Tag: Fast Food

REVIEW: Sonic Espresso Shake

Brandon 8 Comments

Sonic Espresso Shake Cup

I consider myself a late adopter of “hot, caffeinated beverages.” I didn’t become a regular coffee drinker until my early 30s, and never had an espresso until a couple of years later.

This is probably why I’m not generally one to opt for coffee, mocha, or espresso-flavored inclusions to my other foods or beverages. Mocha turkey sandwich? Pass. Coffee-rubbed pepperoni on my pizza? No thank you.

One exception to the “dear coffee, please do not mate with my other food” rule are sweets. Coffee — and its coffee-adjacent friends — lend themselves quite naturally to things like cakes, pies, and ice creams. And because a milkshake is but ice cream and milk, it only makes sense that one might infuse it with a caffeinated beverage.

Sonic Espresso Shake Top

Enter Sonic’s new Espresso Shake. According to Sonic’s website, its shake blends vanilla ice cream with “original cold brew iced coffee,” which, okay, I know I’ve established I’m a novice when it comes to hot go-go juice, but aren’t “coffee” and “espresso” two different things? I mean, espresso is coffee, but it’s generally made in a different way and is a far more concentrated substance. But I guess like me, maybe Sonic doesn’t have an espresso machine, and so here we are.

Sonic Espresso Shake Straw

Sonic’s shakes, for the uninitiated, are usually pretty consistent with their viscosity. They’re somewhere between “sucking this hard on the straw hurts my cheeks” and “this is a bit too runny to warrant a spoon.” In other words, optimal milkshake consistency. What is also consistently good is Sonic’s ice cream, which is perfectly creamy and perfectly sweet.

Now that brings us to the flavoring. If Sonic has an issue with frozen drink construction, this is it. With my first taste, my thought was, “Oh, hey, I like this.” The espresso flavor was much milder than I’d been anticipating, though certainly present. (And after reading on the website how they make it, I guess maybe now I know why it was so muted.) My second and third sips were fairly similar, but the fourth left me wondering, “Wait, what happened to the slight coffee taste?” It had disappeared, and I was left with nothing more than a creamy vanilla milkshake.

This went on for a few more sips from the straw, and then, boom, another coffee pocket. Now, I understand that I might not get a blob of banana in every drink of a banana shake, but how Sonic can make a liquid add-in so hit or miss is perplexing. It would have been almost impressive, really, had it not been so disappointing. I wanted more coffee taste, not less.

Perhaps making the milkshake with coffee ice cream would have upped the wow factor. (Or, for that matter, given it a wow factor.) Maybe I should have gone with the Oreo Espresso Shake because don’t Oreo pieces make most things more palatable? As it stands, I’m not sure I’d order the Espresso Shake again — not with so many other Sonic shake options at my disposal.

Purchased Price: $3.19
Size: Small
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Unavailable on Sonic’s website

Click here for our previous fast food reviews.

REVIEW: McDonald’s Blueberry Muffin, Apple Fritter, and Cinnamon Roll

BrandonP 21 Comments

McDonald s Blueberry Muffin Innards

The McCafe brand has been an undeniable success for McDonald’s all around the globe. Its expanded coffee offerings have allowed the company to keep up with Starbucks with the added benefit of establishing a retail brand visible in the coffee aisle of grocery stores.

You can pull up to the drive-thru speaker and order a large, iced, non-fat Caramel Macchiato with an extra shot of espresso, hazelnut syrup, a chocolate drizzle, and whipped cream while also getting a McNuggets Happy Meal with a Buzz Lightyear toy for your kid. But if you ever craved a treat to accompany your obnoxiously complex McCafe drink, you were usually left with the choice of a handheld apple pie or a rather uninspiring chocolate chip cookie.

McDonald’s has wisely decided to expand its once meager baked goods selection by introducing the McCafe Blueberry Muffin, Apple Fritter, and Cinnamon Roll.

The Blueberry Muffin comes surrounded by a lovely tulip-style muffin wrapper to help distract from the fact that it was handed to me in the same bag as a packet of tangy bbq sauce. The muffin is adorned with a streusel crumb topping and a sprinkling of crystallized sugar that adds a really nice, subtle crunch when consuming.

