REVIEW: Life Savers Butter Rum Candy Canes

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Life Savers Butter Rum Candy Canes

Candy canes have two primary purposes. And the new Life Savers Butter Rum Candy Canes do a good job of fulfilling both purposes.

The first purpose is to be a festive decoration.

The color of a Butter Rum Lifesaver does not exactly conjure up images of Kris Kringle or winter wonderlands. Sia’s new Christmas song “Candy Cane Lane” describes a whole array of candy cane colors, yet brown or tan are not among them.

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Nevertheless, Life Savers Butter Rum Candy Canes are surprisingly festive and attractive, with a white base and two different shades of gold and brown. It looks way better than it would be if it were one solid rum color.

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It’s not as Christmassy as a traditional red, or even as festive as the multicolored cherry ones. But it would be perfect on a tree decorated with lots of gold ornaments, if that’s your thing. (It’s not mine.) I was surprised to find that the candy canes have inconsistent lengths.

The second purpose of a candy cane is, of course, to be candy. Peppermint is the classic flavor, and my favorite, but lots of people don’t like that, especially children. Kids tend to prefer fruity flavors, but I find them sickeningly sweet and artificial.

These Butter Rum Candy Canes will be a wonderful middle ground and will appeal to adults and kids. They taste like I remember ordinary Butter Rum Life Savers. Admittedly, it’s been a while since I had them, so I don’t know if they’re exactly the same, but if not, they’re close enough. The canes taste like a butterscotch candy, but a little more buttery. (I’m a teetotaler, so I can’t tell you if they taste like rum.)

I never noticed it until I had this variety, but there is a subtle candy cane flavor to most candy canes. I’m not talking about peppermint, but an underlying flavor that is unrelated to whatever the “real” flavor is. Peppermint candy canes have it, fruity candy canes have it, and these Butter Rum Candy Canes have it. Maybe I’m mistaking texture for flavor, but regardless, these definitely belong in the candy cane family.

Since these are true candy canes, they do come with typical candy cane hazards. The colored stripes dissolve faster than the white matrix and create sharp edges.

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Additionally, you can suck them into sharp swords. I associate swords with pirates. I also associate rum with pirates, so it fits.

I’m a mint-thusiast, so I’ll generally stick with the peppermint. But these are the best non-mint candy canes I’ve had in a while.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 cane – 50 calories, 0 grams of fat, 20 milligrams of sodium, 12 grams of carbohydrates, 9 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein..)

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 5.28 oz. box
Purchased at: Walgreens
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Tastes like Butter Rum Life Savers. A tasty middle ground between fruity and peppermint flavors. Looks festive even though it’s brown.
Cons: Typical candy cane hazards of sharpness. Butter Rum Life Savers do not have a naturally festive color.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Banana Nut Cheerios

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Limited Edition Banana Nut Cheerios

Every time I see a new banana-flavored product on shelves, my inner Primate comes out. I have to fight the urge to beat my chest like an excited gorilla right there in the aisle.

There’s something about that flavor that always resonates with me. Cakes, breads, candies, ice cream, yogurts, it doesn’t matter – if you make it banana, you’ve got my money.

Sadly, I haven’t tasted many cereals flavored with the fruit. There’s never been a huge market for them, and when they do come out, they always seem to get discontinued. I can recall a few Honey Bunches of Oats types and a Minion one, but beyond that my experience with them are lacking.

Good thing Limited Edition Banana Nut Cheerios has come to my rescue.

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I wish I could tell you I got a waft of fresh banana bread when I tore the bag open, but in reality, the smell was kinda indistinguishable. I don’t know, I expected more, but to me it wasn’t distinctly banana.

Since these are “banana nut” flavored, I figured I’d try them with almond milk as well as whole milk. I also had Egg Nog, but couldn’t pull the trigger on using that as milk, despite the pleas from the voices inside my head.

I considered mixing in slices of the yellow fruit, but I’m of the controversial opinion that putting slimy fruit pieces in cereal doesn’t enhance it all that much.

