REVIEW: Dunkin’ Bacon & Cheddar Omelet Bites

Dunkin Bacon  Cheddar Omelet Bites Tray

I’ve eaten many an egg bagel in my day, but eggs shaped like little bagels?! What is this madness?

Yeah, I’m not gonna lie, Dunkin’ got me to try its new Bacon Cheddar Omelet Bites mostly because of the shape. Seeing egg bites with a donut hole somehow filled the massive hole in my ever-aging heart.

It takes a lot to get a dedicated Bread Head™ like myself to order eggs without some kind of carb surrounding it, but I had to find out if these were as good as they looked.

As it turns out, I’m a fan. Sure, the expectation of the menu picture didn’t quite match the reality of what I got, but I still found the presentation to be pretty fun.

Dunkin Bacon  Cheddar Omelet Bites Both

The bites come in a serving tray with a fork, but have enough structural integrity to hold in your hand if you wanna be a weirdo and eat them like the holed out treats that preceded them.

The egg is cooked sous vide, and it made me realize that I’ve never had eggs that way. I’m not sure I’ve ever had anything sous vide, and I honestly don’t even know if I’m using it right in a sentence – I uh, I don’t know how to write sous vide. … Sue me. I’m what the French call, “les incompetents.” I’ll just be an uncultured dummy and use the English translation, “under vacuum.”

Guess what? “Under vacuum” eggs taste pretty damn good.

Dunkin Bacon  Cheddar Omelet Bites Fork

They had a slightly mushy almost potato-like texture that might not be for everyone, but I genuinely enjoyed it. It was as if they took the filling of Pillsbury Breakfast Scrambles (the savory Toaster Strudels) and rolled it into a patty. The flavor was very similar to me, but it was also right in line with what you know and love from Dunkin’ or most other fast food breakfast menus.

The cheddar and bacon definitely pop. The cheese is blended perfectly into the egg, so there’s no ooze to worry about. I’d say the bacon leans towards that artificial “bacon bits” taste, but it’s fine. Those are good too.

Dunkin Bacon  Cheddar Omelet Bites Single

I’m glad they used this gimmicky shape, because I’m not sure I would have gravitated towards them without it. I’ve seen omelet bites at other places like Starbucks, but never gave them a second thought.

So yeah, these are fun and satisfying. They’re a really good source of protein also, which I appreciate.

Dunkin’ is also selling an egg white and veggie variety. I might try them at some point, but I’m definitely going back for the Bacon Cheddar bites. Even though they stand on their own, I’d like to see if I can try to slide these between two little biscuits. It might end up being an overwhelming starch bomb, but I know it’d be delicious. Hopefully they release more of these with some crumbled sausage next time.

After the speed bump that was the Mini Pancakes, it’s good to see Dunkin’ innovating the “mini” food game once again. You’ll never go wrong with a Munchkin, a mini bagel ball, or a couple of these new Omelet Bites.

Purchased Price: $4.14
Size: 2 Bites
Purchased at: Dunkin
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 280 calories, 19 grams of fat, 10 grams of saturated fat, 0.5 grams of trans fat, 185 milligrams of cholesterol, 520 milligrams of sodium, 7 grams of total carbohydrates, 2 grams of total sugars, and 17 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Kellogg’s Eggo Frosted Maple Flavor Pop-Tarts

Eggo Frosted Maple Pop Tarts Box

Oreo seems to get all the hype, but I’m not sure any snack brand has had more flavor variations over the years than Pop-Tarts.

Sure, I could probably look that up and get you exact figures, but I’m too lazy. After all, I DID eat a Pop-Tart for breakfast today.

To be fair, Pop-Tarts may be a “lazy” breakfast, but they are the KINGS of lazy on-the-go breakfasts, and that’s exactly why I’ve always appreciated them.

Don’t feel like putting forth even the slightest bit of cooking effort? Grab an ol’ reliable Pop-Tart. You’ll still feel like you actually ate breakfast, especially now that they’ve teamed up with another breakfast staple, Eggo.

A handheld pastry that tastes like Eggo waffles? Sounds like a hall of fame “lazy” breakfast to me.

Eggo Frosted Maple Pop Tarts Frosting

Well, it sounded like one at least…

I wouldn’t necessarily say these BURST with flavor. They do a decent job toeing the line between the two familiar experiences each brand brings to the table, but I’m a little baffled.

I wanted to be waffled.

Eggo Frosted Maple Pop Tarts Split

You get some maple syrup, but it’s cut with that very distinct Pop-Tart crust taste and texture. Imagine pouring Pop-Tart crust batter into a waffle iron. It tastes wayyyyy more like Pop-Tart than waffle, to the point “Eggo” just feels there in name only. “Eggo” must only be repping the maple flavor because these only kinda taste like Hint o’ Waffles.

There’s a dab of “butteriness” in there too, which I liked. I thought maybe the yellow icing was butter flavored, but upon isolating it, it just had a generic sugary flavor. I guess that butter also came from the crust, and maybe that’s ultimately where the “waffle” plays in.