McDonald s Blueberry Muffin

It is very tender and moist with somewhat sparse but delicious blueberries mixed throughout. There is a slight aftertaste of either a preservative or artificial flavor that I find common in boxed blueberry muffin mixes. While I would have to say that it is borderline too sweet for a blueberry muffin, I think the texture and overall flavor make it a nice addition to McDonald’s menu.

McDonald s Apple Fritter

Apple Fritters are never much to look, and the McCafe offering is no exception. It’s a brown, bumpy mound with a glazed outside that gives way to a dense center with abundant swirls of cinnamon. When biting in, you instantly get the warm cinnamon filling your mouth, followed closely by the tart apple flavor.

McDonald s Apple Fritter Innards

The light icing adds just the right amount of sweetness, and the dense but tender texture is perfect for a fritter. As one of my favorite treats, I love an apple fritter to have a crispy edge, which this did not. It could also benefit from more abundant apple pieces. But this is the treat I’ll be craving next time I pull into the drive-thru.

McDonald s Cinnamon Roll

The Cinnamon Roll looks the part, served warm with deep valleys of sugar and cinnamon in between the swirled dough and enough cream cheese icing to run down the sides but not flooding the entire roll with an overwhelming sweetness. From the moment I first tried to cut off a piece, I could tell that the outside had gotten tough, no doubt from being reheated.

McDonald s Cinnamon Roll Innards

Perhaps it once had that ideal slightly doughy, gooey center, but lost it in the microwave, sacrificed for the sake of quick service. It is a real shame that the texture is too tough because the cinnamon flavor and the cream cheese frosting are spot on, with the overall level of sweetness being just right. As a big fan of McDonald’s Cinnamon Melts, I can’t help but wish the company just revived it instead because it is a far superior product.

Purchased Price: $1.99 (Blueberry Muffin), $2.19 (Apple Fritter), $2.49 (Cinnamon Roll)
Size: N/A
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Blueberry Muffin), 9 out of 10 (Apple Fritter), 5 out of 10 (Cinnamon Roll)
Nutrition Facts: Blueberry Muffin – 470 calories, 22 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 35 milligrams of cholesterol, 360 milligrams of sodium, 64 grams of carbohydrates, 36 grams of sugar, 2 grams of fiber, and 6 grams of protein. Apple Fritter – 510 calories, 29 grams of fat, 12 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 360 milligrams of sodium, 58 grams of carbohydrates, 28 grams of sugar, 3 grams of fiber, and 5 grams of protein. Cinnamon Roll – 560 calories, 17 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, 35 milligrams of cholesterol, 490 milligrams of sodium, 92 grams of carbohydrates, 46 grams of sugar, 8 grams of fiber, and 9 grams of protein.

Click here for our previous fast food reviews.

REVIEW: Church’s Chicken Sandwich

Brandon 13 Comments

Church s Chicken Sandwich Wrapper

Sometimes, I forget that Church’s Chicken exists.

And I do not mean this as a slight to what is arguably one of the more popular fast food fried chicken restaurants in the United States. (In 2018, there were 1,000+ Church’s locations, which put it behind places like KFC and Popeyes, but ahead of shops like Zaxby’s, Bojangles, and Raising Cane’s.)

It sometimes takes me driving past a Church’s to remember that Church’s is a place. And then I go, “Do they have these everywhere?” And then I think about Kendrick Lamar saying, “Park it in front of Lueders, next to that Church’s Chicken” in “Backseat Freestyle,” and I go, “Well, they have them in Compton and in Kansas City, so, yeah, probably everywhere.”

All this to say, I’m usually well past the Church’s by the time I consider stopping. And that’s a shame because, if you didn’t know, Church’s has the absolute best biscuit in fast food fried chicken. The secret, you see, is that they slather them with honey butter right when they come out of the oven. I’m not exaggerating when I say I could happily eat seven or eight of them in one sitting. (And then feel very terrible about myself, sure, so I won’t. But it’s a fun thought.)

