Category: Reviews

REVIEW: Jimmy John’s Frenchie

Mike 12 Comments

Jimmy John s Frenchie

What is the Jimmy John’s Frenchie?

Jimmy John’s vaguely problematically-named “Frenchie” sandwich contains salami, capicola, provolone, and salted butter on a thinner version of its standard French bread. They’re premade in limited quantities each day, so plan on an early lunch if you want to be sure to get one.

How is it?

As the name suggests, the Frenchie is Jimmy John’s take the popular French jamon-beurre sandwich. I went to a fancy culinary school, and speak culinary French, and so can tell you that jamon-beurre means ham-butter. (That’s not true. The only language skills I picked up during my time working in restaurants was to answer to “Oi! Pinche pendejo!”). As the name suggests, it’s a straightforward sandwich of ham and butter on a baguette, which requires all three elements to be of top quality for it to work.

Jimmy John s Frenchie Side

I’m a fan of Jimmy John’s, but its ingredients aren’t up to the task. The bread is soft with a nice bite to its crust, but it doesn’t have the chew and crackling crust of a great French baguette. The cold cuts and cheese are better than Subway’s, but you could find the same in your grocer’s deli. I’m not looking for the Frenchie to transport me to a café in Paris, but without really top-quality ingredients this is a fairly plain sandwich.

Jimmy John s Frenchie Meats and Cheeses

Jimmy John’s tries to overcome this shortcoming by replacing the traditional ham with salami and capicola, but neither stands out, neither adding nor subtracting from the sandwich, making me think they should’ve simply stuck with ham.

Is there anything else you need to know?

The only ingredient Jimmy John’s added to their menu for this sandwich is the salted butter. For some, this may not seem enough to justify a whole new sandwich, but as a Wisconsin native, I must disagree. The home of the Butter Burger knows that butter can improve any recipe. I had a friend in grade school who had peanut butter and butter sandwiches for lunch every day. We like butter so much that we once outlawed margarine. Though I was generally disappointed in the Frenchie, the butter adds a salted richness that serves to meld the flavors is a pleasing way.

Conclusion:

The Frenchie is a good option if someone is looking for a few simple ingredients combined in a satisfying arrangement. Fans of the franchise’s “Plain Slim” options with only meat and cheese may find something to like. Others will be better served by ordering something else, unless they really like butter. Now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s time for the annual butter sculpture eating contest.

Purchased Price: $4.99
Size: N/A
Purchased at: Jimmy John’s
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 760 calories, 34 grams of fat, 17 grams of saturated fat, 115 milligrams of cholesterol, 2130 milligrams of sodium, 75 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 2 grams of sugar, and 37 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Heinz Kranch Saucy Sauce

Meghan 3 Comments

Heinz Kranch Saucy Sauce

What is Heinz Kranch Saucy Sauce?

Standing proudly as Heinz’s latest crazy condiment mashup, this special saucy sauce combines two of America’s favorite condiments – ketchup and ranch dressing – and puts them into a single, convenient squeeze bottle.

How is it?

As much as I loved the taste and novelty of Mayochup, I can’t seem to get behind Kranch in the same way. On the surface, both agglomerations sound like solid, if not slightly-too-similar ideas. Mayonnaise is an integral ingredient in ranch dressing, and both spreads have long-standing reputations as all-purpose accoutrements.

The problem is that Kranch’s practical applications are much more limited than Mayochup’s. I like ketchup. I like ranch. Even so, I can’t think of many foods I would enjoy with both ketchup and ranch.

Heinz Kranch Saucy Sauce Plated

Although Kranch doesn’t taste bad, per se, I could never figure out a single food I liked it on. It was too ketchup-esque to use as a dip for fresh veggies, but also too much like salad dressing to make a good sidekick for chicken nuggets and alphabet fries. I didn’t like it as salad dressing and thought it made a terrible sandwich spread.

Heinz Kranch Saucy Sauce Chicken Nugget

Is there anything else you should know?

