REVIEW: Mr. Coffee Cafe Frappe

/ / Reviews / 11 Comments

Mr. Coffee Cafe Frappe

It seems like the holiday season came and went faster than an unsuspecting family who hoped to pick up a pet rabbit at the infamous Nevada establishment known as the Moonlite BunnyRanch. After trying to find a proper place to dispose of your Christmas tree or Hanukkah bush, it’s time to go through your loot and decide what you’re going to keep, what you’re going to regift and what is heading back to store.

When I received the Mr. Coffee Cafe Frappe, I was happy. However, I wasn’t as excited as I was Christmas 1993 when I received an amazing 16-bit gaming console known as the Sega Genesis. But needless to say, over the years I’ve become jaded, bitter and a crotchety woman. That is, of course, if I don’t have my coffee. Once I have at least one cup in my system I’m ready for the day.

The Mr. Coffee Cafe Frappe seemed like it was the perfect countertop machine for me because I love the icy treats from Starbucks and Dunkin’ Donuts, but I’m cheaper than an elderly man who insists on getting senior citizen discounts at the Moonlite BunnyRanch. In fact, I’m so cheap that when I found out Dunkin’ Donuts gives senior discounts, I was tempted to buy a Wilfred Brimley mask and go to the nearest location so that I could get my coffee fix for 50 cents cheaper. But I didn’t because I’m too cheap to buy the mask.

The Cafe Frappe is pretty easy to operate; after the coffee brews, you add two cups of ice, milk and whatever else your caffeine-powered heart desires. The pitcher makes one large serving or two smaller servings, but that is if the unit works. After making my first frappe (a coffee and mint concoction with chocolate soy milk) and cleaning the pitcher, the machine would not turn on again.

Nothing that a trip to Bed Bath & Beyond couldn’t fix, right?

Wrong.

Apparently this smoothie coffee maker hybrid was the hot item this year for people who buy random kitchen appliances and use them once. So a gift turned into a hunt to find a Mr. Coffee Cafe Frappe within a 50-mile radius. After finally finding one, I was able to make unique and sinful frappes like The Lady Godiva, which is tiramisu flavored coffee and a few shots of Godiva chocolate liqueur. The Cafe Frappe is a great machine to impress party guests, but it would take a lot of time to make enough for a group of people, like all of the women one can choose from at the Moonlite BunnyRanch.

Just like that Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine I had when I was just a wee little girl, I’m sure the novelty of the Mr. Coffee Cafe Frappe will wear off and become the coffee lover’s version of the Margaritaville Margarita Maker, Power Juicer and every As Seen on TV appliance.

Item: Mr. Coffee Cafe Frappe
Price: Received as gift but retails for $79.95
Purchased at: Bed Bath & Beyond
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Easy to set up. Easy to make. Coming up with your own recipes that Starbucks or Dunkin’ Donuts can’t make due to legal reasons. Wilfred Brimley Masks. Sega Genesis.
Cons: Quality of the machine isn’t the best. Doesn’t make a large quantity of frozen delicious beverages. No College Student Discount at Starbucks or Dunkin’ Donuts. Driving around to return gifts.

PRIZE DRAWING: Because None of My Carl’s Jr.’s Are A Participating Restaurant

/ / Announcement, Prize Drawing / 35 Comments

I have a coupon for a free Carl’s Jr. Grilled Chicken Salad, which I received from the fine folks at Carl’s Jr.

I was going to use this coupon to purchase one of the new three salads in order to review it, but none of the Carl’s Jr. restaurants in my area offers them. Now I could give this coupon to a homeless guy as a cruel joke, since he also can’t use it, but my karma is at an all-time low and I need to improve it, so when I’m reincarnated I don’t come back as a cockroach or an even lower life form — a cast member on MTV’s Jersey Shore.

So to help with my karma, I decided to give away this coupon to a lucky Impulsive Buy reader who lives near a Carl’s Jr. If you don’t know if a Carl’s Jr. is nearby, visit their website. But also make sure they offer the salads. This coupon can’t be used at a Hardee’s.