And it is this very same honey butter that Church’s hopes will set it apart from the competition as it joins the Great Fast Food Chicken Sandwich War that Popeyes started in 2019.

But does it work? Let’s discuss.

Church s Chicken Sandwich Pickle

Aside from the honey-butter brushed brioche bun, the rest of the setup is pretty standard chicken sandwich fare — dill pickle slices, a slathering of mayo, and a chicken breast filet. As with most competitors, Church’s offers an original and a “spicy” variety. The latter includes, you guessed it, spicy mayo, and in an interesting twist, a pickled jalapeño pepper that Church’s suggests “squeezing” over the filet, “San Antonio-style.” (I’m serious. The steps are all right there on the website.) Anyway, for the sake of this review, I went with the regular one.

Church s Chicken Sandwich Split

The filet itself was a little bit bigger than Chick-fil-A’s, but a bit smaller than Popeyes. It had more of a crunch than either, which was nice. That said, it didn’t have as much flavor, either. It is a relatively muted chicken, with little discernible seasoning beyond salt and garlic powder. It was very juicy, though, which definitely scored it points.

The pickles were boring fast food pickles. They provided a nice acidity, but they were floppy and chewy, almost entirely void of crunch. Similarly, there was too little mayo on the sandwich for me to notice what kind of impact it may or may not have had.

Which leaves us with the bun.

Church s Chicken Sandwich Top

This soft, sweet pillow of delight is what sets this chicken sandwich apart from the pack. Think King’s Hawaiian wedded with a nice stick of butter, and you’re on your way to imagining this taste. The bun could have used a bit more toasting — it was chewy around some edges — but overall, it was an A+.

So, while the chicken itself was only moderately above average, and the other two inclusions were boring and lacking, the bun elevated the entire experience to new heights, giving fast food fans a welcome new chicken sandwich option.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: N/A
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 651 calories, 34.5 grams of fat, 7.18 grams of saturated fat, 63.7 milligrams of cholesterol, 1,770 milligrams of sodium, 53.4 grams of carbohydrates, 3.36 grams of fiber, 8.49 grams of sugar, and 31.79 grams of protein.

Click here for our previous fast food reviews.

REVIEW: Jack in the Box Unchicken Sandwich

BrandonP 8 Comments

Jack in the Box Unchicken Sandwich Sign

Which came first, the chicken or the pea protein isolate?

Domesticated chickens date back to 2000 BC, but peas were present a few thousand years before that. When considering whether those peas were dried, milled, wet filtered, and put in a centrifuge to extract the protein… I’m going to just give the chicken a win. And Jack in the Box is giving the chicken a win too, sparing them from its new offering, the Unchicken Sandwich.

Jack in the Box is currently testing the Unchicken Sandwich only in restaurants near Reno, NV and Monterey, CA, making them just the second major fast food chain in the US to test plant-based chicken. This follows KFC’s Beyond Fried Chicken tests in 2019 and earlier this year. Jack in the Box has partnered with Raised & Rooted, a subsidiary of Tyson Foods, to bring its Unchicken Sandwich to the meatless crazed masses.

Raised & Rooted advertises its chicken alternative as a blend of pea protein isolate, bamboo fibers, egg white, and golden flaxseed. The breading is Jack’s recipe, available in original and spicy. I opted for the latter.

Jack in the Box Unchicken Sandwich Lettuce

Aside from having a plant-based patty, the sandwich offers the standard accompaniments of a toasted split top bun, mayonnaise, lettuce, and tomato. My sandwich came with what can only be described as an aggressive amount of lettuce. While Jack in the Box is usually generous with lettuce, it seems it may have gone overboard to compensate for the very thin Unchicken patty.

Jack in the Box Unchicken Sandwich Spicy Coating

Upon my first bite, I was immediately hit with an intense amount of spice. As someone who is often disappointed by the lack of spice in fast food offerings, the strong cayenne and paprika flavor from the crisp breading offered a welcomed punch. The plentiful amount of lettuce, along with the tomatoes, worked well to help cool down the heat.

