REVIEW: Little Caesars Planteroni Pizza

Little Caesars Planteroni Pizza Whole

I’m not a vegetarian, but I’m no stranger to meat substitutes. My grandfather and stepdad are both vegan, my girlfriend used to be vegan, and I spent two years in college as a pescatarian (eating only fish). While I’ve settled in my omnivore ways as a taxpaying adult, I’m not opposed to a nice Impossible Burger or Tofurky Sausage, and I am legitimately fascinated by the huge wave of plant-based options that have swept fast food in recent years.

If you had told me Little Caesars would beat McDonald’s to the punch in adding a fake meat offering, I’d call ya crazy, but that’s exactly where we’ve landed. Little Caesars’ Planteroni Pizza is a large round pizza with Field Roast Plant-Based Pepperoni.

Little Caesars Planteroni Pizza No Ads

Pulling up to my second closest Little Caesars (my closest is usually a jam-packed nightmare I wanted to avoid), there were zero advertisements of this new plant-based ‘roni, likely because this item hasn’t rolled out nationwide. Although it still seems like a secret, even locally, it was prominently featured on LC’s terrific app under Limited Time Offers, and ordering went off without a hitch.

Little Caesars Planteroni Pizza Pepperoni

It looks great — nice and shiny cheese with a fresh and zesty aroma that instantly makes my mouth water. Field Roast’s “pepperoni” are faux meat made up of canola oil, wheat gluten, potato protein, and pea protein, along with a ton of other binders and flavors. They have a deeper color, thicker cut, and way less greasy shine than your average pepperoni.

Unfortunately, their different look and lack of shininess translate to a lackluster flavor as well. I have no issues with the tougher texture of plant-based proteins, but the lack of salty and fatty intensity really brings down the experience. With pepperoni that isn’t chockfull of salt and animal fat, the cheaper components of Little Caesars’ pizza are exposed, and the crust and sauce both taste weaker and less impactful than any LC’s pizza I’ve had in the last two years.

The saving grace was the Butter Garlic sauce I added to my order, which, hot take alert, is even better than Papa John’s with a more robust and intense garlic flavor. When dunked into that glorious silky sauce, the pizza is pretty good, bringing the necessary salt and fat desperately lacking from Field Roast’s creation.

Another issue with this is that it’s not vegan. Nothing has changed about this pizza except for the pepperoni, and I don’t see this as an improvement over plain cheese or a wonderful veggie combo like mushrooms, onions, and bell peppers for those who don’t eat meat.

Little Caesars Planteroni Pizza Cheep

At the price point that Little Caesars is offering this pizza, $8.49, it should at least be an ExtraMostBestest, with extra cheese and pepperoni, but it isn’t, and that lack of indulgence makes for something that’s pretty underwhelming. For a $2.50 upcharge (the most I’ve ever paid for an LC pizza), I don’t think the Planteroni delivered anything exciting to the Little Caesars experience, aside from a cool and catchy name.

Purchased Price: $8.49
Size: Large
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 pizza) 2180 calories, 84 grams of fat, 32 grams of saturated fat, 2 grams of trans fat, 150 milligrams of cholesterol, 4580 milligrams of sodium, 256 grams of carbohydrates, 14 grams of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, 107 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Taco Bell Loaded Taco Fries, Loaded Taco Fries Burrito, and Flatbread Tacos

Taco Bell Loaded Fries Burrito Split

Taco Bell’s Nacho Fries are back!

Taco Bell’s flatbread is back!

Taco Bell’s potatoes are back!

Taco Bell’s Volcano Sauce is back!

Taco Bell’s chihuahua is back!

Okay, those last two aren’t true, but can’t we dream?

Loaded Taco Fries and Loaded Taco Fries Burrito

Taco Bell Loaded Taco Fries Far

When Taco Bell’s Nacho Fries return, they usually comes with a new loaded variation that I assume was developed by having interns throw every ingredient the chain offers up into the air and having another intern catch as many of them as possible into a burrito-sized tortilla that’s attached to their head with a graduation cap.

