A&W Sparkling Vanilla Cream Soda

Recently, I’ve been sucking down many of these A&W Sparkling Vanilla Cream Sodas.

I’ve been doing so much sucking that I feel like I’m either a baby sucking on a tit, a crack addict sucking on a crack pipe, or Paris Hilton making another sex tape.

I just have this “thing” for vanilla cream sodas, much like I have a thing for Rachael Ray, old school hip-hop, saying the word “incestuous,” and words that don’t start with “qu,” like Qatar, qanat, and qintar.

The A&W Sparkling Vanilla Cream Soda was very good, but it tasted just like their regular cream soda. Now I thought the “sparkling” would add something sparkling, much like how bubbles help champaign sparkle and glitter helps Sparkling Barbie look more like a stripper, but it didn’t.

The only thing different about this soda than the previous A&W Cream soda is the “Vintage Bottle,” which if you take off the label or stick in a small brown paper bag, looks like a beer bottle.

This means that with the amber-colored A&W Sparkling Vanilla Cream Soda and the “Vintage Bottle,” I can be a total poser at a party and pretend I’m cool with a “beer” in hand.

It’s much like when I was growing up and pretended apple juice was beer, bubble gum cigarettes were actual cigarettes, and my switchblade comb was an actual switchblade knife, which I used to try and recreate the fight/dance off scene from the Michael Jackson video for Beat It.

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin’ how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn’t matter who’s wrong or right
Just beat it, beat it
Beat it, beat it, beat it

Maybe it’s better that I be a poser with my fake beer, because if I drank as many bottles of beer as I have with the delicious A&W Sparkling Vanilla Cream Soda, I might end up passed out on my bathroom floor, lying in my own vomit, with a Sharpie mustache drawn on my face, and two arrows pointing to my mouth also drawn on my face with the words, “Stick it in the hole for a prize,” written on my chin.

Plus, someone would probably take pictures of me in this position and post it all over the internet with the word “0wn3d!” on it.


Item: A&W Sparkling Vanilla Cream Soda
Purchase Price: 99 cents
Rating: 4 out of 5
Pros: Damn good. Refreshing. Kind of addictive. If I take off the label or stick the bottle in a brown paper bag, it looks like I’m drinking beer, which in turn, makes me looking cool. My switchblade comb. Michael Jackson before the sleepovers and plastic surgery.
Cons: Not different in taste than the previous A&W Cream soda. Possible passed out drunk pictures posted on the internet.

25 thoughts on “A&W Sparkling Vanilla Cream Soda

  1. Ya, looks like good stuff, Marvo. I think I’ll keep an eye out for it. Thanks.
    Hey, we like the same stuff! Micheal before he went weirdo… (80’s music rocks, man!) and Rachael Ray! (Fake-eating be damned! She can “cook” for me any day.) I used to drink a decent amount of ginger beer too. How about reviewing one of those?

  2. Actually, I think A&W’s vanilla creme soda has a distince vanilla flavour. It’s one of my favorite sodas but it has been quite a while since I’ve had one. I might just have to pick on up next time I’m playing some scrabble. You do play scrabble, don’t you? Because if by some odd chance that you don’t, then you were born for it and ought to.

  3. I really like your blog, I found it when I read pajiba movie reviews, several link there seems interesting so i click on it, hell yeah i’ve been an addict to your bloq, could you please give archive of your previous review, coz sumtime i feel really lazy to keep clicking on previous page hehe.

  4. ga girl – The Henry Weinhart Root Beer bottle looks even more like a bottle of beer. If only root beer came in kegs.

    Pel – Don’t forget to put it in a brown paper bag. You’ll look cool or look like a homeless person.

    goodrev – pwned

    Chuck – Sickly sweet is supah sweet.

    DeAndre’ Upshaw – A drunk acting six years old at a church saying the F-word would be cool at the Church of Holy Shit.

    Webmiztris – Those who drink beer in green bottles?

    Sarah – No caffeine!?! That’s blasphemy! Must have caffeine in bloodstream. Less funny without caffeine. Actually, less funny with caffeine too.

    Genny From the Burbs – So do you have pictures of you as a toddler in a tub of beer? That would be messed up.

    Lucy – Vanilla has weird taste? What about vanilla ice cream covered with chocolate syrup on the abs of Brad Pitt?

    Andrew – Can I use Blingo to get me a free date? Or perhaps a free third-world country? Man, that would we sweet to be able to win a third-world country. I can wage war or sign peace agreements. I can make the Humpty Dance the National Dance and the rose the National Flower. Oh, that would be so sweet!

  5. rfduck – I think adding some vodka and pop rocks will make it special.

    Damon – Your comment has made me wonder something. I wonder what cream soda mixed with root beer tastes like? I think that shit must be frickin’ great!

    Karen – Along with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups and Cookies and Cream Ice Cream.

    klew – Yes, there is one in the entire state, but I have to drive 30 minutes (depending on traffic) to get there. I’ve never eaten there before. Oooh, I smell a road trip!

    TG – Eh, Rachael Ray is married now, so she’s kind of less hot now. But I don’t think she fake eats because she’s got a booty. Baby has back.

    Jeff – It’s been over a decade since I’ve had a Jones Cream Soda. The 7-11 down the street used to sell them and I don’t know of anywhere else on this rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean they sell them. Oh, I miss Jones Sodas.

    laina – Well if you did drink one at 3 in the freakin’ morning, the caffeine might’ve kept you up until 4 or 5 in the freakin’ morning.

    Zac – Just to let you know, Russian mail-order brides are expensive and usually they don’t understand English.

    Mir – Ginger beer. I personally prefer a Mary Ann Beer. Get it? Ginger and Mary Ann? HA! I’m so lame… :-(

    TheWarden – I’ve never seen ginger beer before. Sounds like something I would find in a natural foods store.

    Squiddy – You would think I like to play Scrabble, but for some reason I always get stuck with the letters Q, X, W, V, Z, W, and V all at the same time, and that frustrated me. Also, when I play Scrabble, I like to spell out swear words. Hey! They’re in the dictionary, so they’re legal.

    celly – Yeah, Pajiba is hella funny. Anyway, you can view all of the old reviews here: http://www.theimpulsivebuy.com/wordpress/complete-review-archive/

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