Jack in the Box Unchicken Sandwich Split

If I was not cued to the fact that it was a plant-based sandwich, I don’t think I would question that it was anything but a thin, processed chicken patty sandwich. The grain-like aftertaste you get when tasting the patty alone is masked quite well by the spices in the breading. On close inspection, the Unchicken is denser than most chicken patties. But when eating the sandwich together, it is remarkably similar to the texture of chicken.

Having tried plant-based burgers and chicken nuggets in the past, Jack in the Box’s Spicy Unchicken Sandwich takes the top spot as the most convincing imitation. Keeping the patty thin and having a crisp, spicy breading really hides any shortcomings that come from utilizing a chicken alternative. If you’re inclined to eat a more plant-based diet, this is definitely one to try.

Purchased Price: $5.49 (sandwich only)
Size: N/A
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Not available.

REVIEW: Subway Frank’s Red Hot Buffalo Chicken

Brandon 13 Comments

Subway Frank s Red Hot Buffalo Chicken

To fully understand Subway’s plight, first, think of the worst thing that has been written about you in the press over the past few years. I’ll give it a second… okay, good.

Next, compare that to the sandwich maven. Earlier this month, the Irish Supreme Court ruled that Subway’s bread has too much sugar to be considered bread. A 2017 Canadian Broadcasting Corporation investigation that found its chicken contains less than 50% actual chicken DNA. And then there was that uh, one guy. You know, the one who lost a bunch of weight and then his freedom.

But there is a lot to be said for convenience (think of all the Subways squished into gas stations on desolate stretches of endless American interstates) and the general laziness of people too tired to make their own sandwiches.

And speaking of laziness, allow me to introduce you to the sub-sandwich mega-chain’s newest offering, Frank’s Red Hot Buffalo Chicken sandwich. Subway says, “this sub includes our tender chicken strips and new Buffalo sauce, made exclusively with Frank’s Red Hot sauce, toasted on your favorite bread and topped with fresh lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers and ranch dressing.” For the sake of standardization, I ordered mine exactly as they suggest. The bread on the app defaulted to “Italian,” but I ended up with whatever the plainest, whitest, most unimaginative bread offered is.

Subway Frank s Red Hot Buffalo Chicken Innards 1

If you’ve ever had a Buffalo chicken sandwich from any other purveyor of food, you’ve already had this thing, only better. That said, it wasn’t 100% garbage. First, I’ll tell you what I liked: the bread was big and soft and would have made a very cozy sweater. Again, it didn’t taste like much, but it was pleasant to touch. The veggies were very fresh, which, I’ll admit, surprised me some. The lettuce was crisp and the cucumbers added a nice crunch. The tomatoes were small and inoffensive. If things would have stopped there, this sandwich would have been a 7. (And also, very unfulfilling.)

But they didn’t stop there.

Subway Frank s Red Hot Buffalo Chicken Innards 2

Subway suggests that its “new buffalo sauce” is made with Frank’s Red Hot sauce, but to be honest, it just tasted like they mixed up some of Frank’s Buffalo Sauce with a dash of Frank’s Hot Sauce. Though the goopy result added a nice kick, there wasn’t enough of it to give you a real “buffalo wing” experience. Similarly, the ranch added very little. It was there, but quickly lost its footing around the hot sauce, muting the heat and failing to provide any nuance.

And then, the chicken.

Subway’s bird-meat is unnaturally soft, weirdly slippery, and tastes like what an extraterrestrial might guess chicken tastes like just from looking at a chicken alone. There is almost no flavor to it, and it is unsettling how it almost disintegrates in your mouth. Were it not for the occasional bit of gristle, I might have wondered if I hadn’t been tricked by tofu.

And really, tofu would have been much preferred. This sandwich made me uncomfortable, and that’s generally the last quality I look for when grabbing lunch.

Purchased Price: $8.49
Size: 12-inch
Rating: 3 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (12-inch sub) 710 calories, 24 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 110 milligrams of cholesterol, 2720 milligrams of sodium, 79 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 47 grams of protein.