REVIEW: Jif Hazelnut Spreads (Chocolate and Mocha Cappuccino)

/ / Reviews / 26 Comments

Jif Hazelnut Spreads (Chocolate and Mocha Cappuccino)

There are some of you out there who can blame Nutella for adding several pounds to your frame. I’m not one of them. For years, I heard from many people about the great hazelnut spread called Nutella, but never dipped a knife, spoon, fork, finger, or tongue into a jar of it.

If a lot of people were saying it was so wonderful, why didn’t I try it?

Maybe I purchased several Costco-sized jars of peanut butter because I had a coupon and didn’t want to try spreading something different on my bread until I used all of them up. Or perhaps I trust Flavor Flav when he says, “Don’t… Don’t… Don’t… Don’t… Don’t believe the hype.” Or maybe because Nutella comes from the Italian company Ferrero, I wanted to be patriotic and eat my way from a 30-inch waist to a 32-inch waist with American food.

However, my Nutella virginity was taken away from me during a foursome with a jar of Nutella and the two new Jif Hazelnut Spreads — Chocolate and Mocha Cappuccino. I could’ve kept my Nutella virginity intact, but I thought who better to find out whether these Jif Hazelnut Spreads can compete with the world famous Nutella than a guy who would be trying Nutella for the first time.

So, what do I think of Nutella?

Holy balls! Nutella is nuterrific! It makes me want to go from a 32-inch waist to a 34-inch waist by eating lots of it. Oh man, so many years lost that could’ve been filled with spreading Nutella on top of 100 percent whole wheat bread or dipping shortbread cookies into it. Oh. My. Goodness. What else am I missing out on? Damn, I need to make a bucket list.

Jif Hazelnut Spreads (Chocolate and Mocha Cappuccino) Closeup

But what about the Jif Hazelnut Spreads?

The Jif Chocolate Hazelnut Spread is nuttier, while Nutella has a deeper chocolate flavor and is sweeter, but if you were to create your own 1980s Folgers-like commercial at someone’s house, where you’ve secretly replaced the Nutella they usually serve with Jif Chocolate Hazelnut Spread to see if anyone can tell the difference, I think most people won’t. Personally, I prefer the stronger chocolate flavor of Nutella.

As for Jif’s Mocha Cappuccino Hazelnut Spread, it’s a shade darker than the chocolate spread and it had a noticeable coffee flavor, but after the initial coffee flavor, the chocolate and hazelnut took its place on my taste buds. At first, I wished the spread had a stronger coffee flavor, like I just ate some chocolate covered espresso beans, but then realized that would’ve been stupid because the spread would’ve been a bit too bitter. Overall, I enjoyed Jif’s Mocha Cappuccino Hazelnut Spread as much as the chocolate version.

While there isn’t a significant difference in flavor between Jif’s Chocolate Hazelnut Spread and Nutella there are notable differences between the two. The Jif Hazelnut Spreads have the visual consistency of Jif peanut butter and at times they also look like Duncan Hines cake frosting. Nutella, on the other hand, is creamy, silky smooth, and sexy. That silky smoothness isn’t only sexy, it also makes it easier to spread on bread or skin. Yes, Nutella looks like I should be using it as body paint. Another difference between the two are their prices. A 13-ounce jar of Nutella was a dollar more than a 14.1-ounce jar of Jif’s Hazelnut Spreads.

Jif’s Hazelnut Spreads are just as tasty as Nutella. I’m no choosy mom, but if I was one, I might consider buying a jar because of their lower price. And while I give my children Jif peanut butter, I’ll spread Jif Hazelnut Spread on top of my bread, and if my children ask if they could try it, I’ll tell them, “No, just like the grape juice in the tall glass bottles, this is for mommy only.”

(Nutrition Facts – 2 Tbsp – Chocolate – 230 calories, 120 calories from fat, 14 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 40 milligrams of sodium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 21 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein, 6% calcium, and 6% iron. Mocha Cappuccino – 230 calories, 130 calories from fat, 14 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 40 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 21 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein, 6% calcium, and 6% iron.)

Other Jif Hazelnut Spread reviews:
Foodette Reviews

Item: Jif Hazelnut Spreads (Chocolate and Mocha Cappuccino)
Price: $6.49 each
Size: 14.1 ounces
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Chocolate)
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Mocha Cappuccino)
Pros: As tasty as Nutella. Makes bread taste so much better. Cheaper than Nutella. Eating Jif Hazelnut Spreads with a spoon. Nutella. Secretly replacing things.
Cons: Has the consistency of peanut butter, which is less sexy than Nutella’s consistency. Being a Nutella virgin for so long. Expanding waist size.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert!

