Category: Reviews

REVIEW: Post Nutter Butter Cereal

Marvo 10 Comments

Post Nutter Butter Cereal

Eating a bowl of Post Nutter Butter Cereal makes me feel bad.

Oh, there’s nothing wrong with its flavor. But its peanut-like shape makes me feel as if I’m eating the corpses of Planters’ Mr. Peanut and his extended family. It would’ve freaked me out if there were also cereal pieces shaped like top hats, canes, and monocles. But that’s not all I found weird about the cereal’s shape. Nutter Butter Cookies are flat but every single piece in the box bends at the middle.

As you can read on the box, this cereal is made with real peanut butter. Of course, that’s if you consider peanuts, dextrose, hydrogenated vegetable oil, and salt as peanut butter and not peanut butter spread. But it’s not as if there’s a thin layer of peanut butter on every piece. Although that would’ve been amazing and messy.

Post Nutter Butter Cereal 2

Instead, there’s a powdery coating on the cereal that gives it a strong, sweet peanut butter aroma and flavor. The coating also gives the cereal a cool texture. Yes, it’s still a crunchy cereal, but around it is a flavoring that melts when you bite into it. I don’t know if “melt” is the best way to describe it. But whatever it is, it gives the cereal a creaminess. A powder turning creamy is kind of a weird mindscrew.

All it took was popping one piece into my mouth to know that I would love this cereal. The bold peanut butter flavor, while not exactly like Nutter Butter cookies, makes me want to find the biggest bowl in my kitchen, dump the whole bag into it, and snack on it all day. It has a slight saltiness and doesn’t taste artificial. In fact, there were times when it reminded me of boiled peanuts. Even in milk, the peanut butter flavor stays true because the coating doesn’t wash off. The milk at the bottom of the bowl doesn’t get all peanut buttery. But I’m not too sad about that.

With its great peanut butter flavor, there are so many things I want to do with this cereal. I want to eat it with chocolate milk. I want to make milkshakes with it. Heck, I’m going to eat another bowl right now.

If you miss Peanut Butter Toast Crunch Cereal, this is more than a worthy replacement. With its strong peanut butter flavor, sweetness that’s at a level that takes me back 80s cereal, and creamy texture, I have to say it’s the best peanut butter cereal I’ve ever had.

Disclosure: I was provided a free sample by Walmart. The fact that I got it for free did not influence my review.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 cup – 150 calories, 40 calories from fat, 4.5 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 2.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 45 milligrams of potassium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: Received for free
Size: 19 oz. box
Purchased at: Available as a Walmart exclusive until 4/1/18
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: The best peanut butter cereal I’ve had. Bold, sweet peanut butter flavor. Peanut butter coating gives the cereal a creaminess when it melts in your mouth.
Cons: Pieces not flat like actual Nutter Butter Cookies (is it hard to make flat cereal pieces?). Shape makes me feel as if I’m eating Mr. Peanut and his family. Milk at the bottom of bowl not peanut buttery.

REVIEW: Post Chips Ahoy Cereal

Marvo 5 Comments

Post Chips Ahoy Cereal

“I’m eating chocolate chip cookies for breakfast! Life is awesome! Yo Joe!”

That’s what I imagine I yelled decades ago when I had my first taste of Cookie Crisp Cereal. And this is what I’d like to yell now after having my first taste of Post’s Original Chips Ahoy Cereal.

“I’m eating a poor facsimile of chocolate chip cookies for breakfast/lunch/dinner/midnight snack/whenever I feel like it! Adult life is scary! Wubba lubba dub dub!”

Look, let’s be honest and crush the hopes and dream of children everywhere who somehow end up at this review by pointing out that Cookie Crisp/Chips Ahoy Cereal is to cookies as Velveeta is to cheese. They may look the part, but dig deeper and you’ll find the truth. Sorry, kids.

Speaking of digging, I wouldn’t be surprised if Post Chips Ahoy Cereal is a rebranded version of Malt-o-Meal’s Chocolatey Chip Cookie Bites, which is also produced by Post. The two have the exact same ingredients, in the same order, and the exact nutrition facts.

Post Chips Ahoy Cereal 2

The cereal looks like mini Chips Ahoy Cookies, if you look at it from three feet away. Anywhere within three feet, it looks like Cookie Crisp. Unfortunately, looking like Chips Ahoy from a distance is the only similarity it has with the popular packaged cookie.

The cereal has a sweet, oat-y aroma that lacks any chocolate. The chocolatey dots don’t stick to the corn and whole grain oat pieces well, so expect a pool of dark dots to settle at the bottom of the bag it came in.