Pop-Tart pastry is just the dominant flavor, even more so than the maple filling and icing, which makes these kinda bland overall. They smell like maple, though, which is always a welcome aroma.

Eggo Frosted Maple Pop Tarts Toasted

I’m not a huge toasted Pop-Tart guy, I usually just go pouch to mouth, but this seemed as good a flavor as any to eat warm. The toaster didn’t really improve the experience, but hey, at least I managed to burn my palm on the scolding hot icing!

So yeah, whether you lazily eat your Pop-Tarts right out of the pouch or toast them, these just come away tasting like mildly sweet Maple Pop-Tarts. They’re not terrible. They’re mid-tier, and I like them better than the Maple Bacon flavor from a few years ago. That being said, they’re still disappointing since they almost accomplished what they set out to do.

I bought 16 of these things, so they’ll stick around for a bit, but I don’t necessarily mind knowing I’ll have ’em there for some future lazy mornings. I may even get adventurous and use them as bread in an egg and sausage sandwich at some point… if I have the energy. Meh, maybe I won’t. Who knows? I’m going to take a nap.

Purchased Price: $4.14
Size: 16-pack box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 380 calories, 12 grams of fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 330 milligrams of sodium, 67 grams of total carbohydrates, 30 grams of total sugars, 0 grams of fiber, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Garlic Parmesan Combos

Garlic Parmesan Combos Bag

What are Garlic Parmesan Combos?

The ‘bos are back in town, this time in the flavor of garlic bread.

How are they?

Garlic Parmesan Combos Copy

I imagine most people enjoy the taste of garlic bread, and Garlic Parmesan Combos do a pretty good job mimicking that flavor profile. That being said, you’ll probably also need to be a big fan of hard, horrific smelling cheeses to really enjoy these. More on that later.

I usually prefer pretzel Combos to the baked cracker cylinders, but the crackers did a great job as a bread proxy. They’re basically as salty as the pretzels too, which I appreciated.

Garlic Parmesan Combos Innards

The filling is exactly as advertised. It’s a cheesy, garlicky clump of dry mud. If spread on a loaf of bread, it’d be gross but would probably taste how you’d want snackified garlic bread to taste, with perhaps more cheese flavor than you’re accustomed to. It was definitely a bit too much for me.

The garlic didn’t bother me, but that cheese…

Anything else you need to know?

Garlic Parmesan Combos Bowl

I mean, look, I knew what I was getting into, but the filling smells awful. Garlic and parmesan aren’t exactly scents you’d want to burn a candle of, but it’s so much worse than I expected.

I basically held my breath before popping each one in my mouth. I called them “‘bos” as a joke, but I think I now know what the “BO” stands for.

It stinks (literally) because they do actually taste good. The smell was just so hard to overcome. If I walked into an Italian joint and caught a waft of garlic and parmesan, I’d probably find it appetizing. Something about that smell coming off that weird Combo paste nearly made me sick.

Conclusion:

Garlic Parmesan Combos Ooze

It probably didn’t help that my bag had a loose asteroid of filling just floating amongst the crackers like a bag of inverse silica gel, but I really couldn’t get over that rancid smell. It knocked the score of these otherwise tasty snacks down 4 whole points.

Maybe I’m just too sensitive? If you’re one of these maniacs who pop provolone cubes like Tic Tacs, these may not bother you. You’ll most likely enjoy the taste, but just know that if you eat a bag, you might want to steer clear of society for a day or two because you’ll probably reek.

Purchased Price: $2.39
Size: 6.3 oz.
Purchased at: Wawa
Rating: 4 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 oz) 140 calories, 7 grams of fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 300 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of total carbohydrates, 3 grams of total sugars, 0 grams of fiber, 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dunkin’ Pancake Minis

Dunkin Pancake Minis with Syrup

Pancakes have never quite translated to the fast-food world.

Outside of the “hot cakes” McDonald’s used to slap inside giant Styrofoam cloches, I can’t even think of a traditional pancake I’ve seen on a menu.

French Toast Sticks? Sure. McGriddles are kinda like pancakes, but not quite. What else am I forgetting?

One thing’s for sure, I definitely don’t remember ever eating a pancake from Dunkin’.

Well, lucky for us(?), Dunkin’ figured out how to bring pancakes to the menu with the use of its patented Munchkinizer™ technology. Introducing Pancake Minis!

According to Dunkin’, “Pancake Minis includes six mini pancakes filled with maple-flavored bits, served warm with a side of syrup.”

Dunkin Pancake Minis Plated

A few key words really struck me – “maple-flavored bits.” Yes! That’s how you sell a pancake at Dunkin’, mimic the McDonald’s McGriddle cake. You’re telling me I can eat mini poppable McGriddles and add even more syrup if I want too?!

… Oh you’re not? Oh. That’s disappointing.

Don’t get your hopes up. The pancakes desperately need the syrup. Any sweetness just tastes like a teaspoon of sugar was added to the batter. Without strong “maple-flavored bits,” this entire concept is DOA. Unless you’re planning on dining inside a large Dunkin’ restaurant, these are pointless.

