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One year ago today, the first ever review was posted here at the Impulsive Buy, which was for the almost drinkable Natural Citrus Listerine. Since then, the Impulsive Buy has posted 217 product reviews. However, 212 of them suck.
It’s been a fun and interesting year here at the Impulsive Buy. Over the past year, I’ve shown a video of me stripping, ate salads for a week, deep throated a banana, removed all the hair on my legs, ate vomit jelly beans, attempted to consume the entire McDonald’s Dollar Menu in one sitting, and outed Lucky the Leprechaun.
I’ve also tried some horrible products, like the overly-peppery Salt and Pepper Pringles, the Philly-disrespecting McDonald’s Philly Cheese Steak Sandwich, the puke-looking Maruchan Creamy Alfredo Ramen, the dog food-like Carb Well Golden Crunch Cereal, the powerless and tasteless Kellogg’s Tiger Power Cereal, and the diarrhea cha-cha-cha inducing Ruffles Light Potato Chips.
But I guess I should be glad I didn’t eat these.
Good times. Good times.
I’d like to thank all of you who come by on a regular basis to read whatever crazy nonsense I write. I hope that I’ve entertained you, educated you, and saved you some money. I promise that I will continue to write nonsense, be your guinea pig, and shove things down my throat that I shouldn’t.
Now to celebrate the Impulsive Buy’s first anniversary, I’m going to take the rest of the week off and I’m going to hold the most kick ass prize drawing in Impulsive Buy history.
Okay, okay. I know I said that for the 100th review prize drawing, but this one will be even better.
Three lucky readers will each receive one mystery box containing various products the Impulsive Buy has reviewed over the past year. The contents of each box will vary. For example, one may have the diarrhea cha-cha-cha inducing Ruffles Light Potato Chips and another may not.
To enter the Impulsive Buy’s First Anniversary Prize Drawing, just leave a comment for THIS post with whatever you want to say. Please make sure you fill out the email field because I’ll be emailing the winners for their mailing addresses. Don’t worry about the shipping, I’ll take care of it.
The Impulsive Buy will start accepting entries for the drawing on Tuesday, August 9, 2005 and stop accepting entries on Sunday, August 14, 2005. Only one entry allowed per person. The drawing is ONLY open to those in the United States and US Military APOs. (I apologize to the rest of the world, but shipping the mystery box to anywhere else would be REALLY expensive.)
The winners will be determined by using a big mixing bowl, three aluminum pie pans, a can of whipped cream, and slips of paper with the email of each entrant. All the entries will be placed into a big mixing bowl and canned whipped cream will be sprayed on top of the entries. The contents of the bowl will be mixed.
When the entries and whipped cream are mixed well enough, the mixture will be equally divided into the three aluminum pie pans. I will stick a candle into one of the whipped cream pies, light it, blow it out, and then remove the candle.
Then, with my hands behind my back, I will pull out an entry from each of the three whipped cream pies, using only my mouth. Those three entries I pull will be the three winners of the Impulsive Buy’s First Anniversary Prize Drawing.
Good luck!
Fine Print: The Impulsive Buy promises your email address will not be used to send you spam about how the woman or man of your dreams is waiting for you online. The Impulsive Buy also promise your mailing address will not be used to send you life insurance policy applications. The Impulsive Buy will not be responsible for lost mail or your fiance boinking the nanny.
Oooo! Enter me! I want the mystery box!
Congrats on your blogoversary!
i think you ought to have an additional contest to see what gets deep-throated next! LOL
Hmm…whatever you want to say. :)
Congrats though
Hey Marvo, congrats on your one year anniversary. Want me to send you some more jerky to celebrate it properly? :) Talk to ya later!
Marvo! Happy First Year Anniversary! Congratulations on maintaining the best blog on the Internet. I look forward to many more product reviews. Aloha and Hakuna Matta Ta (I know that isn’t Hawaiian….)!
you say it’s your birthday, it’s my birthday too!!