/ / Reviews / 13 Comments

Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert!

According to the internet, I’ve been saying sherbet wrong all these years. I thought it was pronounced how Nabisco presents it with their new Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert!

But it turns out it’s pronounced sher-bit and it rhymes with hermit.

Oh, hold on for a second. The internet is telling me it’s pronounced sherr-bet.

Oh wait, Nabisco is also correct.

Geez, internet, you’re no help. You’re as reliable as Price is Right audience members shouting random numbers at contestants.

If there’s one thing more frustrating than pronouncing sherbet, it was my attempts to get my hands on a package of Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert! It’s a limited edition flavor exclusive to Walmart, but I visited my nearest Walmart several times over the course of three weeks and each time I walked out empty handed. After being disappointed for the umpteenth time, I decided to drive 17 miles to the next farthest Walmart, which had a diabetes-causing stock of Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert!

So to Walmart store #5274, you’re awesome! And, to Walmart store #3478, I hope the Sam’s Club on top of you gets so heavy that it crushes you.

If you were able to purchase a package of Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert!, congratulations, you have in your possession a tasty sandwich cookie.

Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert! Closeup

It has a strong fruity aroma that hit my nose soon after lifting the easy open pull tab for the first time. It did smell like sherbet and what I imagine releasing the ghosts of the Fruit of the Loom guys would smell like. Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert! is made up of raspberry and lime filling in between two Golden Oreo cookies. The raspberry and lime creme ratio varies from cookie to cookie, but I thought they all tasted the same.

One of the issues I had with last year’s Limited Edition Creamsicle Oreo cookies was that the Creamsicle flavor was hidden behind the Golden Oreo cookies, but that was not the case with these Rainbow Shure, Bert! Oreo cookies. Actually, because the sherbet flavor is quite strong, I think some eaters might think they’re a bit too sweet.

When I first heard about these cookies, I thought what kind of rainbow sherbet has only two flavors, but the raspberry and lime combination was extremely tasty and it did taste like sherbet. The raspberry creme had very little tartness and the lime had an equal amount of sourness, but they were both really sweet. While the raspberry was noticeable while chewing the cookie, it disappeared soon after and my taste buds were left with the lime flavor, which lingered in my mouth long after the cookie was swallowed.

The Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert! cookies are damn good, but if you want to make them slightly better, albeit slightly tougher to bite through, I’d recommend sticking some in the freezer for a few hours. For some reason, the freezing temperatures enhances the sherbet flavor. I’d also like to suggest you not eat these Oreo cookies by twisting the top off and licking the creme. I thought they were significantly less enjoyable that way.

While I still don’t know how to properly pronounce the word “sherbet,” I do know these Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert! cookies are super duper delectable and if you’re able to find them, I’d suggest you pick them up.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 150 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 3 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 80 milligrams of sodium, 15 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.)

Other Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert! reviews:
Junk Food Guy
Fatguy Food Blog

Item: Limited Edition Ice Cream Oreo Rainbow Shure, Bert!
Price: $3.48
Size: 15.25 ounces
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Super duper tasty. Slightly better when placed in the freezer for a few hours. Crunchy. Smells and tastes like sherbet. Doing a touchdown dance when I finally found these cookies. Walmart store #5274.
Cons: Might be hard to find. Walmart exclusive. Might be a bit too sweet for some. Which is the correct pronunciation of sherbet? That damn exclamation point in its name. Walmart store #3478.

REVIEW: Extra Dessert Delights Root Beer Float Gum

/ / Reviews / 10 Comments

Extra Dessert Delights Root Beer Float

Since the dawn of stuff, people have been looking for a way to get their dessert fix on for a mere five calories. While early attempts by our ancestors to eat grass and cut pieces of cake just really, really small yielded lackluster results, the efforts of Wrigley and their Extra Dessert Delights gum have recently revolutionized the way we experience dessert.

No longer forced to choose between extreme portion control or insane feats of metabolic fitness to combat the effects of grandma’s apple pie or a container of mint chocolate chip ice cream, we can now chow down on our favorite sweets for the caloric equivalent of an ounce of chopped radishes.

This summer, Wrigley expanded their temping Extra Dessert Delights line of sugar-free gums with a root beer float-flavored variety.

I was an early convert to Extra’s Dessert Delights and have now tried all the flavors, including the now-defunct Rainbow Sherbet flavor (still mourning that one, for what it’s worth). So there was no question I’d be buying the new Root Beer Float gum, eschewing the ever-present threat of becoming a human whoopee cushion, all thanks to those lovely sugar alcohols, which, if I’m not being clear enough, will give you more gas than Saudi Arabia.