Few foods on Earth get colder faster than a pancake. These pancake Pogs get colder even faster than that! They won’t travel well.

I’m a car eater, but I also despise getting sticky, so opening and dunking into a syrup cup in my car isn’t ideal. You’re playing with fire even if you’re parked. The drip threat isn’t worth the risk.

Dunkin Pancake Minis Dip

“How hard is it to not spill syrup, you buffoon?” Ok, fair enough, but in all honesty, the pancakes don’t even taste that good even if you slather them with the Mrs. Butterworth syrup.

They didn’t even stay hot for 30 seconds, and I watched the employee just pull 6 of em out of a drawer. He shuffled them like poker chips then nuked em for 30 seconds. Ok, he didn’t shuffle em, but something about the whole process was still a bit off-putting. This is a nitpick though as I’m sure plenty of places like this prepare foods similarly.

Dunkin’ is great at “mini.” Munchkins are iconic, and those bagel balls are a really good on-the-go snack, but these are just ill-conceived. Pancakes aren’t a quick snack, and they didn’t even try to get creative.

These are basically the Eggo minis in the freezer section, but at least you can make those at home.

Dunkin Pancake Minis

If you’re dead set on pancakes, just go to your local mom and pop breakfast spot instead. You’ll find the time, most people wolf pancakes down in 5 minutes anyway.

The portion size is good and they have 10 grams of protein, but Pancake Minis aren’t worth it. Something tells me they won’t be “selling like hotcakes.”

On a scale of “dip to skip” these are a skip. Just wait for McDonald’s to make “Liddle McGriddles.” ™ Vin. Hit me up, McDonald’s.

Purchased Price: $2.49
Size: 6 pancakes and 1 oz. syrup
Rating: 4 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (6 pancakes + dipping syrup) 230 calories, 4.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 20 milligrams of cholesterol, 260 milligrams of sodium, 38 grams of total carbohydrates, 22 grams of total sugars, 10 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Creme Savers Hard Candy (2021)

Creme Savers  2021 Bags

What are Creme Savers?

Life Savers’ creamy hole-less cousins are back after a decade hiatus.

How are they?

Creme Savers were one of my grandmother’s favorite candies, so I’ve always had a special fondness for them. Throughout my childhood, she’d always have them in a bowl with Chocolate Riesen and packs of Pez sans dispensers for some reason.

I recall enjoying Creme Savers the most, so I was pretty excited when I heard they were coming back in orange and strawberry creme flavors.

Then I had them and realized some things are best left in the past.

Creme Savers  2021 Unwrapped

At the risk of lending credence to a stereotype… these are even more “grandma candy” than I remember.

I had an inkling what to expect because of the “creme” of it all, but they have that same mouth coating “warmness” to them that a Werther’s Original or butterscotch have. Does that make sense? I’m not asking for mint adjacent refreshment, but when I eat a hard candy, I at least want it to invigorate me a little. These things are dull – the candy equivalent of warm milk.

Well, to be fair, Orange is extremely dull. Strawberry is actually pretty solid overall.

I’m not sure how a citrus fruit managed to lay dormant, but the creme overpowers the orange to the point it tastes like the ghost of an orange swimming in some Greek yogurt. It’s cloying and will leave you grasping for a glass of water. I was expecting Creamsicle, but instead, I got cream-sick… Nah, I’m bailing on this dumb pun just like I bailed on this flavor. I’ll be giving the rest of the bag away.

Creme Savers  2021 Copy

Strawberry, on the other hand, is pleasant. It’s not great, but it’s easily the better of the two. The strawberry shines so much more than the orange, and since I can’t shake the overall “yogurt-ness” of these candies, it makes sense because strawberry is a far superior yogurt fruit. This is more along the lines of what I remembered. I’ll have no problem finishing the bag.

Anything else you need to know?

While I may not love these, they absolutely live up to their name. As I mentioned above, short of a Werther’s or butterscotch, these are probably the creamiest “sucking candy” I’ve ever had. It really lingers for way too long.

I can’t shake the fact that these taste like hardened discs of fruit-flavored yogurt, and that’s not really what I was hoping for.

Conclusion:

Creme Savers  2021 Wrapped

I guess my memory of Creme Savers faded over the years. I’m still happy to see them back, and I appreciate them if only for making me think of my grandmother’s weird candy dish.

I know these survived overseas while they were discontinued in the US, so maybe we’ll see some more flavors hit shelves in time. I’m always up for Banana Creme anything.

As far as I know, Creme Savers are currently only available at Big Lots, but they seem to be branching out to other retailers soon. Keep an eye on its Instagram account if you’re interested.

Purchased Price: $1.00 each
Size: 3 oz.
Purchased at: Big Lots
Rating: 3 out of 10 (Orange), 7 out of 10 (Strawberry)
Nutrition Facts: (3 Pieces) 60 calories, 1 gram of fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 30 milligrams of sodium, 11 grams of total carbohydrates, 9 grams of total sugars, 0 grams of protein.