Since this is now Heinz’s fourth take on mixing condiments that everybody has at home and calling it something new, I’m beginning to think the company is just on a quest to dominate shelf-space in the condiment aisle. At this rate, grocery stores are going to have to carve out a special enclave for the growing saucy sauce family.

Conclusion:

Given its limited applications and simple composition, Kranch doesn’t deserve the space it’ll hog in your refrigerator. Rather than buying this, I’d recommend saving your $3.00 and mixing some ketchup and ranch at home.

Purchased Price: $2.98
Purchased at: Walmart
Size: 19 fl. oz.
Rating: 4 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 tablespoons) 100 calories, 10 grams of total fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 170 milligrams of sodium, 3 grams of total carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 3 grams of total sugars, 2 grams of added sugars, 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Blueberry Cheerios Cereal

Vin 8 Comments

Blueberry Cheerios Cereal

What are Blueberry Cheerios?

After decades of Honey Nut and the occasional new flavor of Cheerios, it seems like we’ve gotten at least 20 new varieties in the past couple years, with Blueberry being the latest to hit shelves.

How are they?

Blueberry Cheerios are not quite up to snuff with the previous fruit inspired flavors, but that’s not to say they’re bad.

Blueberry Cheerios Cereal Dry

First off, the scent is pitch perfect. I bet you could name this cereal in a blind sniff test with no hesitation. The cereal pieces appear to be caked with a purplish dust with little bits of actual pureed blueberry.

The flavor is not as strong as I expected. The first few bites give you a quick blueberry hit, but it soon fades as the dust dissipates into the milk.

Blueberry Cheerios Cereal Games

There are no artificial flavors, which I assumed and appreciated. That said, when it comes to blueberry, I think I prefer a regrettable sugary start to my morning. This is the adult’s Blueberry Toast Crunch, which is odd considering a toddler could master the games on the box.

Is there anything else you need to know?

Blueberry Cheerios Cereal Wet

It’s almost two cereals in one. You start with purple o’s and white milk, but within a minute you have an almost normal looking bowl of Cheerios floating in a purplish run-off.

The milk ends up being the tastiest part as the cereal pieces get blander. I drank the second half of the bowl, cereal pieces and all.

Conclusion:

I’ve tried most of the fruit Cheerios (Banana, Peach, Berry, etc.) and I honestly think they’re all superior. Blueberry is still a solid cereal, but I’d put it near the bottom in terms of Cheerios flavors.

I know we’ve had Fruity Cheerios in the past, but I would love a “Fruit Medley” mix consisting of all the previously mentioned flavors. Blueberry would make a great supporting player.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 10.9 oz
Purchased at: Shop Rite
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (3/4 cup) 110 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 125 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 8 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Ben & Jerry’s Snackable Dough Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Chunks

Marvo 2 Comments

Ben Jerry s Snackable Dough Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Chunks Pouches

What are the Ben & Jerry’s Snackable Dough Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Chunks?

They’re the same gritty and chewy globs of deliciousness that are in Ben & Jerry’s classic Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream. It’s also available in vegan form, which is in the ice cream company’s somewhat new Non-Dairy Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Frozen Dessert. There’s also a peanut butter cookie dough version. Unfortunately, Ben & Jerry’s didn’t send that to me. Sad panda.

The most noticeable ingredient differences between the vegan and regular versions are the use of coconut oil instead of butter, and there are no eggs in the vegan one.

With most other edible cookie dough out there, you need utensils to eat them, but these chunks are completely snackable.

How are they?

Wonderful.

Ben Jerry s Snackable Dough Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Chunks

I should preface that by saying Ben & Jerry’s Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough is one of my top five favorite B&J’s flavors. To be honest, I’ve never taken the time to think of and write down what my favorite five varieties are, but CCCD would definitely on the list. I love the brown sugar and chocolate of every cookie dough chunk. I also love the gritty and soft texture with the snap of the chocolate chips.

