According to the Kellogg’s Ice Creme Sandwich Pop-Tarts box, they have “25% Less Sugar Than Leading Toaster Pastries.” But if I’m not mistaken, aren’t Pop-Tarts the leading toaster pastry?
Or did I get sucked through a wormhole and end up in an alternate universe where Pillsbury Toaster Strudels are the leading toaster pastry and The Situation is a fat nobody from New Jersey who got his nickname because the person who enters the bathroom after him will end up in a bad situation?
Wait, let me tolerate MTV and TMZ to find out if I went through a wormhole.
Nope, still in the same universe where The Situation has six-pack abs, Snookie is still orange, there’s a particular hot tub in New Jersey that surprisingly can transmit STDs and Pop-Tarts are the leading toaster pastry.
But if I were in an alternate universe where Toaster Strudels were the ruling toaster pastry, the statement “25% Less Sugar Than Leading Toaster Pastries” wouldn’t be true, because most Toaster Strudels have nine grams of sugar, while these Ice Creme Sandwich Pop-Tarts have 11 grams.
So it seems Kellogg’s is admitting, in a slightly misleading way, that most of their Pop-Tarts are, as Def Leppard likes to say, sticky sweet. But at least these Ice Cream Sandwich Pop-Tarts have 25 percent less sugar than other Pop-Tarts, which have 15-17 grams of sugar. Although unfrosted Pop-Tarts, which I’m surprised still exist, have around 13 grams.
Twenty-five percent less sugar is fine and dandy, if you’re a mother trying to prevent your child from getting hyper or turning into The Situation from an alternate universe, but having less sugar makes the Ice Cream Sandwich Pop-Tarts the most insipid flavor Kellogg’s has ever offered, and that includes unfrosted Pop-Tarts and Vanilla Milkshake Pop-Tarts.
These Pop-Tarts had the potential to be really good because I loves me some ice cream sandwiches, but the vanilla filling wasn’t filled with vanilla and the chocolate crust was chocolame. I tried them every way possible, as if I broke out the Kama Sutra of Pop-Tarts eating. But no matter how I tried them, they were still disappointing. Maybe if they artificially flavored them a bit more they would be enjoyable, but with the way they are now I’d really like these Ice Cream Sandwich Pop-Tarts to melt away.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 pastry/48 grams – 190 calories, 45 calories from fat, 5 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 1 gram of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 180 milligrams of sodium, 33 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein and a bunch of vitamins and minerals.)
Item: Frosted Ice Creme Sandwich Pop-Tarts
Size: 8 pack
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 2 out of 10
Pros: 25 percent less sugar than the leading toaster pastry, i.e. Pop-Tarts. Contains vitamins and minerals. Use high fructose corn syrup. Kama Sutra.
Cons: Worst Pop-Tart flavor ever. Vanilla filling wasn’t filled with vanilla. Chocolate crust was chocolame. TMZ. MTV. The water in the Jersey Shore hot tub. Entering the bathroom after The Situation from an alternate universe uses it.
23 thoughts to “REVIEW: Frosted Ice Creme Sandwich Pop-Tarts”
Ummm seriously..when you grab a poptart is how much sugar that it contain really on your mind? Hell no….you eat a poptart because you want a tasty sweet treat (for me it would be treat for others it is called breakfast). Curious though, what ways did you try to make this poptart?? I only have toasted them before…
There’s toasted, frozen, straight out of the wrapper, the Lotus and a bunch of other ways that involve some flexibility.
But they spell “shoppe” the old-timey way so they must be good.
I wonder what’s the old-timey way of saying sucky.
Flavor most foul?
Seeing the flavors of these that you have been reviewing, I think that Pop-tarts need to be positioned differently as a product. Instead of being presented as a breakfast “toaster pastry”, they should be seen as a sweet and stocked with the Oreo cookies.
It’s like Pop-tarts are closeted about their true nature as absolute snack food junk. Come out of the closet already and declare your lack of any nutritive value whatsoever with pride, Pop-tarts!
I also think the name Pop-Tarts should be changed. It’s been awhile since I’ve had a tart Pop-Tart.
a 2 out of 10? for serious? i’m not a huge fan of poptarts, but i have never had one that tasted like a 2. uh, i don’t think. but that’s pretty bad. i’m sorry for your taste buds. bah.
Thank you for your concern for my taste buds. They are doing fine and will make a full recovery.
I had the lower sugar hot fudge sundae variety. I didn’t think they were too bad. If these are worse than unfrosted; they should be taken off the shelves immediately.
I tried the Hot Fudge Sundae Pop-Tarts when they first came out and they became one of my favorite Pop-Tarts flavors. I wonder since they have less sugar would they slide down my list of favorites.
These are pretty much identical to the recently removed Vanilla Cream pop tarts. They changed the name and reduced the sugar. That said many pop tart fans loved the vanilla cream so these should do well. I think they are the best pop tarts out there. The cream is still sweet and sticky and I like rubbing it on my face like a porn star
Porn stars like to rub it on their boobs.
Vanilla pop-tarts just don’t sound tasty to me, no matter which way you slice it (or freeze it, or toast it.) I guess I like my pop-tarts old school, with fruit filling and preferably toasted. Although I have them very rarely.
I haven’t had the old school flavors in awhile. I think when I go to Target I shall pick some up and relive the 1980s.
Why aren’t they real ice cream sandwiches? Why aren’t they filled with ice cream?
(I prefer the unfrosted version, they’re not easy to find.)
Why aren’t you writing to Kellogg’s?
I’ve been thinking about slapping a layer of ice cream in between two of them, but that means I would have to buy them again. 🙁
I loves me some toaster strudels.
So you’re saying these could also be re-released in a year as the Oreo pop tart?
I hope not. But I do hope Nabisco makes some Oreo toaster pastries.
Tell me more about this Kama Sutra of pop tarts eating. I understand toasted or not toasted. How else could you eat them?
I’d list them, but you would feel so hot, like a Pop-Tart straight out of the toaster.
I love pop tarts and this flavor! 10 out of 10!
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