REVIEW: Starbucks Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino

Starbucks Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino-WM

I adhere to a lot of the unofficial guidelines for being a proper yuppy 20-something. I own a half dozen cardigans and am beginning to curate a “crazy” sock collection. I have business cards but only use them to try to win free lunches. I spend more time complaining about my deteriorating metabolism than actually figuring out how to adjust my dietary and drinking habits. And of course, I keep a Starbucks rewards card that automatically re-loads when my balance falls below $10.

Despite going to Starbucks a couple times each week to fulfill my yuppy responsibilities, I don’t think I’ve purchased a Frappuccino since my teenage years, when I would hang out at Starbucks to feel more grown-up. Back then, the Orange Mocha Frappuccino was a completely fictional drink, and I could reference Zoolander quotes all the time without getting weird looks. (My last realtor wasn’t amused when I said, “the apartment has to be at least… three times bigger than this!”)

I do have fond memories of those pre-yuppy, Frappuccino-drinking days, so I had high hopes for the newest version, the Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino. To make sure that I was judging the new Frappuccino on the right scale and not against, say, my usual Starbucks order (grande skim latte, no sugar, extra espresso shot if my first meeting of the day is before 9:00 am), I purchased a regular mocha Frappuccino to remind myself what these types of drinks taste like. And I was reminded that these types of drinks taste really good. If it weren’t for that stupid metabolism, I would totally start ordering these again.

Given that I apparently have the exact palate of my 16-year-old self, I would say that the Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino was better than the regular one, but really not by very much. The barista added three scoops of cookie crumbles and three pumps of chocolate mocha sauce to my drink. I think the crumbles were of some kind of Oreo-esque chocolate cookie, but it was honestly hard to tell what flavor they were because the taste of the mocha syrup was so much stronger. At first, the crumbles were underwhelming in their contribution to texture, too, since they were blended down to the exact same size as the ice. As the ice began to melt, however, the cookie crumbles allowed the Frappuccino to retain some crunchiness. Even then, the crunchiness was a little too close to graininess for my liking.

Starbucks Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino Closeup-WM

The real positive differentiator for the new Frappuccino was the chocolate whipped cream on top. Its hint of chocolaty sweetness made it more interesting than regular whipped cream, yet it remained much milder than the rich mocha flavor of the drink itself and acted as a nice change of pace.

Since the whipped cream was the part I liked best, I guess I should recommend that you forgo the extra cost of a specialty Frappuccino and just order any Starbucks drink with chocolate whipped cream instead of regular. Then again, all Frappuccinos are half-off from now until May 13 from 3 to 5 pm, so this is as good a time as any to try the Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino for yourself. Just be careful of the hordes of yuppies – our sock/cardigan combos might get too crazy for you to handle.

(Nutrition Facts – 16 ounces – 470 calories, 18 grams of fat, 12 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 260 milligrams of sodium, 76 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 69 grams of sugar, and 6 grams of protein.)

Item: Starbucks Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino
Price: $4.95
Size: Grande/16 ounces
Purchased at: Starbucks
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Regular mocha Frappuccinos are already good. Cookie crumbles added some crunchiness. Chocolate whipped cream was mildly sweet and a nice change of pace for the drink itself. Half-off Frappuccinos this week. Zoolander quotes.
Cons: Cookie crumbles didn’t add any taste. Crunchiness was too close to graininess. Lots of sugar and fat. Having the same palate as 16-year-old me. My metabolism. Complaining about my metabolism.

10 thoughts on “REVIEW: Starbucks Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino

  1. Just a friendly hint on the recipe from a soon-to-be ex-barista, after reading some of your notes:

    Mocha frappuccino: coffee, mocha syrup, milk, ice. Blend away. Top with vanilla whipped cream.

    The breakdown of a mocha cookie crumble frappuccino is: coffee, mocha syrup, vanilla syrup, chocolate chips, milk, ice. Blend away. Top with chocolate whipped cream and Oreo-ish cookie crumbles. Note that the cookie bits only go on top – if they were blended in it would get too soggy – hence why there are chips instead.

    If you like this but want less sugar, ask your barista to half the pumps of syrup that goes in each – or simply ask for a java chip (coffee + mocha + chocolate chips + milk + ice + regular chipped cream…almost the same, minus the vanilla and cookie crumbs) instead.

    Enjoy frappy hour and be sweet to your baristas!

    - K

  2. I was literally just about to write the same thing K did.
    Jasper if your barista really made your drink as you say, then he/she did it wrong. (fraps only get two pumps of mocha) You should totally go back and tell them and then get a Mocha Coconut Frappucino instead lol.

    Cindy, you can get a mostly sugar-free version, ask the barista for a mocha cookie crumble frappucino light, and then say you want the skinny mocha and sugar free-vanilla. Unfortunately you can’t get sugar-free whip cream or sugar-free chocolate chips but using the skinny mocha and sugar-free vanilla definitely cuts the sugar content down by a lot.

  3. I wanted to love it, but it was like the cookie monster had been constipated and found some exlax and used my cup as a toilet because the bathroom in my Starbucks was so filthy.

  4. I haven’t been to Starbucks in a long time, and this was the first drink that caught my eye. (With the little ‘New!’ bubble, of course, so I had to try it.)

    Wasn’t that great, but it wasn’t bad either. It tasted a little too much like regular Oreos- or chocolate chip cookies- mashed into tiny bits and blended with ice and water. I could taste a subtle hint of chocolate-y goodness when I got to the bottom, which made it taste slightly better.

    But then I spent the last six minutes trying to get the ice and cookies up the straw while simultaneously thinking ‘I should have gotten a caramel macchiato instead.’

  5. YUCK! the cookie crumble mocha frappacino is disgusting! its way too chocolatey and grainy. I dont even think I can finish my tall drink.

  6. Hey K may I ask, how much of each ingredient is needed? And would I have to use cold coffee? Or hot? And where might I find mocha syrup? Soorry for all the questions! Hope u can answer! Btw I looove this frap! It rocks!

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