YAYAY!!!! Happy Blogiversary!!! I have enjoyed all of your reviews and am eagerly awaiting more!
oh, and feel free to enter me in the contest as well :)
As a writer, I’ve spent many pleasured hours here at the Impulsive Buy rather than working; thank you so much for being here, and congratulations on being here an entire year. Here’s to many more!
I can’t believe it’s been one year already *tear* Everything you said is true. Keep doing a good job marvo! WE LOVE YOU!!!
Congrats! Oh and enter me into yer contest/sweepstakes – i looooooooves me some free stuff… exept free warts…. i dont like those very much
i have always wanted to try those ruffles i enjoy torture
oooooh mystery box. so mysterious.
congrats on 1 year! it’s been great. and as consolation prize to all those who dont win, and because we have to wait a WHOLE WEEK for another review, i think we – your loyal readers – deserve a video of the prize drawing.
Choose me! I like to win things! Thanks!
Happy Birthday, Impulsive Buy!
I’m so happy to have found your site in time to enter this exciting contest. Congratualtions on one year of blogging…….
Congratulations! You’ve done a swell job keeping us entertained. Will you make a QT movie of the, um, drawing for the mystery boxes?
Congratulations on one year! I agree that we should have pictures/videos of the prize drawing – I think that would be quite the sight. Enter me in the drawing! Free stuff! Free stuff!
Happy Blogiversary!
Congratulations! I heart your blog.
Congratulations on a wonderful year! I hope there are many more to come!!
Happy Bloggerversary! This is one of the best blogs on the net!
You could teach those dudes over at Consumer Reports a thing or two…THEY never made a razor dance.
Ooooh….count me in. I’m always in for a good mystery box.
Congrats! Mystery boxes are my favorite…count me in.
I like my chances much better with a random drawing than if I had to be witty…
w00t. Keep it up, good stuff….
Oh the mystery… I will be on the edge of my seat untill I find out what’s in the mysterious boxes. PICK ME!
Congratulations! You have both educated and informed me, and perhaps made me want to order jerky on the internet.
Wow thats a lot of reviews!
Marvo, you are a rough in the diamonds.
Enter me first!
This looks fun, i hope the mystery box has a big question mark on it like mystery boxes and bags on tv.
Now if i would of only gotten a mystery bag of crap from Woot.
oooh- di-ah-re-ah cha-cha-cha!! who doesnt love a good poop? send it my way…
Happy Blogiversary!
Haha, I love your method for determining the winners!
Marvo, I must say, you have kept me entertained every morning here at work with all the crazy but funny product reviews you’ve done! I’m glad I found you!!! hehe. Anyways, thanks again, you’re awesome!
Happy Blogiversary! Please send me a tall, dark, handsome man in a box!
thanks for a great site marvo. you always start my day off with a laugh.
Kings and queens and bishops too, want to wish the best to you. So wish-day, wash-day, wednes-day, blogday. Ooh happy blogday.
Happy Blogiversary! I am waiting for my present!
If that mystery box would happen to include a picture of your finger attached to the Nitro vibrating razor, I am totally into it :0)
Sign me up, baby!
Happy Anniversary! Here’s to many many more!
It is so cool that you have been around for a year. Congratulations. I read every day and can’t wait to see what year 2 has in store!! Happy Blogversary.
Congratulations and Happy Blogiversary!
ooooh! count me in! I want some anal leakage inducing chips!!
You crack me up! Enter me to win the mystery box and if I do, I’ll send you a bunch of Australian stuff that you’ve never tasted! You can review them and bug the crap out of people because they can’t buy them themselves!! HAHA!!
your blog rocks. read it everyday while I should be working! Congrats on the anniversary!
congrats to you marvo, yours is one of the few blogs I try to read every day… here’s to more crazy product reviews!
i love reading your reviews
happy blogirthday
Marvo, you rule like nobody’s business. But actually EVERYONE’S business, if you see what I mean. And I mean that you have a public website. Happy Blogiversary!
YAY for you!!!!!! Happy birthday blog!
