REVIEW: Peanut Butter Creme Oreo Cakesters

It doesn’t take much to make my nipples hard.

A light winter breeze, a cold shower or reading a Harry Potter book by candlelight in only my boxers all have the ability to areolas extendus. But nothing gets my nipples stiffer than the combination of chocolate and peanut butter.

It’s so bad that whenever I’m eating a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup, I make sure to fold my arms across my chest so that I don’t poke an eye out with my chesty protrusions. Because of my nipple’s love for chocolate and peanut butter, I was looking forward to enjoying the Peanut Butter Creme Oreo Cakesters.

If you’ve never had Cakesters before, it has a cream filling that’s inside two soft cake cookies that have a consistency that’s similar to the nipple (and artery) hardening Hostess Twinkies and Ho Ho. If you’ve never wrapped your lips around anything Hostess makes or Cakesters, congratulations, you will probably live a few years longer than those of us who have.

The Peanut Butter Creme version combines soft chocolatey cake on the outside with a peanut butter filling, which sounds really good and I was hoping it would be just as delicious as the regular Peanut Butter Creme Oreos. But sadly, after eating it, I feel they’re trying to hurt the sacred combination of chocolate and peanut butter in one cakey swoop. Instead of making my nipples erect, the Peanut Butter Creme Oreo Cakesters takes my nipples and gives them a purple nurple.

The chocolate cake cookies are just as soft as all the other flavors of Cakesters I’ve tried, but the flavor of the peanut butter creme is significantly muted and the only time I really taste it is in the aftertaste. This is disappointing because what makes my nipples turn into rockets when I eat a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup is the nutty flavor of the peanut butter which stands out more than the chocolate.

Unfortunately, the Peanut Butter Creme Oreo Cakesters accomplishes the opposite of that and makes my nipples sore with sadness.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 package (2 cakesters) – 210 calories, 9 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 4.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 270 milligrams of sodium, 120 milligrams of potassium, 31 grams of carbohydrates, 1 grams of fiber, 18 grams of sugar and 3 grams of protein.)

(Note: We also reviewed the original Oreo Cakesters (good) and the Nilla Cakesters (bad).)

Item: Peanut Butter Oreo Cakesters
Price: $3.49 (on sale)
Size: 6 pack
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 4 out of 10
Pros: Placing the word nipple in every paragraph in this review. Chocolate cake cookies were soft. Making my nipples hard. Contains polyunsaturated and monounsaturated fats. Twinkies and Ho Hos.
Cons: Weak peanut butter flavor. Contains high fructose corn syrup. One of the worst combinations that involves chocolate and peanut butter. Leaves my fingers slightly greasy. One Cakester is more than 100 calories. Getting a purple nurple.

20 thoughts to “REVIEW: Peanut Butter Creme Oreo Cakesters”

  1. First!

    I HATE Oreo Cakesters. Every variation I’ve ever had (just the original) has been horrible. Ugh.

    Also, lol at the word nipple. Glad I got to read it 10 times while learning about food. That’s why I love the impulsive buy.

  2. What are the odds. Brad and I @WRS wanted to pick a good food to review, and in a few hours this’ll be up on our page too.

    And no joke, we just wanted to get something worthy of possibly getting on The Week in Review. TIB is like the New York Times of food rating wisdom, and getting a mention on here is so damn awesome to us.

    Oh well, like they say, great minds think alike, and these things sure were appealing.

    I didn’t like ’em too much either, but Brad (who’s reviewing them) has a different opinion. It was really cool to read yours first though, usually never happens to me. You’re the king of reviews.

  3. That’s more nipples then a tour bus full of UCLA cheerleaders getting in a catfight with a pack of Hooters waitresses at Mardi Gras!

    I’ve never had these Cakesters but always wondered…Oreos are one of my favorite things…peanut butter is one of my favorite things….cake is one of my favorite things….I would hope these would be better…that is a waste of 100 calories….or 1000 if you end up eating 10 anyways.

  4. Heehee you said nipple!

    So far I have only really liked the regular cakesters, the vanilla and the double chocolate aren’t that great.
    mmmm reece peanut butter cups…

  5. foiled my review for today, sir! I’m not a nipple master, though, so it wouldn’t have compared. I liked ’em, though

  6. Oh, you and your nipples Marvo. One of my friends told me she can tell our reviews apart, because you talk about your nipples and well…I don’t.

  7. Have you ever rubbed chocolate and peanut butter on your nipples? Or other parts of your body? That would explain your fetish.

    On second thought I don’t want to know.

  8. This kind of product usually winds up making me very sad, I mean you’d think that with a classic combo like peanut butter and chocolate, it would be an instant classic, sadly I have tried the chocolate oreo cakesters and the experience left me quite cold, I woke up later that night with tears on my pillow and very confused about the direction my life was going in… For your own good don’t do cakesters.

    *Sad Panda*

  9. wow these do look good with a 1/2 gallon of ice cold 2 percent milk and by ice cold I mean 33 degrees
    I think i would like them


  10. “areolas extendus”– OMG! new favorite phrase!
    Thank you again Marvo for making me nearly inhale my beverage.

  11. I have to agree with you, Marvo. The peanut butter filling was weak, didn’t taste anything like peanut butter, really.

    I’ve tried all the Cakesters, I’d have to say my favorite was the Nilla one.

  12. Oreo Cakesters are a terrible attempt at making a commercialized version of a Whoopie Pie.

  13. I agree these are very disappointing. BUT, what I did was take the top of the Cakester off, spread some actual peanut butter over the existing filling, and replace the top. This made the Cakester go from “meh” to delicious.

  14. But how are they taxed?!

    (A few years back, a UK biscuit manufacturer went to the high court to force the Revenue to consider one of its biscuits a cake for tax purposes. They succeeded. That’s why Britain now has a legal definition of ‘cake’. Really.)

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