REVIEW: Dairy Queen Brownie Batter Blizzard

Dairy Queen Brownie Batter Blizzard Cup

What is the Brownie Batter Blizzard?

This is one of the six flavors in the “New! Summer Blizzard Menu” from Dairy Queen. Only this flavor is not new (it has been released several times over the years), and only the recently reviewed Girl Scout Thin Mints Blizzard is truly new. But enough with semantics, let’s move on to discuss the BBB (Brownie Batter Blizzard), which contains brownies in both batter and piece form.

How is it?

Remember in school when you had to determine the average, median, and mode? This Blizzard is all of those blended into one. There’s nothing wrong with it, but the batter flavor doesn’t really come through with any distinction.

Dairy Queen Brownie Batter Blizzard Spoon

If I really try, I can pick out subtle flavor hints that remind me of brownie batter, but it mostly tastes like chocolate syrup or fudge flavoring. The brownie chunks are fine, but you could have convinced me they were chocolate cookie dough instead of brownie. I did enjoy the chewy texture of the pieces.

Dairy Queen Brownie Batter Blizzard Brownie

Anything else you need to know?

Even though this Blizzard is nothing special, it got me thinking…is there such a thing as a “bad” Blizzard? I’ve never had one, but if you mix ice cream with any type of candy, cookies, brownies, nuts, etc., then it’s going to at least be palatable. So I am hereby challenging DQ to raise their game and dive into the gross-out food trend we’ve seen with jelly beans, sodas, and the like. How about a ketchup and mustard Blizzard? Or pickles and onions? Just think of all the social media action you would get off those, DQ.

Conclusion:

Dairy Queen Brownie Batter Blizzard Top

If your bucket list includes trying every DQ Blizzard ever released, then I guess go ahead and give this one a whirl. But if not, then you are not missing out on much by picking another Blizzard variety.

Purchased Price: $4.79
Size: Medium
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Medium) 770 calories, 34 grams of fat, 13 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 450 milligrams of sodium, 105 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of dietary fiber, 79 grams of sugar, and 15 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Girl Scout Thin Mints Blizzard

Dairy Queen Girl Scouts Thin Mints Blizzard Cup

What is the Girl Scout Thin Mints Blizzard?

It is part of Dairy Queen’s Summer Blizzard Menu, which is available two months before summer begins and includes this offering as the only new flavor of the six. As you surely have surmised by the name, this Blizzard includes vanilla soft serve with Girl Scout Thin Mints cookies and, importantly, as I will explain, cool mint.

How is it?

Dairy Queen Girl Scouts Thin Mints Blizzard Top

Before I get to the taste, I must assure you that the accompanying photos are indeed of the correct Blizzard. When it was delivered to my table, complete with an enthusiastic upside-down flip from a friendly DQ employee, I figured perhaps a mistake had been made as I stared down at my oddly grayish treat. So, I think for the first time in my life, I made a deliberate attempt to smell a Blizzard, and it definitely had that familiar Thin Mints aroma.

Dairy Queen Girl Scouts Thin Mints Blizzard Color

Confident that my order was right but still a bit perplexed by the color, I dug in. It tasted even better than it smelled and much better than it looked. This is coming from someone who likes Thin Mint cookies but doesn’t love them (and no, I even don’t love them straight from the freezer). Thin Mints are good — they are cookies, after all — but when I get guilted into buying Girl Scout cookies on a trip to the grocery store, I usually pick other varieties. So, this Blizzard had to prove its worthiness to me.

If it simply had Thin Mints blended in, even perhaps with some chocolate, then I think it would be pretty average. But with the addition of cool mint, which in the ingredients on the DQ website is listed as creme de menthe topping, it jumps up several levels. The flavor is a bit mintier than simply biting into a Thin Mint, but it is by no means overpowering, so the chocolate and more subdued mintiness of the cookie is still there.

Dairy Queen Girl Scouts Thin Mints Blizzard Spoon

Thin Mints also have a great texture for Blizzards, as they are not too crunchy but firm enough to hold up well in the ice cream. I was a bit surprised how much I liked this, especially given my neutral stance on Thin Mints.

Anything else you need to know?

I really cannot fully explain why my Blizzard was more gray than green, although the green color in the DQ advertising is somewhat muted, so the color difference was not that great after comparing the two. Plus, my Blizzard did get a bit greener as I got toward the bottom, so an uneven mix was likely at play too. But I don’t buy a Blizzard to look at it, so if it tastes good, I don’t care what color it is.

Conclusion:

If you really dislike Thin Mints, then take a gander at the five other options on the summer menu, but if you like Thin Mints even a little bit, then I think you’ll give this one a big thumbs up. And if you really love Thin Mints, you might even use both thumbs.

Purchased Price: $4.79
Size: Medium
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Medium) 900 calories, 32 grams of fat, 21 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 65 milligrams of cholesterol, 460 milligrams of sodium, 137 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 102 grams of sugar, and 18 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard

Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard Top

What is the Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard?

