Category: Reviews

REVIEW: Blue Bell Peachy Peach Ice Cream

Denis 12 Comments

Blue Bell Peachy Peach Ice Cream Pint

What is Blue Bell Peachy Peach Ice Cream?

It’s not the most creatively named ice cream, but it certainly has an accurate moniker. This newest flavor from Texas-based Blue Bell is described as “creamy peach ice cream with chunks of sweetened peaches.”

How is it?

Blue Bell Peachy Peach Ice Cream Top

Well, it’s peachy, as advertised, both literally and figuratively. There are no bells and whistles with this ice cream — those wouldn’t taste very good anyway — but it delivers on its promise. It’s a tasty peach ice cream base, and the peach chunks give it a pleasant boost and some extra texture. I generally find Blue Bell ice creams to be creamier than the average store brand. However, this one seemed to be a bit lacking in the creaminess department. Even so, that’s about the only mark I have against this. The ice cream flavor is pleasant with the perfect amount of peachiness while not being overpowering.

Blue Bell Peachy Peach Ice Cream Piece

The peach chunks, which are quite large, dial up the peach flavor and the sweetness a few notches, but again, not to the extreme. I wouldn’t say you get a fresh peach flavor from the chunks but rather more of a candied peach taste. It’s hard for a somewhat basic ice cream product to be spectacular, and this one isn’t, but I did like it better than the average single-flavor ice cream.

Anything else you need to know?

You don’t need to know this in any way whatsoever, but apparently, the world record for the largest peach is 1 pound 12 ounces, and not surprisingly, it was grown in Georgia. I have to say I’m not that impressed. I don’t know what weight would sufficiently impress me — maybe if it was as big as my head — but I thought the record peach would be bigger for some reason. See, you didn’t need to know any of this, but since it’s a section of the review, I feel compelled to fill this space.

Conclusion:

Blue Bell Peachy Peach Ice Cream Spoon

For a straightforward ice cream flavor like this, your level of enjoyment will be closely tied to your affinity for peaches. For me, peaches land about in the middle of the fruit spectrum. So I’ll happily finish this pint but probably won’t buy another one. If you are a peach fanatic, this might turn into one of your favorite ice creams.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: One Pint
Purchased at: H-E-B
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2/3 cup) 210 calories, 9 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 55 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 26 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Burger King Whopper Melt

Vin 14 Comments

Burger King Whopper Melt Toast

Before I stepped foot in the hallowed Home of the Whopper to try its new Melt, I took a quiz on the Burger King app to figure out which version was perfect for me.

Said app proceeded to tell me to get the regular Whopper Melt because I was “the anti-social one.”

Burger King Whopper Melt Anti Social

Sure, I haven’t interacted with another human being since 2019, but I don’t need a burger joint to remind me. Here I thought I was a glutton for fast food, but turns out I was also a glutton for punishment.

Nevertheless, I was undeterred. I didn’t exactly appreciate that little jab, but I wanted to try the burger. You win, King.

The new Whopper Melt is a double patty burger smothered in melty cheese, “Stacker Sauce,” and caramelized onions layered between two pieces of toast.

I wouldn’t say mine was particularly “toasty,” but I love this style bun, and it was easily better than the BK norm.

Burger King Whopper Melt Under the Bun

For a burger called a “melt,” I was genuinely happy the cheese wasn’t as “melty” as I expected. I thought this thing would be extremely messy, but the cheese rested nicely between regular slice and nacho sauce, giving it a texture that fit the name, but also didn’t drip all over the place. It was perfect.

Speaking of perfect, Stacker Sauce was the star of the show. I know it’s been used in the past, but this was my first time trying it.

The caramelized onions sprinkled throughout the sauce gave it the flavor and texture of diced sweet pickle relish in a Thousand Island dressing. I think I may have found my new favorite burger sauce.

Burger King Whopper Melt Bite

As for the beef, they’re not my favorite fast food patties, but they do the job. It’ll all depend on whether or not you like flame-broiled patties. I couldn’t help but wish this was a Wendy’s burger, as the entire concept and appearance felt more like its speed.

The Whopper Melt is basically a Whopper in name only. I hadn’t had a Whopper in years, but I know this was unequivocally better.

You can get your Whopper Melt with bacon, but it doesn’t seem necessary. There’s also a spicy version with jalapenos and a “creamy spicy sauce,” which I’m sure is good, but I loved the Stacker Sauce so much, I can’t imagine it possibly topping it.

Burger King Whopper Melt Wrapper

If I have one minor complaint, this sandwich is somehow pretty… small?