Wow, I would love to win your mystery box. Reading your blog daily keeps me from jumping out the window, of course, it is only a single story, but I am sure that it could cause one hell of a grass stain if it ever happened.
Mystery box sounds good to me.
Hi!
Enter me too, ok. Is the “Mystery Box” vegan? I hope it is, and that I win it. *smiles*
I’m a bit concerned that the whipped cream will ruin the ink on the address slips, but I trust you’ll figure it out.
I’d never seen the stripping video before. I’m all sweaty now. ;)
Congrats… Thanks for all the belly chuckles. Keep them coming.
I want to win the mystery box!!!!
I only discovered your site a month ago but it immediately became one of my daily must-visits. Keep up the good work!
Go maire tú an lá!
Or congratulations in Irish Gaelic. I used to know the birthday song in gaelic, but you’ll have to settle for…..
Go Impulsive Buy! It’s your birthday!
You are too funny! Happy anniversary. Hope it’s the first of many.
Congrats, hopefully many more years to come!
Happy Blogiversary!
Yay! Congratulations! This is such a fun site.
hmm… whatever i want huh? well, i got nothin. i just want free stuff.
…oh yeah, happy blogiversary, anniversary, birthday, whatever the hell it is…
Enter Me Please!
Love The Site!
Best Product Reviews Around.
Sounds Like Your Going To Have Some Fun Picking The Winners!
I love you.
i want in on your blogiversary giveaway but i’m in canada. very close to the border, though!! and does it help that i’m cute? ;) oh well. happy blogiversary. i visit every day because i’m a bloggie-addict and your posts are hilarious. i’d like to try all the things you try, but then i’d be extraodinarily plumpy.
One year of consistency is rare in the blog world. Congratulations, and I wouldn’t mind some free crap.
Ooo..Oooo. pick me! pick me!
Happy Birthday! Let the next year bring cheer!
Happy anniversary! Thanks for giving me something to do at work other than pesky work.
CongrrrrrrrrrrrrRATS! on the big “one”!
You consistency and dedication is inspiring. I hope for your sake that you are able to use it to make a living for yourself too, it would be a shame to use so much dedication only to get ingestional problems from odd foods. But in the meantime reading about the ingestional problems is good entertainment for us!
Woo! Pool party!
Happy anniversary! I saw Almond Joy Lime in the company vending machine today and thought of you. I’d just send one off to you to see if you’d review it, but it’s pretty hot here and the only thing that might be worse than lime-flavored Almond Joy is a melted lime-flavored Almond Joy.
Ohhh, I wanna enter!
Congratulations! I look forward to receiving my prize, or at least seeing a video of you pulling names out of the cream pies.
I would like to try something new. Pick Me!
Happy Blogiversary! You do an awesome job
I have another suggestion for how to use a can of whipped cream, a big mixing bowl, three aluminum pie pans, and slips of paper with the email of each entrant… better yet, if you are ever in the middle of the third largest state, I could just show you. I’ll give you a hint, we throw out all save one item.
However, since you are on a mid-Pacific rock, happy Blogiversary! I love what you do.
congrats! i knew you could do it!! oh ok, i dont really know you, but it sounded good…
Congratulations. my little circle only discovered you a few weeks ago. I don’t think we are ready to go a week without our fix. Thank god for the archives!
Oh my, almost missed your blogoversary.
Congrats on your first anniversary! I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog (it’s one of the few actually WORTH reading). I hope you continue to have fun reviewing products for us. I can’t wait to see what you review next.
I like pie!
Congrats on your 1 Year Anniversary!!! Maybe I’ll win something for it… hint, hint, wink, wink, mystery box…
wow, one year of reviewing! Congrats!
Put me in the drawing for the mystery box.
BTW I stumbled upon your site about 3 months ago, upon reading the review I immeadiately(Within a week) read every other review. You did save me money (I almost bought the salt and pepper pringles) and you’ve made me laugh (The leg shaving and the condom on a bannana). Thanks.
