Before this assignment, I didn’t actually know that Chobani did more than yogurt. But then I Googled and it turns out that it’s got its hands in a bit of everything. (Okay, well everything dairy-based except ice cream. And cheese. And cottage cheese. Fine, I guess by “everything,” I mean all manner of yogurts, and coffee creamer, and now this. And something called “Chobani Coconut” which is billed as a non-dairy treat. Oh, and oat milk. So… some things that are also non-dairy based.)
Anyway, it’s 2021 and cold brew coffee is still all the rage (I think?) so Chobani figured, why not?
I’m a cold brew novice. It’s not that I’m anti-cold brew, I’ve just always chosen hot coffee. Especially now because it’s winter, and we’ve had multiple days this week where the high was in the single digits; iced anything is a hard sell.
But you know what’s worth the mild discomfort and probably turning the thermostat up a degree? This product.
Chobani introduced four varieties, but I was unable to procure “Pure Black.” So for the sake of this review, we’ll look at the remaining three.
So, I just got through talking about how I love this product, and now I’m going to tell you that I don’t care for this particular version. But, I’m gonna blame the oat milk. See, I don’t even know that I’ve had oat milk prior to this. But something about this just wasn’t doing it for me. The beginning of the drink is decent, but the back end hits you with a sensation that makes me think of slightly tangy chalk. It’s not repulsive, it’s just… unwelcome.
Simply put, this is heavenly. The vanilla is strong, muting the medium roast a tad. The rich coffee undertones are still there, but it’s a little like you maybe accidentally spilled a bit of your vanilla shake into a cup of Joe. (And no, I’m not sure how that might happen either, but play along.) From start to finish, it’s creamy and indulgent, which makes this the first time I’ve described something as such and meant it.
Remember everything I said about the Vanilla Creamer? This is that, only without the vanilla. The coffee flavoring is a bit more noticeable, but not aggressively so. Each drink manages to stay rich while remaining light and silky. While the vanilla one brought forth visions of spilled vanilla milkshakes cascading into coffee cups, this is a little like someone dumping chocolate milk into your coffee. It is, in a word, scrumtrulescent.
The two prohibitive things I could say about Chobani’s foray into cold brew coffee is that it’s not nutritionally great, and I could use a little more caffeine (it has 85 milligrams per serving). While I applaud the simplicity of the ingredients, 170 calories and 22 grams of sugar per 12 ounce serving keep this from being a daily indulgence for me. But is it worth it for a weekend treat? Absolutely.
Purchased Price: $2.99 (on sale)
Size: 32 fl oz.
Purchased at: Hy-Vee
Rating: 9 out of 10 (Sweet Creamer), 9 out of 10 (Vanilla Creamer), 6 out of 10 (Oat Milk)
Nutrition Facts: (12 oz.) Sweet Creamer & Vanilla Creamer – 170 calories, 5 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 110 milligrams of sodium, 24 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 22 grams of sugar (including 15 grams of added sugar), and 5 grams of protein. Oat Milk – 110 calories, 6 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 180 milligrams of sodium, 11 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 7 grams of sugar (including 7 grams of added sugar), and 2 grams of protein.