It tastes similar to Cookie Crisp. There’s a nondescript sugariness to it, but only a whisper of chocolate, even with pieces loaded with chocolatey specks. There’s cocoa in the dark dots and in the cereal itself, but it’s hard to detect. Once the sugariness dissolves, the underlying corn and whole grain flavors start to come out. In milk, the dairy enhances the sugary flavors a little, but I wish the chocolate flavor stood out more.

Post Chips Ahoy Cereal doesn’t taste like Chips Ahoy, but that’s what I expected since Post Oreo O’s Cereal doesn’t exactly taste like Oreo cookies. But, it’s disappointing because there’s nothing about it that makes it stand out.

If you enjoy Cookie Crisp, then this will be fine to eat while watching Saturday morning cartoons as part of a complete breakfast or when you throw your spoons in the air and wave ‘em like you just don’t care about what you’re eating for dinner.

Disclosure: I was provided a free sample by Walmart. The fact that I got it for free did not influence my review.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 cup – 120 calories, 20 calories from fat, 2 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 120 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 24 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.)

Purchased Price: Received for free
Size: 19 oz. box
Purchased at: Available as a Walmart exclusive until 4/1/18
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Adequate flavor. Tastes similar to Cookie Crisp. Stays crunchy in milk for a while. Comes in big box.
Cons: Doesn’t taste like Chips Ahoy. Doesn’t taste anything like chocolate chip cookies. Possibly a repackaged version of Malt-o-Meal’s Chocolatey Chip Cookie Bites. Doesn’t have a strong chocolate flavor.

REVIEW: 7-Eleven Mint Oreo Hot Chocolate

Mark 2 Comments

7 Eleven Mint Oreo Hot Chocolate

I’ve never been a big fan of buying hot chocolate from a gas station, food truck, or stand. Why fork out that money when you can go home and make your own from a powder? It’s a lot cheaper, and you won’t waste a disposable cup.

But, strangely, there’s something alluring about buying food from 7-Eleven. It might be overpriced garbage, but it’s tasty garbage. A guilty pleasure.

7 Eleven Mint Oreo Hot Chocolate 2

When I filled up my cup with 7-Eleven’s Mint Oreo Hot Chocolate, I was excited about how thick, chocolatey, and sugary it looked. What could be better than that on a foggy, freezing day? But it would be several minutes before I would actually get to try it.

First of all, it was very steamy when it came out, and I wouldn’t be able to taste it if I scalded my tongue. Second, I didn’t want to be tasting it and taking pictures there in the 7-Eleven. Would people be judging me? (I did some judging of my own at 7-Eleven: I was grateful the cashier didn’t touch my cup or give me a receipt because she had just sneezed into her hand. Srsly, people, Dracula sneeze!)

And third, I recently got a new car, so I made it a rule not to eat or drink in it. I put my cup in the cup holder and didn’t touch it until I got to my work’s parking lot.

7 Eleven Mint Oreo Hot Chocolate 3

When I finally tasted it, it had cooled but was still warm. It fulfilled its purpose as hot chocolate: warm, chocolatey, comforting.

Unfortunately, it fulfilled its purpose as Mint Oreo Hot Chocolate in all the wrong ways. The mint flavor was only subtle, and the Oreo flavor was even more subtle. A few sips almost seemed bland. Yet the one way it did seem like an Oreo was in a slimy, oily mouthfeel. It felt like I had a wad of Oreo creme in my mouth, but without the satisfaction of that actually happening. They left out the best part of a Mint Oreo (the flavor) but kept the worst (the post-cookie mouthfeel).

During the cooling period, a lot of the flavor had settled to the bottom, so the last few sips were better than the rest had been. I thought, “Oh, maybe it’s not so bad.” But then it occurred to me: if I had drunk it before the flavor had settled out, it would have been more flavorful than most of my experience, but it still would have been more diluted than the end. As it was, I thought the dregs were on the low end of the flavor I would have liked.

If your car breaks down on a winter’s day and you’re stuck next to a 7-Eleven, the Mint Oreo Hot Chocolate would comfort you against the chill. Otherwise, you’re better off making your own from powder and dropping in a candy cane.

(Nutrition Facts – Not available on 7-Eleven’s website.)

Purchased Price: $1.49
Size: 12 oz. cup
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Fulfills its purpose as hot chocolate: warm, chocolatey, comforting.
Cons: The mint and Oreo flavors are subtle. Leaves an unpleasant mouthfeel. Less economical than making your own.

