Saint Patrick’s Day is coming up and it’s a great day to get drunk, get pinched, and get caught urinating in public.
However, no one gives gifts for Saint Patrick’s Day. So this month two lucky readers will each receive a Saint Patrick’s Day gift from The Impulsive Buy.
These two lucky readers will each win A BOX of the Extra Cool Watermelon Gum, which I reviewed the other week. It’s enough gum to last for weeks, unless you have a strong oral fixation and you also like to share, then it will only last you a couple of days.
Just like last month, I’ll be having two separate drawings. However, this month, one drawing is for men only and the other drawing is only for the ladies in the hizzouse. So one Barney will win a box and one Betty will win a box.
However, if you happen to be a hermaphrodite, I will enter you in both drawings. But if you are a hermaphrodite, and you win, you MUST show proof in the form of a doctor’s note.
To enter this monthâ€™s prize drawing, just leave a comment for THIS post with THREE THINGS.
1. The words “Hey! Nice watermelons!”
2. Whether you’re a male, female, or a hermaphrodite.
3. Whatever else you would like to say.
Please fill out the email field, because Iâ€™ll be emailing the winners for their mailing addresses. Donâ€™t worry about the shipping, Iâ€™ll take care of it.
The Impulsive Buy will start accepting entries for the drawing on Tuesday, March 14, 2006 and stop accepting entries on Sunday, March 19, 2006. Only one entry allowed per person. The drawing is ONLY open to those in the United States, US Military APOs, Canada, and Guam. (To the rest of the planet, I’m sorry.)
Fine Print: The Impulsive Buy promises your email address will not be used to send you spam about “lovely russian bittches in action.” (Yes, that’s how the spammers spelled it.) The Impulsive Buy also promises your mailing address will not be used to send you information about seminars that will improve your managerial skills. Bribes will not be accepted. The Impulsive Buy will not be responsible for lost mail, damaged mail, or Brokeback Mountain not winning Best Picture.