This time the intern caught seasoned beef, crispy red strips, lettuce, nacho cheese sauce, spicy ranch, tomatoes, and cheese, and it’s called Loaded Taco Fries. There’s also a burrito version with all of that inside the same tortilla used by Taco Bell’s R&D interns.

Taco Bell Loaded Taco Fries Closeup

I might be wrong about many things, like how Taco Bell uses its interns, but I think this is the first time lettuce has appeared on Nacho Fries. And after seeing a lettuce layer on top of my order, I wondered if someday we’ll see a Taco Bell Loaded Taco Fries Salad. Just throwing that out there if a lot of lettuce gets caught in a tortilla, Taco Bell.

Obviously, the Nacho Fries are the highlight of both items. Their seasoning blends well with the much more bold seasoned beef, nacho cheese sauce, and spicy ranch. Also, the tomatoes brought a nice acidic burst. As much as I enjoyed eating both, all the flavors meld better in the burrito.

Taco Bell Loaded Fries Burrito Fist Bump

I mean, look at the cross-section shot above. I just want to fist bump it. Sure, the fries are not at all crispy, but they give the burrito a notable heft and thickness. Also, it’s just so cool to see fries in a burrito.

Taco Bell Loaded Fries Burrito Girth

Other things about the two menu items. The red strips maintain a decent crunchiness on the loaded fries, while the ones in the burrito were unsurprisingly soggy because it’s trapped in a tortilla with sauces and moisture. Also, I could’ve sworn the spicy ranch was hotter than what I experienced with these. On a scale of 10, it’s a one or two. Maybe my tolerance has changed?

Taco Bell is also offering both with black beans instead of seasoned beef. I apologize to our vegetarian readers for not trying those. Feel free to slap my face with lettuce leaves through your screen.

Purchased Price: $4.29 (Loaded Fries), $3.99 (Burrito)*
Size: N/A
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Loaded Fries), 8 out of 10 (Loaded Fries Burrito)
Nutrition Facts: Loaded Taco Fries – 560 calories, 36 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 35 milligrams of sodium, 1010 milligrams of sodium, 49 grams of carbohydrates, 7 grams of fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 12 grams of protein. Loaded Taco Fries Burrito – 590 calories, 30 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 1120 milligrams of sodium, 63 grams of carbohydrates, 7 grams of fiber, 4 grams of sugar, and 15 grams of protein.

Flatbread Tacos

Taco Bell Flatbread Tacos Both

The Flatbread Tacos come in three varieties — Loaded Chicken, Beefy Potato, and Loaded Black Bean. I didn’t try the black bean variety, so I apologize to our vegetarian readers again. Feel free to pelt me with dried beans through your screen.

The Loaded Chicken comes with grilled chicken, lettuce, avocado ranch sauce, cheese, and tomatoes. The beefier and potatoier version comes with seasoned beef, nacho cheese sauce, and potatoes.

Taco Bell Flatbread Tacos Beefy Potato

Between the two, I enjoyed the Beefy Potato one SIGNIFICANTLY more than the Loaded Chicken. It reminds me of the Taco Bell Beefy Potato-rito, and if you’ve had anything with seasoned beef and nacho cheese sauce, you’ll have an idea of what this tastes like. I’m a little surprised it didn’t come with a smoky or spicy sauce, but it’s still a gosh darn goodie the way it is.

Taco Bell Flatbread Tacos Loaded Chicken

With the chicken version, the flavors of what’s inside aren’t that bold to begin with, and they’re toned down by the flatbread, making the taco taste bland. That toning down also happens with the Beefy Potato, but the seasoned beef and nacho cheese sauce flavors do a better job at coming through the flatbread than the tender grilled chicken and avocado ranch.

Purchased Price: $2.89 (Loaded Chicken), $1.89 (Beefy Potato)*
Size: N/A
Rating: 5 out of 10 (Loaded Chicken), 7 out of 10 (Beefy Potato)
Nutrition Facts: Loaded Chicken – 270 calories, 11 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 35 milligrams of cholesterol, 580 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 4 grams of sugar, and 16 grams of protein. Beefy Potato – 310 calories, 13 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 20 milligrams of cholesterol, 700 milligrams of sodium, 37 grams of carbohydrates, 4 grams of fiber, 4 grams of sugar, and 11 grams of protein.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.

