REVIEW: Dunkin’ Breakfast Taco

I think we’ve all gotten a little sloppy with our fast food naming conventions. Put something inside a tortilla shell and we’ll call it a taco. That’s pretty much what I was expecting from Dunkin’s new “Spring” item, the Breakfast Taco. I figured it would just be some eggs, cheese, maybe a little bacon, and…wait, Dunkin’ already makes that. It’s called the Wake-up Wrap, and it’s been on the menu for ages.

I was concerned: Was it possible that Dunkin’ was relaunching almost the exact same product under a different name? Who do they think they are, Taco Bell?

But no, Dunkin’ made something that’s not only different from its other offerings but hard to find anywhere in fast food breakfast land: a taco with a flavor profile that bespeaks its Mexican origins.

First, there are two versions: plain or with a bacon topping. I wanted to actually taste all of the subtle flavors without having to deal with that overbearing bacon flavor, so I went with the first option.

The taco starts with corn. Dunkin’ calls it “fire-roasted corn,” but it didn’t taste particularly roasted to me; it was just a pleasant, sweet flavor. Not overly sweet or syrupy, but just the natural sweetness of the vegetable. At first, the corn was so dominant that it was hard to discern the other flavors, but it’s a dish with surprising depth. I noticed more subtle flavor notes as I ate, which is an experience I don’t often get with breakfast food.

One of those subtle flavors is from the jalapenos. I need to be clear that this is not a very spicy item; the heat is mild and just quietly adds depth. Sometimes, when I make curry for dinner, I make it with only a smidgen of spices so that my spice-timid 7-year-old will eat it. That’s the kind of heat level this is: you know it’s there, and that’s enough.

I also picked out the herbaceous bite of cilantro, which adds a lot of brightness. More prominent is the melted sharp white cheddar cheese, which adds a dairy tang to the proceedings. It isn’t noticeable in every bite but offers a nice, salty contrast when it pops up.

Lastly, there is a “tangy” lime crema, but I only really tasted it at the very end of the taco, when all I had left was crema and a little tortilla. It could have just been my taco, or maybe the crema is another ingredient that is meant to be subtle.

Dunkin’ could have bunted the ball here and just made glorified scrambled eggs in a tortilla shell, but it went the extra mile and is offering customers a novel experience, not just different from other Dunkin’ menu items but different, period. Will it win out over more cheesy, eggy, bready foods in my personal breakfast rotation? Maybe. While I may not order it every time I go to Dunkin’, I’m really glad the option is there. I take my hat off to Dunkin’ for trying something new.

Purchased Price: $2.59
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 180 calories, 9 grams of fat, 4 grams of saturated fat, 100 milligrams of cholesterol, 500 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 2 grams of sugar, and 8 grams of protein.

REVIEW: McDonald’s New Lemonade (2023)

Sweet, tart, refreshing… lemonade is so popular for a reason, sure. But it can also be pretty easy to mess up. In ye olden days of about a few weeks ago, back when McDonald’s used to serve syrupy Minute Maid lemonade, it wasn’t exactly the nectar of the gods, but it was predictable. The Minute Maid has now been replaced by McDonald’s new lemonade (ironically referred to on its menu as “classic”), which was an unknown quantity for me.

To briefly break down the difference, this new brew is described by Mickey D’s as “made with real lemon juice, bits of lemon pulp and real cane sugar.” Conversely, Minute Maid is maid with high fructose corn syrup instead of sugar, and it also doesn’t contain pulp. So, these two citrusy sips have their distinctions, and you can taste them.

I was a little concerned that I wouldn’t be able to find the words to review something as straightforward as lemonade, but from my very first taste, one word flashed brightly in my mind, as bold as Ronald McDonald’s wig: TART. I had wondered whether this new lemonade might be on the saccharine side like its predecessor, but there was nothing mild about its lip-puckering intensity. That cane sugar does lend some welcome notes of sweetness to avoid feeling like you’re straight up licking a lemon, but the dominant flavor is definitely sour.

I had also suspected that this lemonade might taste watered down, but I’m pleased to report that that was not the case. The taste was rather smooth and robust, so much so that when I had to take a phone call mid review and returned to find my ice cubes melted, the flavor was hardly diminished (in fact, with the sharp edges of sourness slightly toned down the lemonade might have even tasted better).