Happy anniversary. You are the golden G in Blog. Or something. Mystery box.
marvo, we go way back… way way back… it feels like i’ve known you forever… so long that, you might find my name to come to the top of the drawn names list… because we’re such good old friends n’ all…
anyways, your ass doesn’t taste that good to kiss, so i’ll cut that crap…. but count me in for the drawing… and please, send me those other condoms you have left if (and when) my name is drawn :D…
oh yeah, good work on the site too… i guess….
Happy Anniversary – love your site!
Congrats on your 1 year blogiversary. I bow to the MASTAH!
Congrats, and thanks for testing all this stuff out!
Mystery box? If it’s got the Rectals… I mean, Ruffles Light, might as well call it the ’shit-stery box’.
“BOO! PUNS SUCK!”
Sure, enter me in the contest. Arrgh.
Read my blog!
Pick me to win the contest!
Uhm… Don’t do drugs!
Add me to the list for the box o’ mystery!
Hey Marvo! Congratulations! Please senter me into the super cool drawing. As a present I would love to send you something to eat and review from New Orleans. What do you say?
Congrats on the one year mark. It only gets easier from here!
No, wait.. it gets much, much harder.
Whoa, I’m comment number 99!
That video made me giggle… a lot. I don’t think I was reading your site yet when that baby was posted. I vote for more of those haha. ;)
happy anniversary, the impulsive buy … i’ve been laughing very hard and been very informed for some time now! keep up the great work! =)
Way to go Marvo, the only thing I check more frequently is my email, and your blod is better. It’d be the first time I won something cool…
Very merry un-birthday. ;)
Happy anniversay!! The first anniversary is traditionally paper(but extra products work too)
Oh, by the way, happy first year. You deserve a copy of Katamari Damacy.
And a fine anniversary it shall be. I’ve only recently started reading here, but I’d be fairly willing to bet that I’ll read next year’s anniversary post, as well.
Good stuff, this.
Hey Marvo,
Congrats on the 1 year anniversary, here’s to another year of product reviewing.
P.S. This is my Entry
It’s been a year already? wow! Congratulations! You should celebrate with one of your favorite reviewed products, if it’s still around.
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday dear Impulsive Buy
Happy Birthday to you
Since discovering your site you have kept me entertained. Now with the box o’mystery I can pretend to be you!! Oh be still my beating heart I’m so excited
Darn I’m from the Philippines so I don’t qualify. ANYWAY that’s fine. Just wanted to greet you a happy blogsary and do keep on posting. You are one big dose of entertainment, amusement and information for me.
Hmmm…can I just be the judge and assist you? I’ll make sure that your hands are tied tightly behind your back and watch you dunk your face into whipped cream…yummy. =) heh he. Love ya Marvo!
Happy Blogiversary! ANd I disagree that 212 of the reviews suck. It’s only 210 of them that suck.
Nah, they’re all good, my friend.
Uh- I’m lucky 113 it looks like! Happy Blogiversary! I want presents!
Wow.. what a lot of work to draw MY name *grin*
Love your site… funny and USEFUL too!
Mia
Suh-wheat! Count me in. I have been so inspired by your site. And happy blogiversary!
I want to win. What happens though if you pull two out of the same pan at the same time. Will the one with more whipcream left get eaten, and the other one win?
Marvo – Happy Blogiversary! While I’ve only been reading a few short months, my life has been changed by The Impulsive Buy. I could go on, but I’ll leave it at that. *hugs*
Happy Anniversary!!!
:)
Please enter me! Sweet!
Happy Anniversary!! Enter me for the free stuff!! THanks for the entertainment!!
Well I am totally impressed. I came to you via Blogzie and boy am I glad she directed me here. Hope to read more and more and more. You inspire!
sweet site!
sweet contest!
congrats on the mile-marker. keep up the good stuff because lots of us out here appreciate it. don’t get all lame on us and start updating infrequently, and then eventually just give up entirely. if you do that i will hunt you down and kick you in the shins.
Ooh! I want a big box o’ free stuff!
Yay! Congrats, you constantly have me laughing…
hey good times… congrats yo…
I stumbled across this website about a week ago, and my life has never been the same…but in a good way! Keep up the good work!