Ben Jerry s Snackable Dough Vegan Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Chunks

While the regular cookie dough chunks vary in size, the vegan ones are more uniform and slightly firmer, but they’re just as snackable.

Actually, I don’t believe that with every fiber of my being. If I had to choose between the two, I’d prefer the regular one. It tastes a little bit better, but that’s because my taste buds think it has more chocolate flavor than the vegan one, which has a more noticeable brown sugar flavor. A stronger chocolate kick is what I prefer, but I wouldn’t complain if I won a sweepstakes for a lifetime supply of the vegan one. Both make me want to stick my hands into them repeatedly like I’m an OCD kangaroo.

Is there anything else you need to know?

If you want to upgrade crappy frozen dairy dessert **cough**Breyers**cough**, this will do it. If you’d like to create Ben & Jerry’s Xtreme Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream, this will do it.

These have to be kept frozen, but if you let the regular one thaw for a few minutes, it’ll have a pleasant cookie dough-like squishy texture.

I do wish the pouches they came in were larger or had more. A serving is approximately 10-14 pieces, and there are only eight servings per bag, which doesn’t seem like much to me. I found myself quickly blowing past the serving size right after opening them.

Conclusion:

If you’re like me who goes digging into a pint of Ben & Jerry’s Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream like an archeologist to obtain the glob of cookie dough safely, then these pouches of snackable cookie dough are a no brainer. No digging necessary.

DISCLOSURE: I received free samples from Ben & Jerry’s. Doing so did not influence my review in any way. Yes, this very positive review might make you skeptical. But I rest assured, I have given you my honest thoughts about them.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 8 oz. pouches
Purchased at: Received from Ben & Jerry’s
Rating: 9 out of 10 (Regular)
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Vegan)
Nutrition Facts: (28 grams) Original – 110 calories, 5 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 45 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein. Vegan – 120 calories, 4 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 30 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Reign Total Body Fuel by Monster Energy

Marvo 16 Comments

Update 9/12/20: Added Lilikoi Lychee flavor.

In the world of performance energy drinks, there’s one leader — Bang. In the world of energy drinks, there is one leader — I don’t know who that is and I’m too lazy to look it up. If only there were drinks I could consume to give me some energy to do so.

It could be Red Bull. It could be Monster. Maybe Rockstar. Maybe Cocaine Energy Drink? But Monster is one of the heavy hitters in the energy drink universe.

So what are “performance energy drinks”? From what I can gather, they’re made for athletes to give them big boosts of energy that allow them to do things at a higher level. In order to do that, they have 300 milligrams of caffeine per can and contain supplements like coenzyme Q10 and branched-chain-amino acids.

While Bang is in the lead, Monster hopes to gain market share with its new Reign Total Body Fuel line. Yes, it’s not Monster Total Body Fuel, because who wants to use a well-recognized trademark over a name that sounds like a mobile game with lots of in-app purchases.

So Monster could have dipped its toes in the category, but it decided to make a splash by offering SIX flavors of Reign — Carnival Candy, Melon Mania, Lemon HDZ, Peach Fizz, Sour Apple, and Razzle Berry. They all have 300 milligrams of caffeine, 0 grams of sugar, 0 calories, no artificial colors (yes, they’re all clear), and no artificial flavors. In 2020, Lilikoi Lychee was added.

Lilikoi Lychee

Reign Total Body Fuel Lilikoi Lychee

(Added 9/12/20)

For those unfamiliar with lilikoi, perhaps you know it from its common name — passion fruit. For those unfamiliar with lychee, it’s quite possibly one of the most incredible fruits Mother Nature has given us. If you haven’t had it, you should definitely try it. Of course, my thoughts about the red flesh fruit might be hyperbole to some, but it’s one tasty fruit and a flavor that’s rarely seen in U.S. beverages, so I’m happy to see it in this.

