REVIEW: King Krumb Cookies

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At some point in the last year or so, Walmart decided that it needed to attract a more highbrow clientele. No longer content with simply being the place to get into a fistfight in the flip-flop aisle or play “see who can grab the last can of Great Value ravioli first” with an online shopper, it introduced its “Bettergoods” line, sophisticated fare for a more discerning palate. The line has seemingly been met with good accolades— for the most part, at least from what I’ve seen on the internet— and I can attest to the enjoyability of the “wood-fired” pizza offerings. (Seriously— all of them are surprisingly legit.)

And although the new King Krumb Cookies (all I can think about is how the Simpsons dealt with inadvisable alliteration specifically as it pertained to “Klassic” episodes of Krusty’s “Komedy” show) are not branded as Bettergoods, they are another attempt at self-improvement. I have seen it posited that the KKCs are Walmart’s attempt at luring in customers of Crumbl, a popular national cookie chain. And that may be, but here’s the thing: Crumbl is Crumbl for a reason. Their cookies are large, chewy, soft, and taste freshly made. There is an endless variety of inventive flavors to ensure that hardcore Crumblrs (I made that up) come back with each new fun release and/or seasonal return. The order size is customizable, from a single cookie to a 12-pack, ensuring that you can give yourself a treat or impress a small gathering (or, you know, get the 12-pack yourself and spend a weekend filling yourself with sugar and self-loathing).

On that same token, Walmart is Walmart for a reason, and its King Krumb’s are not Crumbl. They are big, and… well, that’s about where the comparison ends. There are three varieties, and they come in packs of two. For this review, I went with the two-pack featuring Decadent Chocolate Chunk (DCC) and Triple Chocolate Fudge (TCF) (The DCC is also paired with a Confetti Birthday Cake version.)

Upon my first bite of the DCC cookie, my first thought was Chips Ahoy because that’s exactly what it tasted like— a chewy Chips Ahoy. It was, put in the simplest possible way, a generic chocolate chip cookie. The TCF was a little better straight out of the box, set apart by a distinctly fudgy undertone. The box suggests wrapping them in a paper towel and microwaving for 20 seconds. Never one to disobey a box— and as a firm proponent of warm cookies— I did just this. And while it DID make each cookie considerably more enjoyable, it also turned them both into soggy, nearly impossible to eat messes. Even still, the improvement bump from microwaving did little to set them apart from any of Walmart’s other pre-packaged bakery cookies.

In the end, this feels like just another stretch in Walmart’s effort to make themselves something that they’re not. They’d be better served leaving big, warm cookies to the Insomnias and Crumbls of the world.

Purchased Price: $5.97
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: Decadent Chocolate Chunk 6 out of 10, Triple Chocolate Fudge 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1/3rd cookie) DCC – 220 calories, 11 grams of fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 33 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 21 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein, TCF – 220 calories, 10 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 115 milligrams of sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 2 gram of fiber, 19 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein

REVIEW: Selena Gomez Oreo Cookies

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As Selena Gomez’s hit song said, the heart wants what it wants. My heart wants more Oreo collaborations—not because I crave connection to a favorite star, but because Oreo’s celebrity collaborations yield interesting and inventive flavors. As we junk food fans know, wild possibilities are endless. If we work together, can we manifest a Judge Judy or Weird Al Yankovic Oreo?

In the meantime, I’ll let Selena Gomez Oreo Cookies imbue some glamor and spice in my life. Dressed in pink foil packaging, the cookies follow the Post Malone Oreo as the latest limited edition Oreo-celebrity collaboration. Selena’s signature Oreo is a “horchata-inspired” sandwich cookie. Broken down, the sandwich consists of chocolate cinnamon wafer cookies and two crèmes: chocolate cinnamon and sweetened condensed milk with cinnamon sugar.

Yes, you read “cinnamon” three times in that last sentence. While the individual cinnamon-kissed components are fantastic, the spice somewhat dominates the cookie. The wafers taste like cinnamon cookies touched with cocoa, something like chocolate speculoos. Both cremes are delicious, but the sweetened condensed milk crème is so good that future Oreo muse Weird Al might write a song about it. Its rich milkiness carries a hint of caramelization that makes regular Oreo crème seem like a sugary bore in comparison. Its cinnamon sugar crystals add more flavor than texture without much noticeable grit or crunch.

