REVIEW: Kirkland Signature Chicken Strips

A glorious sign of things to come. Also, I like how Costco puts new on the board.

Costco’s food court is elite. The value is fantastic, the offerings are limited but finely curated, and I have shamelessly eaten a hot dog at 10 am.

The warehouse store chain has been rolling out, replacing, and testing quite a few new items lately – churro and double chocolate chip cookie swaps, streamlined pizza options (everything/combo pizza, I still think about you), and rotating sundae flavors.

Shhhh! They're sleeping.

The latest shake-up is the Signature Chicken Strips, which replaced the calzone. It’s five pieces with dipping sauce for $6.99. Look, I’m not Ben Wyatt from Parks and Recreation, so I have no strong calzone loyalties. A higher-protein option at Costco prices? I’m in.

Strips and sauce.

When I picked it up at the window, my first thought was “wow, hefty,” and that applied to the Costco-sized dipping cup too. A second sauce is only $0.79 if you want one, but you won’t need it.

The first one was a tad bit stringy.

The strips themselves were juicy, seasoned, and savory, with a solid breading-to-chicken ratio. Mine had some scorched bits, though you’d never know it from the taste. My one gripe: the texture on my first strip was a little tough and stringy, like cutting a steak with the grain instead of against it. All of it was still edible, and the remaining four were fine.

The breading itself had enough flavor that I didn’t need sauce to enjoy them. That said, I absolutely did dip anyway, because the sauce deserves a mention. It was honey mustard but slightly smoky – almost more like a honey mustard BBQ than your standard packet. I liked it better than just dipping it in ketchup, which is my usual go-to for chicken strips.

Why not? Dip a pizza into the chicken strips sauce.

I also dipped a pizza slice into it because I contain multitudes and because the food-hack potential here is enormous. My fellow foodies are going to have a field day with this one. All in all, not the best chicken tender I’ve ever had in my life but a really, really solid one. I wish I had brought my food scale because the value here is strong, as it is with almost all Kirkland offerings. I’m probably going to choose the $1.50 hot dog combo most of the time still, but I’ll definitely add this to my rotation of eats!

Purchased Price: $6.99
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 1130 – 1640 calories. No other nutritional information available.

REVIEW: Kirkland Signature Caramel Churro Sundae

Kirkland Signature Caramel Churro Sundae and its caramel swirls.

Costco’s Food Court menu is pretty consistent.

Yes, from time to time, a new item is added to the menu, but anything rarely sticks. Remember the cheeseburger? Remember the roast beef sandwich? Heck, because I need a good cry, I’m also going to mention the beloved and long-discontinued Polish Dog and Combo Pizza. Meanwhile, the cheese and pepperoni pizzas, hot dog, chicken bake, Caesar salad, smoothies, and sundaes have all been around for a long time.

Speaking of sundaes, unlike the food court menu as a whole, Costco Food Court’s dessert menu has seen a lot of change over the past six months with limited-time sundae offerings. The most recent is the Caramel Churro Sundae, which features vanilla soft serve, salted caramel sauce, and mini churro bites.

This sundae marks the return of the salted caramel sauce I first tasted with the Caramel Brownie Sundae a few months ago. In that review, I mentioned it wasn’t overly sweet, but also wasn’t salty or buttery. It’s a meh sauce, and that’s still the case here. It’s even more unnoticeable in this sundae, contributing little beyond its gooey texture.

Kirkland Signature Caramel Churro Sundae with its churro bites that are actual churros.

What dominates this dessert are the mini churro bites and their cinnamon sugar coating, which permeate the soft serve with a few gentle stirs. Seriously. I’ll scoop up a nice glob of the caramel sauce, and what I taste is pretty much just the cinnamon sugar. That’s how flavorless the caramel sauce is in this sundae, and I wish Costco used its chocolate sauce instead.

The churro bites are the saving grace of this sundae. They’re not tiny fried churro bites made by Keebler elves (or Kirkland elves), though they do leave a slight greasy taste in my mouth. They have a chewy texture that’s similar to the cookie dough gobs you’d get in chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, with a little crispiness from the cinnamon sugar coating. They carry the entire flavor of this dessert, and they’re the only reason it’s worth its inexpensive price.

