Category: Reviews

REVIEW: Cinnamon Toast Crunch Creamy Cinnamon Spread

Marvo 5 Comments

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Creamy Cinnamon Spread Jar

According to the Cinnamon Toast Crunch Creamy Cinnamon Spread’s jar, it’s a product of Greece. But after touching the jar, pulling back the foil lid, and trying to keep the tan condiment on a butter knife, I began to wonder if it’s also a product of grease.

Before getting a chance to sample the spread, my first experience with the CTC spread was wondering why my fingers felt as if I’d just eaten pizza after touching the unopened glass jar. After inspecting the screw-on plastic lid and foil safety seal, it appears there wasn’t any leakage. But when I tried to remove the foil seal, only the golden top layer peeled away, leaving behind a fragile paper layer that broke into pieces as I attempted to remove it. I suspect this happened because the sample I received from B&G Foods was transported on its side, and the oils in the spread partially penetrated the foil seal.

As for the spread itself, it’s goopy, has an aroma that makes me wonder if I should stick a wick in it, and comes in a color that a paint brand might call “Camel Hump Tan.” Well, I’m used to goopy because the Smuckers Natural Peanut Butter I use slides off the knife as easily as this CTC spread does. Its ingredients include canola and palm oils, which might explain this cinnamon condiment’s viscosity and oiliness.

While it’s goopy and smells a little off, its flavor is surprisingly delicious. Along with being a product of Greece, the jar also says it “delivers the epic taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch with notes of brown sugar and graham flavor.” However, it doesn’t have me thinking this is a Cinnamon Toast Crunch-flavored slurry. But it does taste like something as tasty as the cereal — cinnamon rolls. Well, more specifically, the sweet stuff within the cinnamon rolls’ rolls. You know, the best part. There’s also a noticeable brown sugar flavor (which makes sense since it’s the spread’s first ingredient), but I didn’t get any graham notes.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Creamy Cinnamon Spread Toast

I spread it on bread, dipped pears into it, and swirled it in my overnight oats. With every application, I got a bold and wonderful cinnamon roll-like flavor. If I had the inclination and ability to bake up a batch of cinnamon rolls, I’d use this instead of the standard icing. Overall, its taste makes up for it being as slippery as a greasy pig.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free product sample from B&G Foods. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 10 oz jar
Purchased at: Received from B&G Foods
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 tbsp/30 grams) 160 calories, 9 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 75 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, 18 grams of sugar (16 grams of added sugar), and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Papa John’s Epic Pepperoni-Stuffed Crust Pizza

Jenna 16 Comments

Papa John s Epic Pepperoni Stuffed Crust Pizza Whole

I imagine that Papa John’s Epic Pepperoni-Stuffed Crust Pizza might have made Little Caesars — who released a similar product not quite a year ago — cry, “Et tu, Papa?” But I won’t subtract points for lack of originality. This combo feels quintessential; pepperoni and stuffed crust go together like pepperoni and pizza!

Before we get into the real meat of this review (ha, ha), I should point out that this crust is not just stuffed, but per Papa John’s website, also “seasoned.” This was a relief to read, as at first glance, the generous smattering of unexpected black flecks had me sort of concerned. The seasoning was zesty — hard to pinpoint one taste exactly, but it was simultaneously garlicky, salty, and a bit cheesy — and while I think the stuffed crust could have stood on its own, the addition wasn’t unwelcome.

Papa John s Epic Pepperoni Stuffed Crust Pizza Slice Side

Biting into the puffy, pillowy crust, I was pleased to notice that the taste of the pepperoni came through nicely but didn’t entirely steal the cheese’s thunder. It felt like a lovely complement, both in terms of the salty, meaty flavor popping against the mellower, creamy taste of the cheese, and the pop of slim, crisp texture contrasting the cheese’s silky thickness. But, while tasting this marriage of cheese and pepperoni satisfied my appetite, it couldn’t satisfy my curiosity; to do that, I had to peel back the crusty curtain.