SPOTTED – 7/23/2021

Here are some interesting new products found on store shelves by your fellow readers. If you’ve tried any of the products, share your thoughts about them in the comments.

Sweet Earth Chik n Bacon Ranch Pizza
Sweet Earth Chik’n Bacon Ranch Pizza

(Spotted by Robbie at H-E-B.)

InnovAsian Chinese Style BBQ Pork Fried Rice
InnovAsian Chinese-Style BBQ Pork Fried Rice

(Spotted by Amanda Y at Market Street.)

Mission Fresh Signature Naan and Mini Naan
Mission Fresh Signature Naan and Mini Naan

(Spotted by Amanda Y at Market Street.)

Mission Fresh Signature Original Pitas
Mission Fresh Signature Original Pitas
Mission Fresh Signature Whole Wheat Pitas
Mission Fresh Signature Whole Wheat Pitas

(Spotted by Amanda Y at Market Street.)

Sprouts White Chocolate Dipped Coconut Rolls with Mixed Berry Flavor
Sprouts White Chocolate Dipped Coconut Rolls with Mixed Berry Flavor
Sprouts White Chocolate Dipped Coconut Rolls with Lemon Ginger Flavor
Sprouts White Chocolate Dipped Coconut Rolls with Lemon Ginger Flavor

(Spotted by Sarah R at Sprouts.)

Sprouts Hatch Chili Flavored Peanuts
Sprouts Hatch Chili Flavored Peanuts

(Spotted by Sarah R at Sprouts.)

Truff Black Truffle Infused Olive Oil
Truff Black Truffle Infused Olive Oil

(Spotted by Sarah R at Sprouts.)

REVIEW: Clif Cereal

Clif Cereal Boxes

Have you ever thought about the relative aisle spaces allotted to the different categories within a grocery store? Who dictates that there only be, say, ten feet devoted to granola bars competing for the attention of shoppers’ gaze and wallets while cereal gets its own exhaustive full-length aisle of sometimes 20 feet or more?

Well, someone must think of these things, and I imagine at least one of those people works for Clif Bar. Because the red-shirted carabining brand has climbed its way out singular bar form and is expanding into cereals with four new Clif Cereal Flavors: Honey & Peanut Butter, Apple Cinnamon & Almond Butter, Chocolate & Peanut Butter, and Blueberry & Almond Butter.

I could only find three of the four, so this review will exclude the Apple Cinnamon & Almond Butter flavor, much to my chagrin.

Clif Cereal Inside Boxes(From L to R) Blueberry & Almond Butter, Chocolate & Peanut Butter, and Honey & Peanut Butter

Upon initial opening, these looked ehhhh healthy, brown, and not unlike granola with the surprisingly high number of whole nuts and clusters visible. But, to be honest, I was somewhat relieved to see some big pieces of inclusions because each box was just shy of $7, which seems like a lot for cereal unless it contains whole almonds.

Honey & Peanut Butter

Clif Cereal Honey Peanut Butter

I started with the Honey & Peanut Butter one, figuring it would be the most subtle. It appears all of the flavors have the same base multigrain flake, but this one also had plain dry roasted peanuts, granola-type clusters, and crunchy rice puffs covered in a peanut butter flavored coating.

The coating reminded me of that yogurt-type stuff on the bottom of some granola bars. When eaten dry, this cereal is rrroouuugh. The front of the box touts “40% less sugar than leading cereal brands,” and boy do I believe them. As someone who tends to enjoy cereal dry or with milk, I was concerned. But THANKFULLY, a little milk goes a long way here.

What happens is the milk sort of dissolves the peanut butter coating on the clusters and at the same time softens the “oh yeah, these contain fiber” multigrain flakes. The result is a more evenly distributed sweetness and almost creaminess in each bite. Really delightful and peanut-butter-like without being TOO sweet.