Aw heck, throw me in a pie. I’m not sure I want a razor vibrator, tho …
I just found this website a couple weeks ago while doing a search to find out what the heck chicken fries really were. The night I found it I ended up just reading your reviews for like 2 hours. I wish I’d found you sooner! Thanks for making me laugh!
Congrats on the 1 year anniversary. You crack me up…
I’ve added you to my favorites list. Congrat’s on the fab year! Your process for drawing the winning e-mail addresses could only be enhanced by taking pictures of the event.
keep it real for many more…
woohoo!!!!
I want to win… :( I never win anything.
Except for free books at my library. But only ones I already have.
PLEASE!!!! PICK MOI!
ahhhh, no blow me this time?
Congrats! … and I personally think that AT least 200 of them were awesome.
Happy anni-blogi-whatever.
I second what k@os said.. and holy sheet this is a lot of comments.
MOST COMMENTS EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…. yay i’m drunk!
Happy Blogiversary. Squared.
Hey
happy 1 year!
I just stumbled across your site, and it’s amazing. Honest product reviews are great, and these are helpful and hilarious.
Congrats. I’ve bookmarked your site months ago, with no regrets.
Great job.
“Whatever you want to say” hmmm….batteries are the connection to all the modern conspiracies.
I’ve never been to your site before, I heard there was a prize though…so hand it over and I’ll get out of here. And uh happy, merry something…yeah
Oh yeah and I want to see the video of the picking of the winners
I liked your letter to Darius Rucker the best.
Consgratulations on this your first year anniversary!!
Came thru via Kaos!
:-)3T
Happy Blogiversary! Its been a constant source of giggles reading your “educational” reviews. PS: The guys at burger king didn’t appreciate me ordering a box of fried tampons.
Hey!
congrats on a full year!
Hey if you ever want to test sex toys just hit me up bitch.
I just pray that I am one of the lucky three to end up in your mouth!
Hey man, happy 1 yr . I just stumbled onto your site a few days ago, trying to find out what the hell BK’s chicken fries were and found the site hilarious. And I just noticed someone else did the same thing from looking at your comments just now. wow. weird.
I just discovered the website, and I’m about as horrified as I was by “Steve! Don’t Eat That!” Great work! I’d love to win a box of mystery stuff!
ooh… mystery box? sounds intriguing…. HAPPY BLOGIVERSARY!!! may we all be blessed with another full year of excellence in product review. ;-D
I have a box but I could always use a mystery one!
Kick it!
I would love to be entered! I just came across your site after I read a review of it on yelp.com by Kevin S. I must say it’s choking on your milk, spraying it out of your nose funny.
An email friend sent me your site awhile ago. Since then I’m addicted!!! Some of your posts are so funny, I laugh out loud SO loudly, even my dogs look at me weird. “Has she finally gone nuts or what?” Happy Annniversary! And please, enter me in the contest. I would love to get a box of unknown goodies, or…..errrrrrr maybe baddies!
Keep up the great reviews, sometimes your reviews are the only thing that make me laugh that day.
Its been a great year! Now I want a prize!!
Guten Tag!
I think your site is fabulous and have recommended it to many of my friends. Keep up the good work and congrats on the Anniversary! Hip hip hooray!
Love your site and the reviews! Happy Blogniversary! Please enter me in the drawing.
Happy Blogiversary, Blogday, Blogsmas, Blogannakuh? Whatever. I hope you post pictures of the name drawing.
Ooh I missed you stripping… HOT I tell ya!! Please enter me in the contest. Happy Anniversary!!! Your blog rocks!! ;)
Uh….test…
I totally dig what you’ve been doing with this blog. Although I haven’t been a fan long, it’s just because I only recently found your site. *grin*
Congrats on your longevity–here’s hoping that your blogging days are far from over! I’ll keep reading if you keep posting.
Aaagh, that Mystery Box sounds awesome.