Tearing open and rolling back the crust to reveal the cheesy, pepperoni-y secrets folded within had two effects. The first is that dissecting my pizza so thoughtfully made me feel kind of like a serial killer, or at least a very obscure sort of surgeon. The second, more pertinent point is that I could see exactly how many pieces of pepperoni went into the crust on each slice: two to three.

Papa John s Epic Pepperoni Stuffed Crust Pizza Slice Top

Honestly, that doesn’t exactly sound substantial enough to base a whole product around. Imagine how disappointed you would be if you ordered a pepperoni pizza and only got two to three pieces on each slice as a topping! You could argue that a little of this particular food item goes a long way, but I’m not sure the kind of person who orders their disc of meat and cheese with extra meat and cheese crammed inside is the kind of person who worries about oversaturation. It seems that at least three more pepperoni pieces could have been curled around the cheese stuffing without overlapping, and if you’re going to release something as all-out as pepperoni stuffed crust in the first place, why not fill every last gap you can?

Papa John s Epic Pepperoni Stuffed Crust Pizza Innards

Though maybe I’m just jealous because the site mentions that the pizza is “topped off with more pepperoni,” but mine didn’t come with any outside of what was in the crust. Maybe that’s on me for missing some step in online ordering, but I assumed a pizza with pepperoni in the name would include it as a topping by default!

I must disclose that I’m a stuffed crust fanatic, which might suggest that my bar for this offering would be quite high. But ultimately, I think it just means that I’m more willing to accept it for giving me the luscious cheese filling I crave even though its pepperoni potential underwhelms.

Purchased Price: $13.99
Size: Large
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Information not available on website.

REVIEW: Eggo Thick & Fluffy Tiramisu and Strawberry Cheesecake Waffles

Brandon 12 Comments

Eggo Thick Fluffy Tiramisu and Strawberry Cheesecake Waffles Boxes

Here’s the thing about me and waffles: I don’t know when to eat them. I love them, right? Pancakes, French toast, and cinnamon rolls, too. But the thing is, I’m a salty and savory breakfast guy, though and through. Give me a big ol’ sloppy plate piled with biscuits smothered in thick, creamy gravy, a mountain of buttery scrambled eggs, and one pig’s worth of sausage and bacon, please.

So then, what do I do? When do I eat sweet breakfast foodstuffs? To be frank, it all feels so dessert-y to me. (I mean, one of the aforementioned foods has cake right in the name.) But here’s the deal with that — how often do you feel like eating a big syrupy stack of flapjacks or a fluffy golden waffle after pounding a plate of fried chicken and mashed potatoes?

It’s tricky.

But Eggo seems to be embracing the “breakfast for dessert” ideation with the introduction of its new Thick & Fluffy family members, Tiramisu and Strawberry Cheesecake. Will these vanguard vittles make me feel less conflicted about my B4D dilemma?

Well, they would if they were good, which they’re not, so they won’t.

Where do they go wrong, you’re asking? Let’s take a deeper dive.

Eggo Thick Fluffy Tiramisu and Strawberry Cheesecake Waffles Frozen

First of all, these things don’t cook properly. At least, not in a toaster — aka, the place where you generally cook Eggo waffles. Much like the problematic Pillsbury Toaster Strudel, the Thick & Fluffy waffle cooks unevenly, leaving pockets of cold tundra surrounded by peninsulas of heat. The directions suggest toasting it on the lowest setting (!) And that “two cookings may be required.” I’m sorry… no? The point of a frozen waffle — or strudel, or Pop Tart — is that I can be ready to rock with that thing with very little foreplay. (I mean, in theory, anyway.) Same goes for the second suggested cooking method, a conventional oven. What is this, Kellogg’s, the slow food movement?

But anyway, all of this cooking nonsense would be forgivable if the waffles came out enjoyable. And they just don’t.