I like my Root Beer crisp, rough around the edges, and on the high side of the carbonation spectrum (think Barq’s) and won’t waste time on that smooth A&W crap that might as well be cream soda. No, I’m a Barq’s man, dammit, and when it comes to proper root beer float construction, I won’t settle for no boxed Walmart Frozen Dessert nonsense to pair with my soda. Nope, its good old fashioned, full fat vanilla bean hard ice cream for me, and anything less is a travesty that should be banished from these here United States.

The root beer flavor of Extra’s gum doesn’t have that hard and slightly bitter bite, and it sure doesn’t have the kind of carbonation that will help me win a burping contest with my nine-year-old cousins. It does, however, have a proper balance of vanilla and spice, with a prerequisite sweetness to please anyone not horribly averse to the long litany of artificial sweeteners used in its construction.

Extra Dessert Delights Root Beer Float Closeup

Sadly, Extra Dessert Delights Root Beer Float is another gum that suffers from the time-space continuum of the gum paradox, which, if you’re unfamiliar, confirms the very fact that the better tasting the gum, the less time the flavor lasts. I got a good minute of strong root beer float flavor from my sticks, but after that, it’s the law of diminishing returns. Unlike a real root beer float, you can’t even burp up the taste hours later.

And this, my friends, leads to the greatest travesty of all. Remember those hard-learned lessons regarding sugar alcohol consumption? In my efforts to keep a constant and bottomless root beer float going (and at a mere 10 sticks, only 50 calories) the laws of nature eventually caught up to me. I need not say more.

Extra’s new Dessert Delight’s Root Beer Float Gum tastes like a root beer float, but it doesn’t impress me. For it to impress me, Extra would have to pull a page from Willy Wonka and either A) Make the gum change from apple pie to strawberry shortcake to key lime pie to root beer float without making me turn into a gigantic blueberry or B) Come up with a way to make the flavor last more than a minute.

Given how far we’ve come as a culture in gum flavor development, it amazes me this hasn’t happened yet. Finally, let’s be real, Extra. When it comes to your sugar alcohol warning, tell it like it is. Attempting to recreate a never-ending root beer float may not leave you burping, but it will leave you feeling like the human equivalent to a whoopee cushion in the hands of an overzealous 10-year-old.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 stick – 5 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 2 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, 2 grams of sugar alcohol, and 0 grams of protein.)

Item: Extra Dessert Delights Root Beer Float Gum
Price: $2.00
Size: 3 pack/15 sticks
Purchased at: Giant
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Tastes like a root beer float. Smells like a root beer float. Good balance of vanilla and sassafras flavor. Smooth. Only 5 calories a stick. An All-American summer.
Cons: Gum paradox strikes again. Excessive consumption of sugar alcohols. No bite. No smooth, creamy richness component. Mug not included. Sugar alcohols.

NEWS: VitaminWater Jumps on Coconut Water Bandwagon With Their New Coco-Refresh Flavor

/ / Spotted on Shelves

Coconut face

Last year, SoBe introduced a Lifewater line with coconut water because coconut water was as hot as acai was the year before. And now VitaminWater has finally stuffed some coconut water into a new flavor called Coco-Refresh.

VitaminWater Coco-Refresh contains 10 percent real coconut water from concentrate, which is also the case with the SoBe beverages. Like all VitaminWater varieties, the coconut and pineapple-flavored Coco-Refresh has a purpose. While some help you focus and others help your skin, the latest has the amazing ability to rehydrate you.

Ooooh! Rehydration! I wish all the other VitaminWater varieties had that ability. Oh wait, they all have water, so they do.

Drink What has a review.

A 20-ounce bottle has 120 calories, 0 grams of fat, 30 milligrams of sodium, 880 milligrams of potassium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 31 grams of sugar, 0 grams of protein, 100% vitamin B6, 100% vitamin B12, 100% panothenic acid (vitamin B5), and, of course, it’s got electrolytes.

A quick comparison between Sobe Lifewater Coconut Water and VitaminWater Coco-Refresh shows Coco-Refresh has more calories and sugar than Sobe Lifewater Coconut Water, but it also has less sodium, more potassium, and all those B vitamins.

Image via flickr user tree-species / CC BY 2.0

REVIEW: Michelob Ultra Light Cider

/ / Reviews / 17 Comments

Michelob Ultra Light Cider

There’s something paradoxical about summer, and I think I’ve pinpointed it. See, it’s the time of the year when you’re showing the most skin, and thus need to be in your best shape; yet it’s also the season when you’re most tempted to eat poorly.

