McDonald’s Honey Mustard Snack Wrap

I wonder what’s a worse fate for a chicken: To be a grilled or crispy piece of chicken in the new McDonald’s Honey Mustard Snack Wrap.

Sure, there are even worse fates for chickens, like bird flu, being used in some screwed up way in a Jackass stunt, Chicken McNuggets, dancing naked in the Peter Gabriel “Sledgehammer” music video, or being eaten by Nicole Richie, then being regurgitated by Nicole Richie.

Unlike the original Ranch Snack Wrap, which only comes with crispy chicken, the honey mustard one come with either crispy chicken or grilled chicken, which is probably healthier than the crispy version, unless McDonald’s has found a way to grill things by sticking them in hot oil.

Along with your choice of chicken, the Honey Mustard Snack Wrap also comes with shredded cheddar jack cheese, lettuce, a sweet and tangy honey mustard sauce wrapped in a flour tortilla, and for some, it also comes with the guilt of knowing that you’re eating another McDonald’s product despite your promise to swear off of it after watching the documentary Super Size Me.

After trying both the crispy and grilled Honey Mustard Snack Wrap, it’s hard to determine which one I like better. It’s like trying to choose which Olsen twin I like best, because just like Mary-Kate and Ashley, both versions of the Honey Mustard Snack Wrap look alike, are kinda pale on the outside, and don’t have much meat in them.

The crispy version has 320 calories, 15 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 750 milligrams of sodium, 34 grams of carbs, 1 gram of dietary fiber, and 14 grams of protein.

The grilled version has 260 calories, 9 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 45 milligrams of cholesterol, 800 milligrams of sodium, 27 grams of carbs, 1 gram of dietary fiber, and 18 grams of protein.

Both versions are about six or seven inches long, which is either small, big, or just right, depending on how big your hands or cock is. For me, the size of the Honey Mustard Snack Wrap was wayyyyyyyy too small and I wished that it was a more reasonable nine to ten inches. But then again what do you expect for some thing that costs just $1.29?

So in the end, which Honey Mustard Snack Wrap do I prefer and which is the worst fate for a piece of chicken, crispy or grilled?

Well, the crispy version tastes better, but the grilled one is healthier. However, the honey mustard sauce had kind of a weird sweet deli mustard spicy taste to it, so it turns out that the worst fate for a piece of chicken would be to end up in a Honey Mustard Snack Wrap and I prefer neither the crispy nor grilled versions of it and I’d rather go buy the much better original Ranch Snack Wrap instead.

I’ll leave the Honey Mustard Snack Wraps for Nicole Richie to regurgitate.

(Editor’s Note: Thanks to Impulsive Buy reader Danton for letting me know about the McDonald’s Honey Mustard Snack Wrap.)

Item: McDonald’s Honey Mustard Snack Wrap
Price: $1.29
Purchased at: McDonald’s
Rating: 2 out of 5
Pros: Now able to choose between grilled and crispy chicken. Decent price. Grilled is healthier. Crispy is better tasting.
Cons: Honey mustard sauce is kind of weird tasting. Kind small for my big…um, hands. Breaking your promise to not eat fast food. Being in a Jackass stunt. Being regurgitated by Nicole Richie.

26 thoughts to “McDonald’s Honey Mustard Snack Wrap”

  1. Malt – No, it would be worse if they were in the CareerBuilder commercial.

    Dustin – I’m LOVE the hot mustard sauce for the Chicken McNuggets. I think that would’ve been a better sauce.

    Webmiztris – Yes, stay away from them, unless you’re Winnie the Pooh and absolutely must have something with honey.

    L’il E – Your weakness is kryptonite?

    Chuck – If I eat a salad I will probably get the Asian Salad, because I must continue to represent.

    LaR – Hilarious or sad, depending on the size of your hands or cock.

    Barb – Mmm…Big Mac. I know you want one! Ooooh, french fries! Mmm…They’re so tasty. Did my temptation work?

    Mad Cow – Yes, six or seven inch hands are pretty substantial for Asians.

    klew – Mmm…Malt vinegar on fish and chips.

    Brie – No, I believe the bastard child of condiments is Miracle Whip.

  2. Stacie – Remember that dude who eats nothing but Big Macs in the movie. At first, I thought that was kind of gross, but then I had a craving for a Big Mac.

    Ace N. – The “s” in Snacker stands for small.

    Domokun – Wait. She’s not dead. She sure looks dead. Isn’t she a zombie?

    luckinflux – Wow. You must have some really big hands!

    michelle – Yes, the sauce is what killed it for me. I’ve tasted some really good honey mustard sauces over the years, but the one in the Snack Wrap sucks hard.

    DJ At Work – Of course, rarely anything goes in her mouth.

    pego – I’m really waiting for healthy pizza from Pizza Hut.

    Angel H. – Nah, just say the whole thing sucked.

    GP – Hi GP in Montana! The question I want to ask you is: Can you make a Mickey D’s chocolate shake in your house? Also, you just me a craving for a McDonald’s chocolate shake.

    Sep – Good, because you shouldn’t love it.

  3. Obviously the worst fate for a chicken is to be in one of those corny budweiser superbowl ads.

    Or being set on fire, like in the upcoming Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie.

    So does the crispy chicken wrap taste more or less like a giant McNugget wrapped in a tortilla?

  4. Marvo – Well, I’m sure a few 6 or 7 inch (plus 9-10) things have gone in her mouth, but we don’t know that for sure since she hasn’t released any celeb-porn tapes like her disease-ridden friend Paris Hilton.

  5. L’il E – I believe that’s what Homer Simpson might say.

    Toni – Actually a giant McNugget wrapped in a tortilla with HOT MUSTARD sauce would totally ROCK!!! I love the hot mustard sauce.

    DJ At Work – I’m pretty sure also in every hole possible.

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