It’s Dairy Queen’s Blizzard of the Month for February, and it features red velvet cake pieces and cream cheese icing with, as always, vanilla soft serve. This is not technically new, as DQ has offered it in February a few times in the past. But it’s been five years since the last time it was available, according to our handy-dandy Blizzard of the Month List.

How is it?

Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard Sign

We all know better than to expect fast food to actually look like it does in a commercial or promotional photo, but the difference here was pretty glaring. Based on the window sign at DQ (and the name of this Blizzard), I was expecting it to be, you know, red. What I got was basically white with small red freckles and a tinge of reddish-pink. I think it was partly a blending issue, as the population of cake pieces increased dramatically as I tunneled downward, but even then, the reddish color only increased modestly.

I’m also not sure enough of the cake pieces were pulverized in the blending process to spread their redness around. A better blending might have made it slightly closer to the color on the window sign but still far from the vibrant red-pink color shown on the DQ website.

Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard Spoon

Of course, the more important issue is how it tastes, and the flavor of this one really makes up for the underwhelming appearance. For one thing, it’s different than most Blizzards, with no chocolate overload or extreme sweetness. The red velvet cake delivers a subtle chocolatey flavor that seems a bit more complex than just “regular chocolate,” and the cream cheese brings a sweet creaminess that pairs nicely. This won’t blow away your taste buds with a powerful burst of flavor, but it should make them happy.

Anything else you need to know?

I needed to know exactly what red velvet cake is because, to be honest, I was not exactly sure. I’ve had it many times, and I liked it, because, duh, it’s cake. But I’m not sure I could really describe what it tastes like. I’m still not really sure.

Some will claim that it’s just chocolate cake with red food coloring, but “real” red velvet cake generally includes cocoa, buttermilk, and vinegar, which together provide the reddish hue through a chemical reaction. Scanning the ingredients on the DQ website, it appears this red velvet cake is closer to a red-colored chocolate cake. It does contain cocoa, but there is no mention of buttermilk or vinegar.

Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard Cake Closeup

As you can see from a cross-section of a piece, it’s not exactly light and fluffy like you might imagine for cake; it’s really more the consistency of a red velvet brownie. So if you are a red velvet cake purist, this might not be for you.

Conclusion:

I’m always down for a Blizzard that is not some rehashed combination of chocolate, fudge, and Oreo, and this, well, it takes the cake for being different. It’s not the best Blizzard I’ve had, but it stands out as being unique for having two flavors not found in any other versions I can recall, and together they taste excellent. So this is a perfect treat to share with your significant (or even insignificant) other on Valentine’s Day or any time before it disappears for another five years.

Purchased Price: $4.79
Size: Medium
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Medium) 910 calories, 37 grams of fat, 19 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 75 milligrams of cholesterol, 500 milligrams of sodium, 128 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 90 grams of sugar, and 17 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Oreo Mocha Fudge Blizzard

Dairy Queen Oreo Mocha Fudge Blizzard Cup

What is the Dairy Queen Oreo Mocha Fudge Blizzard?

It’s proof that the marketing department at Dairy Queen is lazy! OK, maybe they are not lazy, and I’m sure they have lots of other important work keeping them busy. But the Oreo Mocha Fudge Blizzard was part of the fall Blizzard menu announced back in early September (which, by the way, was still summer), and now the same flavor is the Blizzard of the Month for October. The DQ website even proclaims it to be “new.” This new-ish Blizzard features Oreo cookies, choco chunks, and coffee.

How is it?

Let me preface this review by saying I’m not a coffee drinker, and I think I’ve only had it maybe five times in my life. With that said, it’s not that I dislike the taste of coffee but rather that I view it simply as a vehicle to get caffeine into my bloodstream. As a kid, my preferred vehicle (besides the Ferrari poster on my wall) was Mountain Dew, then Red Bull and Monster, and now just any of the 217 varieties of energy drinks at the convenience store will do the trick for me. So I’ve never really felt the need to drink coffee, and being one who spills drinks with great regularity, I’ve found it better not to mess with liquids that are hot and/or brown. I trust your enjoyment of this Blizzard will partly depend on whether you like coffee, but I was a bit surprised how much I enjoyed this considering my coffee indifference.

Dairy Queen Oreo Mocha Fudge Blizzard Spoon

The coffee taste is rather mild and subdued, and if you get enough Oreo cookies and chocolate in a spoonful, you might forget the coffee flavor is even there. Oreo and choco chunks are two Blizzard staples that have appeared many times over the years, along with various sugary friends and for a good reason.

Dairy Queen Oreo Mocha Fudge Blizzard Dig

The big Oreo pieces are always tasty, especially when you get one with some crème filling still attached, and I love the way the magical Oreo dust gets mixed in throughout the Blizzard. And the choco chunks deliver an extra dose of chocolatey goodness throughout. The coffee flavor is just enough to make this version different, but not so much that it overpowers the chocolate flavors. It’s like the coffee knows that he or she is not the star of the show and is happy to play a supporting role.

Anything else you need to know?

