REVIEW: Jimmy Dean Jimmy D’s French Toast Griddlers

Jimmy Dean describes their Jimmy D’s breakfast entrees, which consist of french toast sticks with sausage, something that looks like a corn dog and these French Toast Griddlers, as “Satisfying, hearty breakfast to help kids do their best.”


I thought threats of taking away their Xbox 360; punishment in the form of them having to put on a clown costume and entertain the rest of the family; and using toys, candy and cold hard cash as bribes were the only ways to help kids do their best.

If all it takes is a microwaveable breakfast sandwich made from cinnamon glazed french toast and a Jimmy Dean turkey sausage patty to help children achieve their goals, then I’ve got parenting down pat. Bring on the women who wish to bear my children and I shall provide them with an ample supply of Jimmy D’s products and a standalone freezer.

If I fed my future illegitimate children these Jimmy D’s French Toast Griddlers and they helped my children do their best, I can imagine how successful they’ll become. With my genes, I’m sure they’ll accomplish amazing things, like become Walmart greeters, carnival game attendants, unemployed writers or repressive dictators of uninhabited islands.

Like the use of comic book fonts on the packaging, it appears Jimmy Dean used turkey sausage, instead of pork sausage, in their French Toast Griddlers for the children, who probably don’t need to consume twice the fat and saturated fat the pork sausages would’ve provided. But even if the sausages were made out of pork, the children probably wouldn’t notice as they stuff it down their gullets as they get ready for school to be the best that they can be.

Most children would probably enjoy the sweet and salty combination of the cinnamon flavored French toast with the turkey sausage. It’s like a poor child’s McDonald’s McGriddle. It’s also a healthier child’s McDonald’s McGriddle, since it has three times less fat, saturated fat, sodium and sugar than a Sausage McGriddle.

However, I’m not a child, I’m just a man who watches Ni Hao, Kai-Lan on Nick Jr. to help me start conversations with the workers at the Chinese restaurants and shady places I frequent, and I think the French Toast Griddlers are bland. The turkey sausage doesn’t have the same quality flavor and spice as Jimmy Dean’s pork sausage and the cinnamon glaze on the French toast isn’t pronounced.

The sausage patty is slightly smaller than the French toast buns and both are easy to bite through after being microwaved for 85 seconds. There’s also an egginess to the French toast, which makes me wish there was also a layer of scrambled eggs in this sandwich.

If Jimmy Dean wanted to make their French Toast Griddlers better, they could use Jimmy Dean’s flavorful pork sausage and, perhaps, sweeten the French toast with syrup, but, of course, adding all of that would create a satisfying, hearty breakfast to help kids do their best…to get fat.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 sandwich/102 g – 210 calories, 70 calories from fat, 8 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat*, 60 milligrams of cholesterol, 390 milligrams of sodium, 27 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 6 grams of sugar, 8 grams of protein, 2% vitamin A, 2% calcium and 10% iron.)

*contains interesterified soybean oil and hydrogenated soybean oil

Item: Jimmy Dean Jimmy D’s French Toast Griddlers
Price: $7.49
Size: 4 pack
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Individually wrapped. Ready in 85 seconds. Uses healthier turkey sausage. Eight grams of protein. Helps kids do their best. Learning Chinese via Ni Hao, Kai-Lan.
Cons: Bland. Turkey sausage is less flavorful than Jimmy Dean’s pork sausage. Cinnamon flavor is too light. My future illegitimate children becoming Walmart greeters, carnival game attendants, unemployed writers or repressive dictators of uninhabited islands.

12 thoughts to “REVIEW: Jimmy Dean Jimmy D’s French Toast Griddlers”

  1. I’m seriously considering bearing Marvo’s spawn because I’ve always wanted to have my own standalone freezer. And if I feed the child nothing but the Jimmy Dean stuff the baby daddy stocked it with, I’ll soon have an empty freezer and an empty house because social services will take the kid away.

    Hmmm…not seeing a con to being Marvo’s baby mama. I mean, it’s a standalone freezer!

  2. I like the clown suit punishment, very original. Your future kids will have lots to talk about should they ever need therapy. 🙂 This product’s picture actually looks pretty tasty, although I usually rely on McD’s for my unhealthy breakfast foods. Perhaps this would be a good, and less unhealthy, substitute.

  3. I love Jimmy Dean products, but I have to say the turkey sausage with the franch toast is awful. I looked everywhere to get this product and then I couldn’t eat them. Wow, how about real sausage, not turkey. The franch toast was excellent, but this is an expensive product that went to waste for me. I will never buy this product again or any Jimmy D turkey product. Bad time to waste that money.

  4. Au Contraire … I have tried these — delish! Very tasty and great for those mornings that time is short short short.

    Healthy enough too so I don’t feel guilty. I added just a sprinkle of cinnamon sugar (a pinch, not a cupful.) to the top before nuking. YUM.

    The point of these is that if you are used to eating full on fat pork sausage with everything in it except the oink and maple flavored sugar syrup laden fare — these will not taste the same. But if you are a healthy eater for the most part or just trying to live longer and healthier – these are a great addition your food list.

    These are $4.59 at my local Target for a box of 4 and quite often on sale for $2.98 and $3.49 … and Jimmy D has a 75 cent printable coupon on their website to boot.

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