Eggo Thick Fluffy Strawberry Cheesecake Waffles Warmed

I tried each kind plain, straight from the toaster, and then covered in butter and syrup. The Strawberry Cheesecake had a decent artificial strawberry flavoring (owing to the inclusion of dried strawberries, no doubt), but there was nothing there that even began to suggest “cheesecake.” Despite its flaws — the batter was bland, it could’ve used considerably more strawberries, and I was promised cheesecake, dammit — it did hold up better to butter and syrup than the tiramisu.

Eggo Thick Fluffy Tiramisu Waffles Warmed

The tiramisu was definitely better, though, don’t get me wrong. The box promised “cocoa and roasted coffee” flavoring, and it had that. The coffee flavor was subtle and accompanied by the tiniest hint of chocolate. Straight from the toaster, they were okay. But something peculiar happened when adorned with butter and syrup, though. They turned into totally plain tasting Eggo waffles. The mild coffee tones were made obsolete.

As a fan of eating breakfast for dessert, I was excited about these waffles conceptually. As someone who doesn’t like to eat bad things, though, I ended up disappointed.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 11.6 oz boxes/6 waffles
Purchased at: Hy-Vee
Rating: 5 out of 10 (Tiramisu), 4 out of 10 (Strawberry Cheesecake)
Nutrition Facts: (1 waffle) Tiramisu – 160 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 260 milligrams of sodium, 24 grams of carbohydrates, 7 grams of sugar (including 7 grams added sugars), and 3 grams of protein. Strawberry Cheesecake – 160 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 240 milligrams of sodium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, 9 grams of sugar (including 9 grams added sugars), and 3 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Red Bull Summer Edition Strawberry Apricot Energy Drink

Vin 5 Comments

Red Bull Summer Edition Strawberry Apricot Energy Drink Can

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, it ain’t summer until Red Bull says it’s summer.

Well, folks, I’m thrilled to tell you that Red Bull says it’s summer.

Play that theme music!

(NOTE: That theme music is “Rebel Rebel” by David Bowie, but instead of “Rebel,” it’s “Red Bull,” and it’s just that line, over and over, for four minutes. I won’t lie, it gets old pretty quickly.)

I’ll tell you what doesn’t get old pretty quickly, the flavor of this year’s Red Bull Summer Edition – Strawberry Apricot.

This has gotta be one of the more exciting energy drink flavor profiles I’ve seen in a while, and that’s because apricot is a criminally underutilized fruit.

I wracked my brain and couldn’t think of a single drink featuring apricot. I guess Red Bull has gotten so far down the fruit list that it decided to finally dip its toe in uncharted waters, although I do think they wussed out a bit by cutting apricot with the way more familiar strawberry.

Red Bull Summer Edition Strawberry Apricot Energy Drink Top

Upon cracking the can, the scent of sour strawberry candy smacked me in the face. That was kinda what I feared would happen. I had very little faith that the apricot would rise above or even run parallel to the strawberry.

Well, unfortunately (but not really…), I was right, and the strawberry flavor popped right out of the gate. That’s not to say I didn’t get a hint of apricot.

The fruit has a distinctive aftertaste to it. When they’re ripe, they start sweet and finish with a little sour kick. That was pretty much what happened with this drink.

I think apricot pushed through in another way because I don’t know how to describe this flavor as anything other than “soft.” Perhaps I’m being influenced by the texture of the fruit itself, but this was one of the more delicate Red Bull varieties I can ever remember drinking, and I think I’m gonna give credit to the apricot there. It wasn’t harsh at all, and that supporting flavor did its best to mute the more dominant strawberry in a way I found super light and refreshing.

Actually, I’ll tell you what this ultimately reminded me of – Strawberry Fruit Roll-ups.