I expected a behemoth, but was done with it in no time. There are two patties weighing 1/4 of a pound, but I don’t even think this stacks up to a regular Whopper in size. It’s like a double Whopper Jr., but ya know what, I didn’t get fast food fatigue, so that’s a plus.

The Whopper Melt might legit be the best BK burger I’ve had since, I don’t even know, the original Rodeo Burger from the 90s? It’s impressive.

My new plan is to get some actual friends together and try the Spicy Whopper Melt, which I assume is only for cool kids.

Purchased Price: $5.79
Size: N/A
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 604 calories, 35 grams of fat, 15 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 93 milligrams of cholesterol, 981 milligrams of sodium, 42 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 29 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Doritos Roulette Cool Ranch

Brandon 4 Comments

Doritos Roulette Cool Ranch Bag

I’m not much of a gambler. I’ve been to Las Vegas once, a couple of years ago on a work trip, and I played (and lost) $5 in the hotel casino slot machine just so I could say I did it. It’s not that I don’t like risk; I will skydive or play basketball with brittle 40-year-old man knees or scream obscenities at a bull in Pamplona any day of the week. What I don’t like about gambling is the part where I am forced to part with money (mostly) due to things outside of my control.

But what about gambling with food? I do plenty of that, actually. I’ll eat pizza that was accidentally left out on the counter all night and slather my sandwiches with mayonnaise well north of its expiration date. As a young man brimming with virulent stupidity, I once ate a chicken tender from a trashcan on Bourbon Street. So is an extremely hot Cool Ranch Doritos any worse? (Well, okay— it’s undoubtedly safer than Trashcan Chicken, that’s for sure.) Let’s discuss.

The original Doritos Roulette chip — of the nacho cheese ilk — debuted in the US in 2015. (It’d been available abroad the year prior.) To the delight of spicy snack fans, they resurfaced last year in their original nacho incantation. But with the recent advent of Flamin’ Hot Cool Ranch Doritos, it seemed fated that Frito-Lay would eventually try its hand at Cool Ranch Roulette. So is it worth the gamble?

If you like Cool Ranch Doritos and don’t mind hot, you’ll like these chips. But how hot do they get, you’re wondering? Pretty hot. Like, really pretty hot, but not, “My nose and eyes are leaking, and I’m rethinking some of my life’s decisions, and why did I put off meeting with that guy about the living will. He said that the consultation was free unless they actually drafted paperwork” hot. Fresh jalapeño hot, but not 7 Pot Douglah hot. (It’s a pepper, look it up.) The heat is intense and lingering, and it is almost immediate.

Doritos Roulette Cool Ranch Closeup

The first chip I had was a regular Cool Ranch, and as I reached for a second, I wondered, how many hot chips are there in this bag? Is it like, 1 out of 10? 1 out of — and then as soon as I bit the second chip, my lips were burning, followed almost immediately by my tongue. Alarming as this was, it didn’t hold up statistically. I ate five or six chips before I got another hot one. (You know, just enough time for your mouth to begin feeling sort of okay again.) And really, that seemed to be about the ratio -— one out of every six or seven chips was burny.

It’s also worth noting that just because you liked the Flamin’ Hot Cool Ranch Doritos, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll like these. The FHCRD are a bit tangier and have more of a hot sauce burn, if you will, while this is much more of a pepper-based heat. Another reason that I enjoyed these more? If you have a kid who can’t yet read, it makes for a cheap laugh. (And it may also deter them from stealing your precious snacks.)

Purchased Price: $3.00
Size: 9.75 oz bag
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (12 chips) 150 calories, 8 grams of fat, 1 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 190 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of dietary fiber, less than 1 gram of sugar, 0 grams of added sugars, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Simple 7UP

Alex 34 Comments

Simple 7Up Box

What is Simple 7UP?

7UP has employed the KISS principle (“Keep It Simple, Stupid”) and brought us all a pared down version of its lemon-lime soft drink. Simple 7UP is as uncomplicated as possible with only six real ingredients: filtered carbonated water, sugar, citric acid, lemon extract, lime extract, and stevia leaf extract.

How is it?

Simple 7Up Top

I was optimistic about this soda as I smelled it in the can since it had a much more distinct lemon and lime scent than I’m used to from 7UP. When I took a sip, it initially excited me with its exceptionally light and crisp flavor, reminding me of a sparkling citrus juice beverage. Unlike regular 7UP, which encases blended lemon-lime flavor in a rounded syrupiness, Simple 7UP had noticeably separate flavors of lemon and lime that were lightly sweetened and incredibly fresh in the carbonated water. And despite using extracts instead of juice, the taste of each managed to shine without being too strong.