REVIEW: McDonald’s Signature Swiss Mushroom Melt

Marvo 16 Comments

McDonald s Signature Crafted Mushroom Swiss Melt

Peeling back the bun of my McDonald’s Signature Swiss Mushroom Melt revealed that the employee who made my burger obviously has something against mushrooms and wanted to punish the ones in my order by drowning them in the garlic and herb spread.

McDonald s Signature Crafted Mushroom Swiss Melt 2

Or maybe that’s how they’re made because the promo photos my local McDonald’s have been posting to social media show a liberal amount of spread. Either that or the burger has rabies.

McDonald s Signature Swiss Mushroom Melt 5

(Image via Hawaii McDonald’s Twitter.)

Along with the garlic and herb condiment, my McDonald’s Swiss Mushroom Melt featured seasoned, grilled mushrooms, two slices of Swiss cheese, and a 1/4 lb. beef patty on a sesame seed bun. Much like other Signature Crafted Recipes, you can also have it made with crispy or grilled chicken and get it with an artisan roll.

If you like mushroom and Swiss burgers because of those two ingredients, this one will disappoint. The spread hides the flavors of the shrooms and Swiss as effective as a Klingon cloaking device hides a Bird-of-Prey ship. But the sauce also hides the fact that the beef patty is somewhat dry.

McDonald s Signature Crafted Mushroom Swiss Melt 2 1

It might’ve not been so bad if the spread was flavorful, but it doesn’t have a strong garlic or herb presence. It’s mild enough to negate the flavors of the mushroom and cheese, but not strong enough to give it a memorable flavor. Yes, even with all that sauce blasted onto the mushrooms. The beef patty’s flavor does come through a little, but that doesn’t make this burger worth it.

I can understand the reasoning behind adding the garlic and herb spread. Every time McDonald’s comes out with a new burger line there’s bound to be a mushroom and Swiss version and they’re all pretty much the same — sautéed mushrooms, mayo, and Swiss cheese. The condiment makes it different, but, unfortunately, it doesn’t make it better.

NOTE: This is only available in select markets.

Purchased Price: $5.39
Size: N/A
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Not available on McDonald’s website.

REVIEW: Lindt Lindor Limited Edition Gingerbread Milk Chocolate Truffles

Joe 4 Comments

Lindt Lindor Limited Edition Gingerbread Milk Chocolate Truffles

I know there are Santa-hatted zombies who advocate for the head first consumption of anthropomorphic treats. But as gingerbread-based lifeforms are known to bolt at the first sign of milk, I prioritize immobilization.

With no central nervous system, a headless treat may leave your cookie craving unfulfilled. For inexperienced or squeamish cookie eaters, Lindt is offering up Lindor Limited Edition Gingerbread Truffles. Sourced from the finest cuts of cookie anatomy, the classic Lindor milk chocolate shell is infused with gingerbread cookie pieces encapsulating a gingerbread truffle filling.

Lindt Lindor Limited Edition Gingerbread Milk Chocolate Truffles 2

The cookie bits add a pleasant grit to the standard and delicious chocolate shell, but all of the limited edition flavor comes by way of the creamy truffle center. As gingerbread cookies are far from creamy in their natural state, liquefying them must be a disturbing transmogrification that only those haunted by the memories of gingerbread houses gone awry can stomach.

The trauma of these tortured souls is evidenced by their Bond-villain like maniacal laughter as licorice bound gingerbread people are slowly lowered into magmatic vats of palm kernel oil.

Lindt Lindor Limited Edition Gingerbread Milk Chocolate Truffles 3

Unfortunately, the disturbingly produced core is much sweeter than any gingerbread cookie I’ve eaten and comes across with almost floral notes. These Mr. Big inspired chocolatiers must take particular umbrage with the housewives of the ginger-burbs where saccharin-based Botox is all the rage. A little less literal sweet revenge and a bit more bitter molasses may have produced a better balance and left a few more cookie families intact for the holidays.

While I possess the confectionary architectural aptitude of a blind Fraggle, I hold no ill will towards gingerkind. Even so, Lindor Gingerbread Truffles are worth trying for the novelty, but I will embrace my role as the apex predator of cookie munching interspersed with bites of a standard truffle when the mood for both strikes.

Purchased Price: $5.94
Size: 8.5 oz. bag
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (3 Balls) 220 calories, 17 grams of fat, 12 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 35 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, 14 grams of sugar, 1 gram of dietary fiber, and 2 grams of protein.