Of course, I also have to mention the potentially-controversial addition of pulp, and I have to mention that I barely noticed it. The pulp was most obvious when I peered at the bottom of my cup, and yes, when I jostled the cup I could clearly see it swirling throughout, but its presence was less felt in the taste, with most pulp bits short and thin enough that I hardly realized they were there as I drank. The occasional larger chunk was more apparent, but I found that these just added some welcome texture.

Overall, the potent pucker power of McDonald’s new lemonade might be a touch too tart for some tastes, but if you can suck it up — literally! — this juice is worth the squeeze.

Purchased Price: $2.60
Size: Small
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 150 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 10 milligrams of sodium, 37 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 34 grams of sugar (including 34 grams of added sugar), and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: KFC Double Down (2023)

When the KFC Double Down was released nationwide in 2010, it instantly became part of the cultural zeitgeist. It was joked about on late night shows and pointed as to why Americans were so obese. Yet, in the four years it was on the menu, I never tried it. However, once it was gone, I regretted not taking the time to seek it out.

Thankfully, many companies have learned that nostalgia is a great way to boost sales, and my chance to try the sandwich has come. The KFC Double Down was rereleased on March 6th and is (currently) only expected to be offered for four weeks. In lieu of buns, there are two 100% white meat chicken Extra Crispy filets. Between them are two slices of cheese, two slices of bacon, and Colonel’s real mayo or spicy sauce. As I always like to try the original version first, I opted for the mayo over the spicy.

Usually, the 10-minute travel from the restaurant to home can have a negative impact on an item, but in the case of the Double Down, it ended up working in its favor. Before leaving, I checked to make sure my order was correct and noticed the cheese was unmelted. When I got home, it was perfectly gooey after sitting in its foil bag.

I was actually shocked by the size of the sandwich. I knew it would be big, but it was bigger than I thought. Cutting it in half was easy and made eating it a less daunting experience.

I got about as perfect of a first bite as you could possibly want. The crispy, tender chicken filet was a great base for the melty cheese, smokey bacon, and creamy mayo. The familiar blend of KFC spices shined but didn’t overpower the sandwich. All four ingredients worked together to create a unique flavor that made me understand why people started petitions to bring back the Double Down.

My only real issue is the lack of nutritional information. I like being somewhat informed about what I’m eating, but KFC has only released the calorie numbers. Unfortunately, it’s not as simple as looking at the original sandwich’s stats, as the 2023 version is 410 calories more than the 2010 one. It’s safe to assume the other numbers must also be much higher.

While I cannot compare it to the original, the 2023 KFC Double Down was an absolute delight. Gimmick foods rarely live up to the hype, but the Double Down certainly exceeded my expectations. It isn’t an item that I would eat with any regularity, but I would love to see it receive the Shamrock Shake treatment and be released yearly for a limited time.

Purchased Price: $8.99
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 950 calories (other nutrition numbers aren’t available)

REVIEW: Burger King Spicy Chicken Fries

I’m not sure chicken fries are a product that anyone was really asking for. No one eats chicken tenders and then says, “You know, I’d like these to be thinner. A lot thinner.” At least, I’m pretty sure no one does; you do you.

Needless to say, I was skeptical about the potential appeal here with Burger King’s new Spicy Chicken Fries. I expected them to be dry little strips of chicken fried to oblivion, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. I am enough of a fried food enthusiast that sometimes, I actually like over-fried food in a masochistic sort of way. But I wasn’t expecting anything that would be good in any sort of objective sense of the word.

However, after getting these out of their paper carton, adorned with a scowling cartoon chicken (unlike the non-spicy chicken fries, which feature a happier chicken), I took my first bite. My first immediate thought was that I wished the serving size was bigger, which pretty much tells you all you need to know right there. But I am supposed to write more than a few sentences, so I guess I should carry on.

The spice level is just about perfect. These things are about as spicy as the (excellent) Wendy’s Spicy Chicken Nuggets, or perhaps just a tad spicier. It’s a zingy kind of spicy that stops just short of making your nose run. If you want something really spicy that’s going to give you a Nashville Hot Chicken kind of feeling, these are not going to do it, but let’s be realistic: nobody goes to Burger King looking for that kind of experience. That said, if you paired these with the quite good BK Mexican Chicken Sandwich I reviewed just a few months ago, it would be a lovely meal for a spice fan.