This Blizzard does not contain coffee straight from the pot but instead has coffee concentrate, which includes ingredients that I can neither pronounce nor define, like polydimethylsiloxane. According to Wikipedia, my one-stop-shop for all research, polydimethylsiloxane is the “most widely used silicon-based organic polymer due to its versatility and properties leading to a manifold of applications.”

Dairy Queen Oreo Mocha Fudge Blizzard Top

Now that I have cleared that up for you, I researched whether this Blizzard might have any caffeine. After minutes more of research, my answer is that it probably has little, if any, but I don’t really know. Judging by the mild coffee taste, I don’t think too much coffee concentrate is used, so I had to drink a can of Lightning Tornado Laser Super Turbo Energy Drink that I picked up at 7-Eleven to finish this review.

Conclusion:

In general, I think there are three types of Blizzard: ones that are just OK (with ice cream and candy/cookies/brownies a Blizzard can never truly be bad), ones that are solidly good, and then a handful that truly stand out, like the long-gone-but-not-forgotten Nerds Blizzard.

This one falls into the middle category. It’s not worth dropping what you are doing to head to DQ (especially since it will likely still be around in November as part of the fall menu). But it’s certainly worth ordering one the next time you visit.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: Small
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Small) 740 calories, 30 grams of fat, 17 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 340 milligrams of sodium, 108 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of dietary fiber, 84 grams of sugar, and 14 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Caramel Apple Pie Blizzard

Dairy Queen Caramel Apple Pie Blizzard Top

What is the Dairy Queen Caramel Apple Pie Blizzard

It’s one of the stars of the Dairy Queen Fall Blizzard Menu. It contains apple topping, pie pieces (or more accurately, pie crust pieces as I’ll explain below) and caramel coated truffles with vanilla soft serve and the obligatory garnish for all pies, whipped topping.

How is it?

Let me ramble a bit before I answer that question. I had high expectations for this Blizzard because I love me some apple pie. I’m not talking about grandma’s secret recipe pie with the steam rising from the top as it emerges from the oven. Yes, I’m sure your Gammy’s pie is delicious, but for some reason I’ve always been partial to the industrial strength versions.

The main reason I went to middle school every day (OK, most days, unless I could successfully fake a stomachache) was to get one of those tasty, sugar-loaded Hostess apple pies at lunch. And even now, I still tear up a little thinking about the long-extinct fried apple pie at McDonald’s, despite the real risk of permanent mouth injury caused by its hot-as-lava filling. This Blizzard reminds me of that Hostess/McDonald’s pie taste, without the latter’s third-degree burns. And the addition of the truffles make this something special.

Dairy Queen Caramel Apple Pie Blizzard Closeup 1

There’s so much going on with this Blizzard, but everything blends together beautifully. This certainly isn’t the best-looking Blizzard ever, and even when you take away the whipped topping, it’s ordinary looking. But as I learned in middle school when I wasn’t eating Hostess pies, don’t judge a book, or a Blizzard, by its cover.

Dairy Queen Caramel Apple Pie Blizzard Pieces

Because I am dedicated to my craft, I took the time to extract the three different pieces for you to examine (crust, apple, truffle from left to right). If it disgusts you to know that I had to suck and lick the soft serve off each piece, then just don’t read this sentence. I even dissected the truffle so you can see its guts spill out.

Dairy Queen Caramel Apple Pie Blizzard Truffle

The crust pieces maintain their crispness even while encased in soft serve, the apple chunks deliver a subtle but satisfying fruit flavor, and the caramel coated truffles are very indulgent with their ooey-gooey center. It seems like most new Blizzards either feature chocolate or some sort of berry as the main component, so this one also stands out for being unique.

Anything else you need to know?

Dairy Queen Caramel Apple Pie Blizzard Closeup 2

One of the other Blizzards on the fall menu, the Pumpkin Pie Blizzard, has “real” pumpkin pie pieces. But this one is worded a bit differently on the DQ website, which proclaims that it contains “apple topping” and “pie pieces.”

After perusing the list of ingredients and skipping over many, many words that I can neither pronounce nor define, I confirmed that the pie pieces here are indeed just pie crust pieces. That, of course, raises the question of whether a pie crust on its own is a pie, but I’ll let those more scholarly than I debate such topics. So to answer the question at hand — no, you didn’t need to know any of that.

Conclusion:

Dairy Queen Caramel Apple Pie Blizzard Closeup 3

The only thing that kept me from giving this Blizzard a perfect score is that the apple pieces are a bit small and rubbery, like they were harvested from a fruit cake. And if you take a bite that doesn’t contain a chunk of apple, there’s really no fruit flavor in the soft serve, so it might have been nice to get some kind of apple flavoring or sauce in there. But those are just minor grouses; overall, this is an exceptional Blizzard, and I’m happy it will be around all fall.

Purchased Price: $4.39
Size: Medium
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Medium) 930 calories, 37 grams of fat, 26 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 65 milligrams of cholesterol, 420 milligrams of sodium, 133 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 103 grams of sugar, and 16 grams of protein.