Hey! McDonald’s Hot Mustard Sauce! This is not what it looks like. I know it looks like I’m having an affair with your sister, McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce, but I assure you what you see before you is just an accident.
Yes, I can explain why Hot Habanero Sauce is all over my McNuggets. Um…Well, we saw each other and wanted to give each other a hug but while we were walking towards each other, she tripped and her top came off. When I noticed she tripped, I ran to her to try and catch her, but I also tripped and my McNuggets fell out. Since we were falling towards each other, she accidentally ended up on my McNuggets.
Why would I cheat on you Hot Mustard Sauce? We’ve been together for decades and you know I love you.
Okay. Okay. So I’ve cheated on you a few times before. But I didn’t leave you for any of them, so they meant nothing to me. I’m sure if we add it up we’ll find I’ve been loyal to you 99.5 percent of the time. And if you round that up, it’s 100 percent.
Do I think Hot Habanero Sauce is hotter than you? Sure, she’s a six or seven, while you’re a two or three, but you’re older, and you know what they say, “The older the berry, the sweeter the juice.” Hey. Hey. Don’t cry. I mean, you’re hot too, but in a different way.
Oh, I can’t lie to you anymore, Hot Mustard Sauce. All right…You got me! I was cheating on you with Hot Habanero Sauce. But in my defense, I couldn’t help myself because she’s younger, hotter, creamier, and I have a thing for redheads. She even has freckles. Freckles drive me wild!
But after trying the McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce, I realized that you’re still the one that I love to touch. Still the one and I can’t get enough. We’re still having fun, and you’re still the one.
Yes, I just recited song lyrics. I’m sorry.
Did I enjoy myself with Hot Habanero Sauce?
Um, it was fun spending time with her and she’s definitely the hottest item McDonald’s has ever released. She didn’t make me cry, like other habanero products I’ve tried, but after getting through the first container, she made me sweat a little, my nose a little runny, and suggested I drink some soda. I don’t want to experience that every time with my McNuggets, even though she’s quite tasty and a little tangy. But I guess she should be tasty since she’s your sister.
Please don’t leave me, Hot Mustard Sauce. I love you and I promise I’ll never put anything else on my McNuggets ever again.
Psst. Hot Habanero Sauce. Call me.
(Nutrition Facts – Not available on website.)
Other McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce reviews:
An Immovable Feast
Item: McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce
Price: Free with McNuggets meal
Size: 0.78 ounces
Purchased at: McDonald’s
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Really good flavor. Younger and hotter than Hot Mustard Sauce. Hottest item McDonald’s has released. Good balance of flavor and heat. Hot Mustard Sauce is hot too, but in a totally different way.
Cons: Cheating on Hot Mustard Sauce…again. Reciting song lyrics when you don’t know what to say after gettting caught cheating. Might not be hot enough for some heat heads.