Perhaps more important than the spice level is the chicken, which is really moist and flavorful. A lot of fried chicken products are dry (like, say, oh I don’t know, DAIRY QUEEN — you know what you did, DQ. Stick to ice cream.) But these are just perfectly moist little mouthfuls that have real chicken flavor, not just that generic, salty fast-food-protein flavor.

The breading is interesting: it’s more like the breading you get on a mozzarella stick than a chicken nugget or tender, which works nicely. But to be honest, I barely noticed the outside shell when I was eating. Logically I know that the spicy flavor comes from the outside layer, but beyond contributing spice, the grainy breading stands back and lets you go to Happy Succulent Chicken Land without getting in your way.

I did not think to try the fries with any of the sauces, but honestly, I think that would be a waste. These things don’t need anything else.

Do you know what would be awesome, though? If BK made these spicy chicken fries in a larger, chicken tender format and really entered the competitive fried chicken world. Give KFC a run for its money, BK. I’ll be rooting for you.

Purchased Price: $3.69
Size: 9 pieces
Rating: 10 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 250 calories, 14 grams of fat, 2 grams saturated fat, 750 mg sodium, 17 grams carbohydrates, 40 milligrams cholesterol, 0 grams sugar, 1 gram fiber, and 14 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Churro Dipped Cone

Successfully purchasing Dairy Queen’s new Churro Dipped Cone involved facing my two biggest fast food fears. On my first attempt, Dairy Queen had run completely out of what I’d come all the way there to get. On my second, I endured several awkward moments of blank stares from an employee who’d never heard of what I was ordering and had to confirm its existence through a lengthy chat with his manager. Fortunately, I was ultimately able to claim my prize, a big (seriously, am I the only one who didn’t realize just HOW large Dairy Queen’s “large” size is?), beautiful, rust-colored confection.

After all that hubbub, the Churro Dipped Cone — Dairy Queen’s classically curvaceous vanilla soft serve outfitted with a new churro-flavored shell — tasted like victory. It also tasted like, well, a churro. Sort of? It was certainly sweet and cinnamon-y (an apple cider donut was actually the first baked good it reminded me of, though maybe it’s just because I’ve had one recently), with a particularly zesty aftertaste thanks to the smattering of actual cinnamon sugar that coats the coating. But since it’s just churro-inspired without featuring any actual churro pieces, the classic crunchy texture is lacking. Though that’s not to suggest that the churro coating doesn’t have a lovely texture of its own! It was so thick that each time I bit off a flake, I was rewarded with an audible THUNK, and the ensuing experience of chomping into each hefty shard and savoring the sweetness and hint of spice as it melted in my mouth was wonderful.

Aesthetics-wise, I also appreciate that my cone didn’t look too uncannily perfect. The method behind DQ’s dipping madness involves dunking a naked vanilla cone into a vat of liquid which then solidifies around it into the iconic crisp coating. That means that each Churro Dipped Cone is unique, like the snowflakes that were fittingly falling around me as I sampled my seasonally inappropriate dessert. Mine certainly didn’t have the most even application, alternating between visibly thicker layers and bald patches with no coating at all. Those had the side effect of making it particularly messy to eat since, as the ice cream melted, droplets started gushing out through the gaps and all over my hands. I’m thankful the Dairy Queen employee had way more foresight than I did and provided me with a large bundle of napkins, all of which got used!

Prying off a bit of churro shell or lapping up some stray ice cream dribbles is all well and good, but my biggest gripe is what happened when I ambitiously tried to capture both elements in the same mouthful. The coldness of the ice cream immediately overpowered the mild flavor of the coating, suddenly rendering the subtle churro notes more or less tasteless. Dairy Queen’s vanilla ice cream is top-notch – rich, sweet, and creamy. It hits all the notes you’d expect and about as well as you could expect it to, but it wasn’t what I intended or expected to be the star of the churro show.

All in all, this tasty treat is as good an excuse to make a Dairy Queen run as any, but I’m not sure it will satisfy any actual churro cravings.

Purchased Price: $4.08
Size: Large
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 630 calories, 28 grams of fat, 22 grams of saturated fat, 45 milligrams of cholesterol, 220 milligrams of sodium, 682 grams of carbohydrates (EDITOR’S NOTE: This is the number on the DQ website, the medium has 40 grams so it’s probably 68 grams), 62 gram of sugar, and 12 grams of protein.