To enter this prize drawing, leave a comment with THIS post. Say whatever you like.

Please don’t forget to fill out the email field because I’ll be emailing the winner for their mailing address. The Impulsive Buy will stop accepting entries on Sunday, January 17, 2010 11:59 p.m. Hawaii Standard Time. Only one entry allowed per person and it’s only open to those 18 years old or older, who, again, live near a Carl’s Jr.

Good luck!

Fine Print: The Impulsive Buy promises your email address will not be used to send you stupid press releases that you don’t even care about. Not even a little. The Impulsive Buy also promises your mailing address will not be used to send you my credit card bills. Bribes will not be accepted. The Impulsive Buy will not be responsible for lost mail, damaged mail, or not have a participating Carl’s Jr. near you.

REVIEW: Hot Pockets SideShots Mini Cheeseburgers

/ / Reviews / 18 Comments

Hot Pockets SideShots Mini Cheeseburgers

Like Lucky Charms marshmallows, bongs and Kardashian sisters, Hot Pockets come in an array of shapes.

There’s the regular rectangular Hot Pocket, the triangular Panini Hot Pocket, the circular Deep Dish Pizzeria Hot Pocket and you can now add the strapless bra-shaped Hot Pockets SideShots Mini Cheeseburgers.

Unlike most Hot Pockets, these SideShots don’t involve a crisping sleeve. But just like all Hot Pockets, utensils aren’t necessary and they make me say to myself, “What wrong turn have I taken in my life that has led me to eating Hot Pockets?”

The Hot Pockets SideShots Mini Cheeseburgers are made up of bits of seasoned ground beef, cubes of cheese and some kind of sauce enclosed in a soft bun. They come attached in pairs, hence the strapless bra shape, and each pair is as long as a normal rectangular Hot Pocket.

While warming up a pair in the microwave for the recommended time of 1 minute 45 seconds, they made my apartment smell like a bakery, something no other Hot Pocket has ever accomplished. I took that as a sign of good things to come.

Hot Pockets SideShots Mini Cheeseburgers Innards

The buns turned out surprisingly well for something that came out of a microwave oven. They were mostly soft and only a little chewy. But what was even more astonishing to me was that they tasted just like a McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger (or McDouble) — pickles and all.

While the Hot Pockets SideShots Mini Cheeseburgers do taste great, I didn’t think they were very filling and, at three dollars a box, they seem kind of pricey since one can get three heartier McDoubles for the same price. But then again, I guess they shouldn’t be as hearty since I consider consumption of a Hot Pocket as settling for something less than the real thing.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 buns – 300 calories, 10 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 640 milligrams of sodium, 40 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 9 grams of sugar, 12 grams of protein, 10% calcium, 20% thiamine, 10% vitamin B12, 20% folic acid, 15% iron, 15% riboflavin, 15% niacin and 10% phosphorus.)

Item: Hot Pockets SideShots Mini Cheeseburgers
Price: $3.00
Size: 4 pack
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Tastes like a McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger — pickles and all. Buns came out surprisingly well. No trans fat. Contains vitamins and minerals. Made my apartment smell like a bakery. Shaped like a strapless bra.
Cons: Not very filling. Kind of pricey. Taking a wrong turn in your life, which leads you to eating a Hot Pocket. Shaped like a strapless bra.

NEWS: New Chocolate Cheerios Are Going To Be Part of My Complete Breakfast of Chocolate Milk and Nutella Toast

/ / Spotted on Shelves / 8 Comments

Update: Click here to read our Chocolate Cheerios review.

I’ve always wondered when General Mills would come out with a Chocolate Cheerios. It just seemed inevitable since other non-kiddie cereals have gone over to the dark (chocolate) side, like Special K, Frosted Mini Wheats, Chex and Honey Bunches of Oats.

Come on Chocolate Covered Raisin Bran!

Chocolate Cheerios are made with real cocoa, but while they maybe healthier than a bowl of Hershey’s Kisses in a bowl of milk, they’re only slightly better for you than Cocoa Puffs, Cocoa Pebbles or Count Chocula.

