REVIEW: Burger King Spider-Verse Whopper

Burger King, Burger King
Get a load of this burger thing,
Crimson bun, Whopper-sized,
Order with a side of fries,

Look out!
Here’s the…
New “Spider-verse” Whopper.

Yeah, that ended with a whimper. Sorry, the lyrics aren’t as clever as BK’s current theme song, WHOPPER, WHOPPER, WHOPPER, WHOPPER, WHOPPER *repeat x10*

Before I review Burger King’s new “Spider-verse” Whopper, I just wanna give my quick review of 2018’s “Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse.” 10 out of 10. Certified banger. Best Spider-man movie ever made. No notes. If you haven’t seen it, find whoever is streaming it, and fire it up.

While you’re at it, flame broil up Burger King’s new “Spider-verse” Whopper, a burger that somehow almost lived up to the hype of the movie.

I say “somehow” because, in reality, there isn’t much difference from a tried-and-true Whopper here, but that’s the thing, reality is only a perception. This is a multiverse Whopper.

The obvious eye-catching draw of this burger is the beet-dyed red bun. As far as “photo versus expectations” goes, I gotta say, the real thing ended up looking way better than my Spidey sense thought it would. It tastes like a normal bun, but I swear it was a bit more “toothsome.” Perhaps mine was just mildly stale, like the current Marvel Cinematic Universe. (Sony paid me to say that.)

The other key difference from a standard Whopper is that American cheese is swapped out for melty Swiss. Why? I pondered that myself. Is Miles Morales a big fan of Swiss cheese? Is there a Swiss Spiderman out there in the Spider-verse? The only logical explanation I could come up with is that Swiss cheese famously has holes and the Spidey supervillain The Spot has a key role in the new Spider-verse sequel. I think I cracked the case. (Trypophobics need not Google “The Spot.”)

Anyway, I actually think the Swiss compliments the burger really well. It gave it a milder and slightly saltier taste than the usual Kraft single-esque piece of rubber.

It’s been a long time since I’ve sat down and eaten a Whopper AT the home of said Whopper, and I enjoyed it thoroughly.

I do have one minor complaint though. Why did Burger King just stop at a red bun? It has dabbled with flavored buns and hot sauces in the past. I think this bun should have had a *THWIP!* of heat, or there should have been a sauce component. They could have called it “Radioactive Spider-bite Sauce” or something. Then again, maybe it’s best to limit the number of spider references. Some people might think they’re eating bugs.

Either way, I love the movie, I really liked this burger, and I can’t wait to watch the sequel next week. You have until June 11th to try the burger. After that, it’ll be gone like Uncle Ben – the rice guy and Peter Parker’s dearly departed guardian.

Oh, there are also cool little Miles Morales-themed Burger King crowns. I won’t lie; I snagged one. Two. I snagged two. I’m giving one away, I swear.

This was fun. Maybe next time BK can do a Venom-themed burger with black buns and … oh wait, no! No, they can’t do that again, lest they want everyone to expel their own symbiote.

Ok, on that gross note, I’m gonna websling outta here. Try the burger!

Purchased Price: $5.00 (Special Monday only price in the App – a steep $8.19 otherwise)
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 795 calories, 54 grams of fat, 14 grams of saturated fat, 2 grams of trans fat, 115 milligrams of cholesterol, 1700 milligrams of sodium, 56 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 38 grams of protein.

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