As one bite, the Oreo loses the nuances that make each component exciting. Cinnamon takes over, and while the cocoa is enough to make the cookie taste different from any number of Cinnamon Toast Crunch products on the market, it’s not enough to taste very chocolatey. I’m not sure both cremes needed cinnamon elements, and I would have loved more of the condensed milk creme to balance out the flavors. Like a cup of cinnamon hot cocoa on a cold day, the cookies’ unexpected combination of sweetness and spice hits the spot, but I didn’t like them as well as the Post Malone Oreos.

Like that product, the Selena Gomez cookies include embossed wafer designs (like headphones, a heart, and the star’s signature) and a QR code on the package that leads to exclusive content for fans.

Whether you adore Selena (Selenators, there’s an embossed wafer dedicated to you!) or cinnamon (cinna-minions, show yourselves!), these Oreos are a must-try. While I would have preferred more chocolate or condensed milk creme, I will still finish the package as I dream up new collaborations. If Selena can convince costars Steve Martin and Martin Short to collaborate on a Double Stuf Oreo, I’ll buy a second package.

Purchased Price: $5.29
Size: 10.68 oz package
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) 140 calories, 7 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 60 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Chips Ahoy Chewy Ice Cream Sandwich Inspired Cookies

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Chips Ahoy! has brought us a special summer edition of its Chewy line, and it is Ice Cream Sandwich-inspired. The cookies are regular Chewy Chips Ahoy! with a vanilla creme filling (which is about as basic as you can possibly get). These are exclusive to Walmart.

At room temperature, these cookies are really tasty. It’s hard to go wrong with chocolate chip cookies, but the vanilla creme doesn’t do much.

The packaging says to “Chill for a Treat!” So I tried them frozen. And in that case, they were more reminiscent of ice cream sandwiches, though the texture of the cookies was a little less enjoyable. The frozen filling’s flavor seems a little more noticeable when it’s cold.

And, of course, I had to know if these ice cream sandwich cookies work for ice cream sandwiches. They do, but just because they’re cookies. The filling just gets lost with all the textures when I add ice cream. To be honest, any old cookie would do.

Speaking of filling, I’ve noticed that the distribution is uneven. Some bites have a good quantity of vanilla creme, while others have only little.

I enjoy Chips Ahoy Chewy Ice Cream Sandwich Inspired Cookies, but there’s nothing special about them. I don’t know why the folks at Mondelez bothered to pay the graphic designer to brand them as “summer edition” with a surfboard and summer iconography. If they want to convince me these are a summer treat, they’ll have to come up with something more creative.

Purchased Price: $4.78
Size: 9.9 oz package
Purchased at: Walmart (Exclusive)
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) 140 calories, 7 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 12 grams of sugar including 11 grams of added sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Chocolate Covered Pretzel Oreo Cookies

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It’s the Year of Salty Oreo Cookies!

Okay, there have only been two of them so far in 2025 — the Post Malone Taste Twist Oreo with salted caramel and shortbread flavored creme and this new Limited Edition Chocolate Covered Pretzel Oreo with pretzel flavored cookies with salt and chocolate flavor creme. But who knows what the rest of the year holds? I think Oreo has something great here with these sweet and salty varieties, and the brand knows it, too.

First, at a quick glance, nothing about these suggests the wafers are pretzel-flavored. They look a bit more sun-kissed than Golden Oreo wafers, and if you look closely, there might be a salt grain here and there within the nooks and crannies of the cookie. But they give nothing away to how they might taste. Even their scent is too sweet to make me think of pretzels. While they look like the Hawaii beach cousins of Golden Oreo cookies, their flavor is noticeably different, brah. However, I don’t recognize any pretzel after trying them on their own and with the chocolate creme.

But that ended up not being a bad thing.