Purchased Price: $6.97
Size: 15 oz box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10 (dry), 7 out of 10 (with milk)
Nutrition Facts: (3/4 cup) 240 Calories, 9 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 3 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 3.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 105 milligrams of sodium, 38 grams of carbohydrates, 7 grams of fiber, 6 grams of sugar, 5 grams of added sugar, and 8 grams of protein.

Chocolate & Peanut Butter

Clif Cereal Chocolate Peanut Butter

The chocolate peanut butter variety, though, never really made the same comeback. This box had the same flakes, the same peanut-coated clusters (although for some reason, they were HUGE in this box), and granola clusters with unsweetened cocoa.

When eaten dry, I couldn’t really discern any cocoa flavor at all. It was mostly just bitter and dry. When consumed with milk, the same peanut-butter-meldy thing took place, but I struggled to taste any chocolate because there was only unsweetened cocoa. I was underwhelmed, especially in a cereal world with a clearly dominant chocolate PB combo player.

Purchased Price: $6.97
Size: 15 oz box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 5 out of 10 (dry), 5 out of 10 (with milk)
Nutrition Facts: (3/4 cup) 240 calories, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 2.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 40 grams of carbohydrates, 8 grams of fiber, 6 grams of sugar, 6 grams of added sugar, and 8 grams of protein.

Blueberry & Almond Butter

Clif Cereal Blueberry Almond Butter

The most visually impressive BY FAR was the Blueberry & Almond Butter. There were whole dried blueberries, whole almonds, pumpkin seeds, granola clusters, our favorite little almond butter cluster dudes — this had it all!

I skipped straight to trying this with milk, and it was fantastic. There seemed to be tiny little blueberry bits throughout the cereal and clusters, making the whole bowl have a sweet, cohesive, fruity flavor immediately. I noticed that the sugar claim is only “30% less” on this box, which means I found the variety with the most sugar to be the most delicious. Surprise! Surprise!

But I think there’s something to be said about the perfect balance of whole grain goodness and fruit-derived sweetness when enjoying a breakfast cereal (or a granola bar, for that matter). I did try this one dry as well for posterity, and it was quite a bit more like a trail mix than the others. The blueberries really carried their weight here.

Purchased Price: $6.97 each
Size: 15 oz box
Purchased at: WalMart
Rating: 7 out of 10 (dry), 8 out of 10 (with milk)
Nutrition Facts: (3/4 cup) 240 calories, 8 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 3.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 115 milligrams of sodium, 39 grams of carbohydrates, 8 grams of fiber, 7 grams of sugar, 5 grams of added sugar, 8 grams of protein.

Overall, Clif has launched cereals that stay true to the established brand expectations of Clif Bar. They are reasonably high in protein, as far as cereals go, and offer a decent amount of fiber and whole grains without nearly as much sugar as other options. They certainly fill you up without feeling like you’re actively creating cavities.

However, I think the Blueberry option, which had slightly more sugar and a blanket of fruity blueberry to meld everything together, reigns supreme. I imagine the Apple Cinnamon SKU would be decent for similar reasons. I would steer clear of the Chocolate Peanut Butter option.

SPOTTED: Hidden Valley Ranch Pepperoni Pizza Dip

Hidden Valley Ranch Pepperoni Pizza Dip

Huh. Who would’ve thought I’d be posting a second new pepperoni pizza flavored dip shortly after the first. I didn’t have that on my processed foods bingo card.

I got a press release regarding this, so I just regurgitate some of what it says. It includes a creamy blend of cheese, zesty pepperoni, and signature Hidden Valley Ranch seasoning that that tastes great warmed up in the microwave or oven and dipped with chips, crackers, or even spread on a bagel.

Hidden Valley Ranch Pepperoni Pizza Dip is a Sam’s Club exclusive and comes in a 15 lb container. Oops. I forgot a decimal point. It comes in a 1.5 lb tub with an $8.48 price tag. (Spotted by Robbie at Sam’s Club.)

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