical sour sugar punch felt especially pronounced this time around.

Once the sour crystals melted away, I was left with a shockingly mild sweetness. I was instantly stumped and starting to regret my decision to return to the mystery game. I don’t really know how to describe the flavor other than “confectionary.” I know that’s a broad description, but it tasted more in line with a flavor you’d get in a pastry than the usual fruity Sour Patch fare.

My initial instinct was mild coconut, but then realized I broke my rule and let the color influence my guess, so I settled on… banana, which is also white. Maybe the color actually is a hint?

The flavor isn’t strong at all. It’s tasty, but it’s far and away the weakest Sour Patch flavor I’ve ever had. I think I might be right with banana, but if you wanted to tell me there might be something like vanilla, or marshmallow, or the aforementioned coconut, I’d believe it. Pina Colada? Maybe? Some kind of multi-ingredient dessert concoction? That seems more like a Jelly Belly thing than Sour Patch, no?

Unlike Twizzlers, these Sour Patch Kids came with clues on the bag. My bag had one, and I was able to snap a pic of a different hint as well.

“It gives laughs and can be a riot, cause when it flies nobody’s silent.”

“Across the pond it has a different name, but there’s an extra ingredient in the game.”

Putting aside the fact these hints stink, I landed on Banana Cream Pie.

I would say the first hint means some clown is hilariously throwing a pie, and while this is happening, everyone else is making a ruckus and laughing up a storm.

The second hint makes a little more sense. In the UK, a banana cream pie is called “Dame Madeline’s Stupendous Yellow and White,” and as we all know, the extra ingredient is baked beans. It’s an acquired taste, but is it the flavor of these Mystery Kids?

Ya know what? I’m stumped again. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this snack detective game. Don’t hire me to find your lost donut.

I’m saying it’s probably banana, maybe banana cream pie, and I’m also saying that despite being hard to decipher and pretty weak, they taste just fine. I’m gonna be super bummed if these are just another in the long line of “birthday cake” flavored snacks. Am I overlooking the Kids’ birthday?

You can buy Mystery bags or regular Sour Patch Kid bags with some mystery flavored pieces mixed in, but be warned, the OG flavors will dwarf the mystery flavor.

You can submit your guess on their website, but if you somehow win with “Dame Madeline’s Stupendous Yellow and White,” you owe me a cut of that $50k prize. I want at least $3! I accept Venmo, Paypal, and whatever crypto is hot at that precise moment.

Best of luck with your guesses!

Purchased Price: $2.89
Size: 8 oz.
Purchased at: 7-11
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (12 pieces) 110 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 15 milligrams of sodium, 27 grams of total carbohydrates, 23 grams of sugars, 0 grams of fiber, 0 grams of protein.

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