The dark-colored creme is similar to the standard chocolate one that Oreo has used for decades. But the addition of salt, which also appears on the creme, enhances the filling’s flavor, which in turn helps make the whole cookie taste wonderful. The goodness of sweet and salty is present with every bite, and while I can’t say there’s a bit of a pretzel, I can say these are delicious and must-buy if you’re into sweet and salty products.

Limited Edition Chocolate Covered Pretzel Oreo is one of those flavors I want to return after its limited run ends, like Cotton Candy and BLUEBERRY PIE. Dammit, when is Blueberry Pie coming back, Oreo!

Even though pretzel was supposed to be one of the highlighting flavors, I’m glad these don’t taste like they have any because I don’t think I would’ve enjoyed their sweet and salty flavor as much as I did.

Now, how about Limited Edition Chocolate Covered Potato Chip Oreo Cookies to keep the Year of Salty Oreo Cookies rolling?

DISCLOSURE: I received a free product sample from Oreo. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 10.68 oz package
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) 140 calories, 6 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 180 milligrams of cholesterol, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar (including 11 grams of added sugar), and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Keebler Harry Potter Butterbeer Fudge Stripes

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Keebler’s new Butterbeer Fudge Stripes are the first Harry Potter-themed confection I’ve tried since a traumatizing run-in with a box of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Bean, so needless to say, I was trepidatious.

It’s hard to Obliviate your first earwax-flavored Jelly Belly. Just thinking about those cursed beans makes me freeze up in fear as if I were struck by the Immobulous charm. Yeah, I’ve seen the movies, folks. I know spells, at least like six of them. I didn’t read a single word of the books, but I know spells! Uh… Oculus Reparo! See?

I know you can see because I just fixed your glasses.

Anyway, despite being a fan of the Potter films, I’ve never actually had Butterbeer. I’ve had butterscotch. I’ve had butter rum, but that’s the extent of my forays into Butter *insert type of booze here.* I honestly don’t even really know much about the flavor profile of Butterbeer, so I wasn’t sure what to expect-O PATRONUM! Remember that one?!

Ya know, I gotta hand it to the elves, be it tree or house, we got ourselves a nice little collab here. Ernie met Dobby, and they baked up a solid little cookie.

These biscuits, for my British friends, reek of a Waffle Crisp-style cereal, but there’s no maple because Butterbeer IS butterscotch. I think. Perhaps my muggle brain can’t comprehend the subtle differences, but for all intents and purposes, these Quidditch goal-shaped rings taste like butterscotch. I assumed there’d be something a bit more foreign that tasted new to me, but I wasn’t disappointed.

The cookie base is the familiar Fudge Stripe sans fudge stripes, but instead piped with a white Butterbeer(scotch) icing.

As you know, Fudge Stripes are named after Cornelius Fudge, the thirty-second Minister of Magic, and Sorkelport Stripes, a legendary Hogwarts professor that I just made up. It is ultimately they who inspired this snack sorcery, and I think Keebler did them proud.

If you’re not a butterscotch lover, don’t worry, the flavor isn’t as pronounced as the classic hard candies. I’d say it exists in the same sweetness realm as dulce de leche and salted caramel fare we’ve become accustomed to, with these almost pushing “too sweet” but still quite indulgent and enjoyable for a cookie or three. Dare I say good enough to Expelliarmus anyone trying to steal one.

By now, it’s quite apparent – I know my Potter, huh?! Well, maybe not enough to decipher what I’m supposed to be seeing on each cookie, but these do seem to have fun little Wizarding World-specific designs that get swallowed up in the icing, so that’s fun, I guess.

I’d consider these a success, and I like to believe Harry, Hermoine, and… whatshisface would definitely buy a pack from the Hogwarts Express trolley.

It’s also nice to see butterscotch getting a little shine with all this butterbeer stuff hitting shelves. It’s a nice change of pace flavor that’s rarely seen outside of grandma’s candy dish.

Ron! His name is Ron. How could I forget Ron, that’s just Riddickulus! (Six. Told ya.)

Purchased Price: $2.98
Size: 9.5 oz package
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 Cookies) 140 calories, 7 grams of fat, 4 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 70 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 9 grams of sugar (including 8 grams of added sugar), and 1 gram of protein.

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