After a little while, that’s all I could think of, but it wasn’t just Strawberry Fruit Roll-up, it was also apricot fruit leather. I guess that makes sense because when I think of the more “upscale” fruit leathers, three flavors come to mind – strawberry, raspberry, and apricot. I always enjoyed those as a kid, and I rode a little nostalgia wave with each additional sip.

Red Bull Summer Edition Strawberry Apricot Energy Drink Glass

As for the “energy” aspect, this could’ve just hit me on the right day at the right time because man, it gave me a serious energy boost. That rarely happens anymore, so I considered it a huge bonus. I feel like the electric orange can also had a hand in hyping me up.

Overall, I think most loyal Red Bull drinkers will dig this year’s summer edition, even you weirdos who call apricots, “Ape-ricots.” There’s a lot to like here.

Ok, the review’s over. You can go ahead and kill the theme music now.

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 12 fl oz can
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 160 calories, 0 grams of fat, 125 milligrams of sodium, 40 grams of total carbohydrates, 38 grams of total sugars, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: ICEE Cherry and Blue Raspberry Creme Filled Cookies

Dustin 1 Comment

ICEE Cookies Cherry Package

ICEE has launched a new line of sandwich cookies that are meant to evoke the flavors of its iconic frozen drinks. The press release states that “fans can enjoy the classic pop and fizz of their favorite carbonated beverage in a delicious crème filled cookie.” This intriguing concept seems to indicate that the crème contains pieces of popping candy. The cookies feature cherry or blue raspberry crème sandwiched between vanilla wafers.

I decided to try the cherry flavor first, as that would be the most familiar to me. In my youth, I always drank the cherry or cola-flavored ICEEs. I opened the package and my sense of smell was walloped by an intense artificial cherry aroma. It was shockingly potent.

ICEE Cookies Cherry Creme

I pulled a cookie out and twisted it apart, exposing the fluorescent crème. I jumped right in and pulled the crème off with my tongue. The flavor immediately reminded me of an actual cherry ICEE. It was saccharine, but not overbearing. It was an artificial cherry flavoring, but never veered into cough syrup territory. There were tiny crunchy bits integrated throughout the crème. I could feel a very mild sensation of effervescence, but it was much more understated than expected. It wasn’t exactly “fizzy.”

ICEE Cookies Logo

The cookies themselves had a faint vanilla flavor, but not nearly enough to be considered a “vanilla wafer.” They tasted closer to a nondescript shortbread, but it doesn’t particularly matter since they exist solely as a vessel for the crème. The cookie allowed the crème to take center stage.

ICEE Cookies Blue Raspberry Package

I then opened the blue raspberry package and was greeted with a softer yet still immediately familiar aroma. I employed the same approach and tried the crème on its own first. It was a standard blue raspberry flavor, but was noticeably sweeter, stronger, and more artificial tasting than the cherry. I’m not sure if I’ve ever had a blue raspberry ICEE, so I can’t speak to its accuracy. Oddly, the blue raspberry cookies seemed to have more popping candy in the crème, which helped to make them feel slightly fizzier. When eating a whole cookie, it felt like a somewhat disjointed experience. The crème filling was just too domineering.

ICEE Cookies Blue Raspberry Creme

For me, the cherry-flavored ICEE cookies feel like a more cohesive presentation. The vanilla-esque wafers work better with the cherry-flavored crème. I will be the first to admit that my judgment could be clouded by nostalgia, though. Had I consumed blue raspberry ICEEs by the bucketload as a child, perhaps I’d have a different opinion.

ICEE Cookies Bear

The ICEE cookies are a unique idea with an underwhelming execution. If the crème filling had more (or more effective) popping candy, these would be even better. An improved wafer would also elevate the experience. If you’re a big ICEE fan, then these may be worth your time for flavor alone. I would steer clear, though, if the only appeal is the popping candy in the crème.

Purchased Price: $3.28 each
Size: 13 oz. package
Purchased at: Fry’s
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Cherry), 6 out of 10 (Blue Raspberry)
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) 140 calories, 6 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.