The first sip has a sweet and robust lychee flavor that tastes like the perfect lychee. It’s divine. The lilikoi lingers somewhere in there, but all I care about is that lychee. Unfortunately, like some other Reign flavors, the next sip is less potent, but the lilikoi seems to be highlighted more. Again, if I give my taste buds a chance to reset themselves, the bold lychee flavor comes back.

Because of my love for lychee and how it dominates this flavor, I have to say that this is now my favorite Reign variety.

Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 can) 10 calories, 0 grams of fat, 230 milligrams of sodium, 3 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

Carnival Candy

Reign Total Body Fuel Carnival Candy

When I took the first sip, I got a lot of cotton candy flavor, but that went away with the sips right after. Those had more of a general sweetness. There’s a little cotton candy in the aftertaste, but I want it whenever I’m drinking it because when it’s there, it’s quite lovely.

Now if you let your taste buds reset and not sip on it for a while, the cotton candy flavor will return briefly for that one sip and then go back to not tasting like the carnival treat. I have to say this was the one variety I was most looking forward to and it ended up being a little disappointing.

Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (8 ounces) 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 100 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

Sour Apple

Reign Total Body Fuel Sour Apple

This flavor has the same issue that Carnival Candy has. The first sip tastes like sour apple, but subsequent sips lose most of the apple flavoring, leaving a sweet and tart taste. But, again, let your taste buds rest a little, and the full fruity and sourness comes back for one sip. The sour apple flavor is good, but I wish it’s around for every sip.

Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (8 ounces) 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 100 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

Melon Mania

Reign Total Body Fuel Melon Mania

I was hoping this would be flavored like either a cantaloupe or honeydew melon because the world needs more of those, but the can’s color scheme makes it obvious it’s going to be watermelon. If you’re expecting it to taste similar to a Jolly Rancher hard candy, it’s not like that says my taste buds who are currently enjoying a watermelon Jolly Rancher because we just so happen to have some in our house. It’s better tasting than that. It’s like an enhanced version of watermelon flavoring.

Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (8 ounces) 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 100 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

Lemon HDZ

Reign Total Body Fuel Lemon HDZ

Because I’m uncool, I wasn’t sure what HDZ was, but I asked our Twitter followers, and they came up with the obvious answer — Heads. (Full disclosure: I thought it was Hards.) I thought this one would be like a lemonade, but it’s not quite that because there isn’t a noticeable sourness to it. I want to say lemon meringue because there’s something else to the flavor that I can’t quite put my finger on. Despite not knowing what it exactly tastes like, I enjoyed it.

Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (8 ounces) 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 100 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

Peach Fizz

Reign Total Body Fuel Peach Fizz

If you enjoy peach-flavored gummies, then you’ll like this. It’s not overly flowery tasting like some peach products are. Its flavor reminded me of the Red Bull Peach Edition I had recently. Peach Fizz is my favorite of the bunch, but not by a lot over Melon Mania. (Update 9/12/20: It’s no longer my favorite. See Lilikoi Lychee.)

Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (8 ounces) 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 100 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

Razzle Berry

Reign Total Body Fuel Razzle Berry

This one tastes similar to other blue raspberry-flavored beverages I’ve had in that it’s fruity and slightly sour. It also reminds me of Carnival Candy, so some of the same natural flavors might’ve been used. Fortunately, unlike Carnival Candy, Razzle Berry’s flavor doesn’t fade with the second sip. As someone who enjoys Louie-Bloo Raspberry Otter Pops, it’s not surprising I liked the taste of this.

Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (8 ounces) 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 100 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

Even with the issues I experienced with some of the flavors, I have to say these were surprisingly good for drinks with zero sugar and calories. As someone who has consumed a lot of beverages sweetened with sucralose and ace-K, I could tell they have no sugar, but the flavors do great at hiding that fact.

Some of you might be wondering how these help with performance. I did not test that because the most laborious physical activity I do is an exercise called finger push-downs, which is otherwise known as typing.

Purchased Price: $2.99 each
Size: 16 fl. oz. cans
Purchased at: Target