A 3/4 cup serving size contains 100 calories, 1 gram of fat, 170 milligrams of sodium, 23 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 9 grams of sugar and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: McDonald’s Frappe (Mocha & Caramel)

/ / Reviews / 34 Comments

McDonald's Frappe

I’m waiting for Starbucks to snap their fingers and say, “Oh, no you didn’t,” in response to the McDonald’s Frappe, which is McDonald’s take on Starbucks’ Frappuccino.

After that point, I hope they get into a shouting match that involves verbal jabs that use their menu items as replacement terms for the violent acts they’re going to do to each other, like “I’m going to go all Grande Espresso on yo’ ass!” or “I’m going to Big Mac yo’ McNuggets!”

The McDonald’s Frappe is the company’s latest product to entice Gap/Banana Republic/J. Crew-wearing Starbucks drinkers into their restaurants. With this new addition to the McCafe menu, you and I will no longer need to wait in long lines, while smelling coffee beans being ground, at Starbucks for our ice blended coffee drink fix.

Instead, we can now wait in the long lines at McDonald’s and smell strips of potatoes being deep fried.

I like my coffee the same way I like my ice cream sundaes, made with ample amounts of cream, sugar, chocolate, caramel and whipped cream, and both the Mocha and Caramel Frappe provides all of that to mask the bitterness of coffee for me. Each Frappe is blended with ice and either a mocha coffee or caramel coffee base, then it’s topped with whipped cream and drizzled with either a chocolate or caramel syrup.

With the Frappe, McDonald’s does an excellent job at combining the flavor of their coffee with the nutrition facts of their burgers. While the Starbucks Frappuccino has more of a coffee flavor, the Frappe has a very strong cream taste. Both flavors were delicious, although I felt they were a bit too sweet. The Caramel one had a flavor that reminded me of coffee ice cream. While not slush-like, both blended beverages contained enough ice granules to provide me the opportunity to crush them between my teeth, which is a simple pleasure of mine, like watching the sunset or plucking the hair to separate my unibrow.

Another difference between the Frappuccino and Frappe are their nutritional values, which in some cases are quite significant. For example, a small Mocha Frappe has 170 more calories, twice the saturated fat, contains trans fat and 20 grams more sugar than a small (Tall) Mocha Frappuccino. Although to be fair, despite being “healthier” than a Frappe, a regular Frappuccino would not help you if you’re trying to fit into your wedding dress or win The Biggest Loser.

The McDonald’s Frappe are a good addition to the McCafe menu. They may have the same amount of calories and fat as a McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger, but I guess that’s to be expected since a Frappe is considered a dessert-type of beverage…and because it’s from the Golden Arches. Both flavors are delicious and I’d probably wait in a line at McDonald’s, with the smell of french fries in the air, to purchase another while wearing a Banana Republic outfit.

(Nutrition Facts – 12 ounces (small) – Mocha – 450 calories, 20 grams of fat, 13 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 125 milligrams of sodium, 62 grams of carbohydrates, 4 grams of fiber, 56 grams of sugar, 7 grams of protein, 15% vitamin A, 20% calcium and 2% iron. Caramel – 450 calories, 20 grams of fat, 13 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 55 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 62 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 57 grams of sugar, 6 grams of protein, 15% vitamin A, 20% calcium and 2% iron.)

Item: McDonald’s Frappe (Mocha & Caramel)
Price: $2.79
Size: Small (12 ounces)
Purchased at: McDonald’s
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Delicious. Reasonably priced. If you enjoy a Frappuccino, you’ll probably enjoy this. Caramel Frappe tastes like coffee ice cream. Using fast food menu items as replacement terms for the violent acts. Plucking eyebrows. Banana Republic Outlets.
Cons: Might be a bit too sweet for some. Worse nutrition facts than Starbucks Frappuccinos. Contains trans fats. Buying clothes at full price at Banana Republic. Waiting in long lines.

Scroll to Top