Simple 7Up Glass

But then the stevia had to go and complicate things. The sip that started off so strong quickly turned bitter yet off-puttingly sweet, then had the audacity to finish on that terrible note. And so it went for each sip until I’d had enough about half of a can in.

The highs were so high and the lows were so low, I’m honestly not sure how I feel about this soda.

Anything else you need to know?

It seems like 7UP isn’t sure how they feel about it either, since there’s barely any mention of the beverage from the brand online; it’s conspicuously absent from the product section of its website. I found one article saying Simple 7UP was being test-marketed about a year ago, but couldn’t find any information about this rollout.

Additionally, I was surprised to learn the original 7UP also only contains six ingredients. So, keep in mind the simplicity here lies in the “real”ness of the ingredients themselves, not their quantity.

Conclusion:

Simple 7Up Can

Simply said, I’m torn. I loved how five of the six ingredients worked together, but the inclusion of stevia caused each sip to end on a flavor repellent enough for me to decide to not purchase again. Anyone who’s ever seen how much sugar is in a lemonade recipe can understand the hesitation to make sugar the only sweetener in a citrus soda, but it’s hard to not imagine how spectacular Simple 7UP could have tasted if they had kept it even simpler.

Purchased Price: $6.49
Size: 12 pack (12 oz cans)
Purchased at: Ralphs
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 can) 110 calories, 0 grams of fat, 40 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of total carbohydrates, 28 grams of total sugars, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough Mixes (S’mores and Peanut Butter)

Marvo 1 Comment

Ben Jerry s Cookie Dough Mixes Pouches

What are Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough Mixes?

They combine edible cookie dough bites with another mix-in you might see in a Ben & Jerry’s ice cream pint. At this time, there are two varieties you can find in the freezer aisle —- S’mores and Peanut Butter. The former features graham cracker cookie dough with marshmallow truffles, while the latter has peanut butter chocolate chip cookie dough and mini peanut butter cups.

How are they?

Maybe it’s just me, but the dough pieces taste noticeably blander than previous cookie dough chunks I’ve had from Ben & Jerry’s. So much so that if I looked into these pouches and saw there were only dough pieces left, I might not want to finish them. Although maybe I feel that way because there’s a stark flavor contrast between the cookie dough and the candy pieces.

Ben Jerry s Cookie Dough Mixes Peanut Butter

The graham cracker cookie dough pieces are confusing because I’m not sure anyone would identify them as graham cracker anything. They taste more vanilla-ish and have a slight butteriness. While that makes sense in cookie dough, that doesn’t help me think of graham crackers. As for the peanut butter chocolate chip cookie dough chunks, the chips buried in them don’t have much chocolatey flavor and whatever nuttiness they have is mild.

Ben Jerry s Cookie Dough Mixes S mores

The much sweeter candy pieces provide the flavor boosts that make these a worthwhile purchase, and thankfully the candy mix-in to cookie dough ratio appears to be almost 1 to 1. The mini peanut butter cups taste exactly like what you’d find in pints. They have a strong chocolatey and peanut butter taste that dwarfs the dough chunks’ flavor. As for the marshmallow truffles, they were as delightful as the peanut butter cups, maybe even better. They have the perfect balance of chocolate and marshmallow flavor, and the latter helps intensify the vanilla in the dough. Now, if only those chunks had some graham flavor.

Anything else you need to know?

I’m not going to take credit for the Cookie Dough Mixes idea, but a year ago, well before they debuted, in a review of Ben & Jerry’s The Tonight Dough Chunks, I wrote, “Ben & Jerry’s should sell bags of its edible cookie dough with its non-dough mix-ins. It could be called Mix-In Mashups (feel free to use that, Flavor Gurus).”

Also, it seems as if the marshmallow truffles haven’t been in any other Ben & Jerry’s products. Feel free correct me, internet.

Conclusion:

Despite the somewhat bland cookie dough chunks, I enjoyed popping Cookie Dough Mixes into my mouth. Well, um, after making sure there was at least one candy piece before doing so.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free product samples from Ben & Jerry’s. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 8 oz pouches
Purchased at: Received from Ben & Jerry’s
Rating: 7 out of 10 (both)
Nutrition Facts: (2 Tbsp./28 grams) S’mores 130 calories, 7 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 20 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 14 grams of sugar (13 grams of added sugar), and less than 1 gram of protein. Peanut Butter – 130 calories, 7 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 45 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 10 grams of sugar (9 grams of added sugar), and 2 grams of protein.