Oh, I’ll grant you winter has Christmas cookies and latkes (where my interfaith readers at?), and autumn doubles up with Halloween candy and Thanksgiving dinner. But those are isolated foods tied to specific holidays. Summer is an entire three months of cooking out burgers and hot dogs, roasting marshmallows over a campfire or bonfire, and drinking beer.

And oh, there are some great summer beers. I’m not much of a hefeweizen fan myself, but there’s summer ales and pilsners and IPAs to slake your thirst and remind you of how great a dancer you really are. But the fact is, alcohol is fattening. There’s no such thing as “beer abs.”

So if you’re going to indulge your vices while wearing something that makes other people want to indulge theirs, you need a low-calorie option. And Michelob has come up with a new diet-friendly solution they hope you’ll consider, called “Drink ’till your friends take your keys, then walk home.” Just kidding, it’s Michelob Ultra Light Cider, with a third fewer calories than traditional ciders.

I’ve had this drink’s spiritual precursor, “regular” Michelob Ultra, numerous times in the past and enjoyed it well enough by light beer standards. The big problem with light drinks is my child-sized bladder, since their relatively low alcohol content means I spend half of every night in the men’s room without getting even a minor buzz.

A glance at the front of the Light Cider bottle reveals that it’s 4.0% Alcohol By Volume, relatively but not ridiculously low. (For comparison, MGD 64 is 2.8% ABV, or what we like to call “German water.”) Still, this cider is more of an “unwind with your friends after a hard day at the office” drink, not one to get trashed on and send embarrassing texts to your high school crush. (She’s happy with Brad. Move on.)

Michelob Ultra Light Cider Bottle

Admittedly I don’t know much about cider, but as the father of two preschoolers, I have a passing acquaintance with apple juice. And when the first sip hit my tongue, my immediate thought was, “This is apple juice.” That impression didn’t much change as I continued to drink. It fizzes more than apple juice, but other than that, if you’re able to detect the alcohol in this cider, you have better taste buds than I. And not that I would ever try, but I’m 99 percent sure I could give this to my 3-year-old at breakfast and she’d drink it without noticing the difference, at least until Curious George started talking back to her.

You may be thinking, “That’s cool, I like apple juice.” And if so, you probably will dig this drink. But Ned Flanders once taught me if it’s tangy and brown, you’re in cider town, and this product is not brown and only slightly tangy. But it IS sweet and yellow, which typically means you’ve got juice there, fella. The ingredient list is no help, since apparently hard cider is just apple juice concentrate with dextrose and water added. Please do me the favor of mentally putting finger quotes around that “hard” part.

In all seriousness, it’s a decent beverage, though it is kind of disconcerting to be drinking something you know is alcoholic but tastes like kindergarten. Be sure to drink quickly, as this cider tastes worse when it gets warm.

On the other hand, you can probably add a point to the rating if you drink it over ice. It’s also gluten-free, so there’s that. I could see this being a good drink for summer cookouts where you need to keep your wits about you for that beach volleyball game after lunch, or when you want a fruity drink but there’s no little umbrellas around. But I also don’t think light beer has any reason to worry about being replaced.

(At the strong prompting of my wife, I’d like to reiterate that, no, I did not give my child this alcoholic drink. Obviously. Child vomit is just WAY too hard to get out of carpet.)

(Editor’s Note/Disclosure: Drew received free Michelob Ultra Light Cider samples from the nice folks over at Michelob. We did not receive any monetary compensation for this review, but if we did, we would totally disclose that too. Also, please drink responsibly.)

(Nutrition Facts – one 12 oz bottle – 120 calories, 0 grams of total fat, 15 milligrams of sodium, 10 grams of total carbohydrates, 6 grams of sugars, less than 1 gram of protein)

Item: Michelob Ultra Light Cider
Price: FREE
Size: 6 pack (12 oz bottles)
Purchased at: Received from nice folks at Michelob
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Doesn’t taste artificially sweetened (because it isn’t). ABV fairly equivalent to most light beers. Low calories and carbohydrates. Good news if you like apple juice. Slightly less girly than an appletini. Christmas cookies and latkes.
Cons: Can’t much taste the alcohol. Feels a little weird drinking cider in summer. Hard to drink a full bottle in one sitting — a little goes a long way. Really tastes and looks more like juice than cider. Tastes definitely takes a nosedive when you let it warm up.

Scroll to Top