Just found your site… very entertaining! Congrats :)
I don’t want to enter your drawing, btw. I just wanted to comment…and I couldn’t because (I think) I was typing an html special character so it wouldn’t turn kaos’s name into a link. Well, F him. His name will get spelled out without the at symbol.
I was going to say something about how our little Marvo is growing up, yet in only a year, you still managed to post more than me…but, well, now I’m just going to use this time to tell you that I’m flying out there on Saturday, and in between hospital visits, I plan on stalking you and kidnapping you with the help of kaos, wired and macsamurai. ;)
I just want to be the 163rd person to comment on here.
Wow, has anyone checked up on Marvo? Where the heck is he, all of a sudden?
i think he has been kidnapped i miss him
Congrats on the one year anniversary. I love your site!
LOVE LOVE LOVE the site. I will continue to read :o) you sometimes end up being the topic of dinner conversations since my husband reads you too :o)
Anyhoo, please include me in the drawing.
Dude,
Congrats on one of the funniest sites out there! I recently was turned on to your site and I am addicted! Can’t wait to see your future reviews!
Woot.
Count me in on the “Mystery Box” I have been reading your blog for a couple months now and I always check in to see all the new stuff you are checking out and to see whether I should buy it!!! Congratulations on your Blogiversary!
Criminy! — 170 entries so far?? Man, your pies are gonna be fluffy wonders of creamy wood pulp! Please do enter me in your contest; and, in case the paper gets really soggy from all the whipped cream, if you see a slip of paper with an email address of mlllhllnnnn@@ggggmaillllll.co~ then it’s probably mine.
Happy, happy blogoversary, dearest Marvo. Your reviews and your antics always brighten my day. Yahtzee!
I [heart] the impulsive buy (will kissing up help?)
Please enter this jolly good fellow in the contest!
Thank you very much!
I have to say your blog kicks ass! It is by far the funniest blog I read.
Happy Blogiversary!!!
Congratulations!
I leave my mark upon this vast field of posts, hoping I get sent a box.
Hook it up Marvo!
Pick me! Pick me! Pick me!
Happy Blogiversary!
*eats chocolate yogurt*
Eh…. its semi-good.
Happy Blogaversary, happy Blogaversary, happy blogaversary, HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPY blogaversary! Please enter me in the mystery box drawing/pie eating contest. I LOVE this site, it is a guaranteed giggle as well as highly informative to boot.
I’ve never posted before, but I’ve been an avid fan for a long time, now. It seems whenever I need a review of something, you’ve got it- you had that BK chicken stick review thing up before I even saw the commercial. By the way, Marvo sounds like some kind of underground semi-superhero name, like your secret weakness is actually a bigger deal than any of your powers are. Anyway, your anniversary is the same as me and my boyfriend’s, and considering we’re madly in love, I think that bodes well for your blog.
I have enjoyed your reviews.
Happy Blogiversary!!! :)
Happy blogiversary!
If I somehow get chosen for a prize again from this post, give it to the next person. I’m still enjoying my condoms.*
*I haven’t opened the box of condoms yet.
Has it been a year already?
Lord knows you’ve saved me both money and tastebuds on more than one occasion.
Wow, that is a lot of comments to scroll through. I hope I’m not too late to enter the contest, if I am, have a happy Blogiversary anyway. :)
Congrats, and keep it going. You’re a daily read in our household, more often than the local paper.
I got hooked on your blog about 3 months ago. I have sent a link to all of my friends. Keep it up, I am dissapointed if it is not updated daily.
Aaron
i just love reading your blog… its filled with great reviews, and dont forget the funny! keep it up for another year!
cool site. i’m in for the contest I hope. I know it’s sunday now but…
pLEASe
with sugar
on top
*eats Oreos*
Where’s Marvo?
i canna pusher any haaaarderr!
let’s hit the 200 mark…
oh yeah, put me in the draw!
(thought maybe if i post multiple times i’ll get multiple entries into it)
Entries for the prize drawing are no longer being accepted.
Thank you to all those who participated and thank you to everyone who sent me an anniversary congrats.