If you love cinnamon sugar treats, you’ll enjoy Kirkland Signature’s Caramel Churro Sundae. But if you’re also hoping the salted caramel will tickle your sweet tooth, you’ll be greatly disappointed, which is pretty consistent with my previous experience with the sauce.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Purchased at: Costco
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 850 calories. No other nutritional information is available.

REVIEW: Kirkland Signature Double Chocolate Chunk Cookie

Ah, the Costco food court.

There’s nothing better than spending hundreds of bucks to stock your bomb shelter, then trying to weave your tank of a cart around the guy filling a soda cup next to his parked orange flatbed that has an IMAX-sized TV hanging off it.

I just want a hot dog the size of my arm. Sir, can you scootch over a bit?

Everything’s bigger in Texas? I beg to differ; everything’s bigger in Costco. I don’t even wanna ponder what a Costco in Texas must be like, my megalophobia can’t take it!

Ok, now that I got all that hacky “Costco be big” stuff out of the way, let me tell you about the new Double Chocolate Chunk Cookie they’re baking fresh in the food court. It be big. This edible frisbee measures 7 inches across and 1 inch thick while weighing in at a whopping 5.5 ounces.

The “all butter” cookie features both bittersweet and semisweet chocolate chunks, and I reiterate – I love the Costco food court. This is a quality cookie.

I was a little confused by what “all butter” meant at first. How could it be “all butter?” If it was “all butter,” it would be a stick of butter. What about the chocolate? Is that “all butter?”

Well, after I took a bite, I got it. This sucker is buttery, probably a little too buttery. That, coupled with the massive lakes of gooey chocolate, make this a cookie you’re probably gonna want to share. It’s really good, but a few bites go a long way. I ate mine in shifts.

The first few bites had a delicious “out of the oven” softness because they’re served hot and fresh. When I let it sit for a little while, the edges crisped up while the center remained soft and lukewarm. I ate the last third the next morning for breakfast, and it was firm but still chewy. I can’t think of three better cookie experiences texturally, with the middle shift being my favorite.

If you’ve ever bought a box of chocolate chip cookies in the Costco bakery section, these are pretty much just them on steroids. It’s what I expected, and it’s what I got.

So, if you like Costco baked goods, you’re gonna like this. Try one… half of one at most. Just be aware of the challenge you’re in for. I’m a grown man (questionable), so I don’t use the word “tummy,” but the thought of eating this cookie in one sitting makes my tummy hurt. The mere thought has devolved my stomach back to a “tummy.”

I really should stress again how big this behemoth is. I called it a frisbee earlier, but it could probably be used as a discus in the Ozempics – which is a food-based Olympics I’m workshopping and you’re rolling your eyes at.

As far as the loss leaders at the glorious Costco food court go, I still think the hot dog and pizza are king, but this cookie is superior to the churro it’s replacing nationwide. Just go for it. You already bought enough food to feed an army; what’s another 750 calories?

Allow me to lay down a challenge – buy two cookies and a kiddie pool-sized vanilla ice cream, then make the world’s thickest Chipwich. You won’t do it. … Coward.

(Please do it and report back… Coward.)

Purchased Price: $2.49
Size: ~5.5 oz
Purchased at: Costco
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 750 calories. No other nutritional info is available.

QUICK REVIEW: Costco Kirkland Signature BBQ Beef Brisket Sandwich

Costco Kirkland Signature BBQ Beef Brisket Sandwich

Purchased Price: $4.99
Size: N/A
Purchased at: Costco
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Lots of tender beef brisket. Hefty, filling sandwich. BBQ sauce has a pleasing peppery flavor. A surprisingly clean sandwich to eat thanks to the bun which doesn’t disintegrate and the lack of BBQ sauce. Buying toilet paper and frozen chicken at Costco. Don’t need to be a Costco member to buy it.
Cons: For 50 cents less, one can get three $1.50 Costco hot dog & drink meals. At times, the beef brisket tastes like beef jerky. Coleslaw could’ve been tangier and have more flavor. Could’ve used a bit more BBQ sauce. People blocking aisles at Costco just so they can get a sample of something.

Costco Kirkland Signature BBQ Beef Brisket Sandwich How It Stays So Neat

Nutrition Facts: Not available

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