Del Taco Crispy Jalapeno Rings

“Why would we fry a jalapeno?”

That was the response I got from the first Del Taco I went to. And it pretty much sums the crazy world of the fast food arms race that we live in. It took me four Del Taco’s and a gallon of gas before I finally arrived at a location that sold these mysterious treats. The Del Taco’s that don’t sell these looked at me like I was either insane or pulling a stupid prank. The Del Taco that did sell these things pimped them out like Christmas had come early. They are red and green, I suppose.

After realizing that I put far too much time and effort into finding something that most stoners have already made at home, I was finally able to try one of these crispy rings. My first mistake was popping one in my mouth while I was driving back home. Not only did the oil scorch my soft palate, but the combination of heat and fat managed to squeeze through my blood within a matter of seconds. I clutched at my heart as I felt a sharp sting run through my chest, nearly barreling off the road.

Don’t eat these while you’re driving.

I somehow made it home and opened the bag to find a meager box of deep-fried jalapeno slices that looked pretty sad and lonely in there. I looked through the rest of the bag incredulously, wondering why I paid $1.79 for what amounts to three jalapenos and a tablespoon of flour and water. I eventually got over it and ate a few more pieces before my body forced me to stop. The slices have been pickled, so you’ll get some moisture once you bite past the crispy-as-advertised outer batter. Other than that, they’re just fried jalapenos that will almost certainly give you nausea or a stomachache if you eat the whole thing.

I should note that it comes with what is advertised as a white “secret sauce” that looks and tastes just like Trader Joe’s tahini sauce. That is to say, it pretty much tastes like watered down yogurt. I would tell you what it tastes like with some ranch dipping sauce, but Del Taco doesn’t have that and basically shut me down when I asked. Bastards!

Stick with jalapeno poppers for now. They might not come in festive colors, but at least you’ll have some cream cheese to cheer your up.

Item: Del Taco Crispy Jalapeno Rings
Price: $1.79
Purchased at: Del Taco
Rating: 4 out of 10
Pros: Batter stays extremely crispy for a while. Jalapeno slices are plenty spicy. Comes in two colors.
Cons: Pricey for the amount you get. Special sauce does not taste very special. The feeling inside of your body after consuming deep fried jalapenos.

8 thoughts on “Del Taco Crispy Jalapeno Rings

  1. Is there anything we won’t batter and deep fry these days? If you ever get these again you should ask for the secret sauce to be deep fried too.

  2. I’m going to stick with JITB Jalepeno Poppers for when I want to contribute to my possible future heart disease. I think they’re pricier than these, though…about $3 for 7 deep fried cheese stuffed poppers.

  3. Boy these sound great I love anything fried and may eat over 30 of the with some fried mozz sticks and some onion rings WAIT WHATS THAT TINGLING IN MY LEFT ARM…….fade to black

  4. I keep getting Del Taco and Taco Del Mar mixed up. Del Taco is the one I don’t have on this rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, and I guess I’m not missing out.

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