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With the first bite, I got hit with cinnamon, but that instantly blended into the banana flavor. Don’t expect anything overly sweet, because this uses real fruit puree, not artificial flavor. (More on that later.)

On the next few bites, I realized this variety may as well have been any Cheerios flavor. It all mushed into generic Cheerios. While there were hints of a great cereal there, it was short lived.

Now I was ready to call Banana Nut Cheerios a big disappointment when it hit me with the hidden ace up its sleeve – delicious cereal milk.

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Let me backtrack. The “whole” milk cereal was delicious. Unflavored almond milk is worthless, especially with cereal. The “nuttiness” did nothing to enhance the flavor. Not only that, it’s more watery than skim, and made for a mundane bowl.

Whole milk, however, soaked into the little O’s and made it come to life. You’d be hard pressed to find many cereals that improve as they sog, but this one bucked the trend. The flavor improved as they settled and the runoff culminated in banana bread-flavored creaminess.

Still, I left a tad underwhelmed. I must just prefer a sugary artificial flavor to natural. I guess that’s the kid in me. I’d be all in on Banana Toast Crunch.

Banana Nut Cheerios are worth a try, but they weren’t better than reliable Honey Nut variety. If you can only afford one box, I’d recommend the Chocolate Peanut Butter Cheerios over these as well.

(Nutrition Facts – 3/4 cup – 110 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 80 milligrams of potassium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 8 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 12 oz. box
Purchased at: Stop & Shop
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Creamy delicious cereal milk. Decent banana flavor. Nice cinnamon kick. Oatey nuttiness peaks through. The prospects of Banana Toast Crunch.
Cons: Lacked strong banana aroma. Tasted best after the sog. Middle of the road Cheerios flavor. Limited Edition like all banana cereals. There’s no Banana Toast Crunch.

REVIEW: Starbucks Toffee Almondmilk Hot Cocoa

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Starbucks Toffee Almondmilk Hot Cocoa

It’s been Christmas season for me since Starbucks released their holiday drinks and cups on November 1st. Yes, I’ve been blasting Christmas music for a solid month now.

So, I was pleasantly surprised to get another holiday surprise when Starbucks released a new festive hot chocolate – Toffee Almondmilk Hot Cocoa. It joins Peppermint, Snickerdoodle, and Salted Caramel on the seasonal hot cocoa menu this season.

While they all sound fantastic, Toffee Almondmilk Hot Cocoa (steamed almondmilk with mocha sauce and toffee nut syrup, finished with whipped cream and Caramel Brulée topping) is the star in this lineup because it’s the first Holiday drink that prominently features almond milk. This means it can be vegan and non-dairy when ordered without the whipped cream — no substitutions are needed like with other Holiday drinks.

But that’s not all when you order now (said in my best infomercial voice), you don’t have to pay extra for the almond milk! It’s usually 60 cents more to substitute drinks with almond milk at Starbucks, but this drink costs the same as all the others! Winning!

In full disclosure, I’m not vegan or lactose intolerant. I eat all meats and drink whole milk, but I do have vegetarian days. I believe the term du jour is “flexitarian.” Oui oui!

Now on to the good good.

When I first received my drink, it looked like a whipped cream wonderland speckled with brown sugar crystals (the Caramel Brulée topping). Naturally, I plucked one off and tried it. It was just sugary and feels like the candy that gets stuck in your teeth – nowhere near as bad as say a Butterfinger though. Its flavor was fine on its own.

I particularly enjoyed my first sip because of the temperature contrast with the cool whipped cream and warm drink. I immediately tasted the chocolate from the mocha sauce, but didn’t really pick up on the distinct toffee nut. I could tell there was a subtle “je ne sais quoi” but I took a blind taste test, I wouldn’t be able to say that it was toffee nut. But as I continued drinking, I almost forgot it was an almond milk hot chocolate. I was amazed and surprised by its richness.

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But, I didn’t love the topping with the drink. When I did get some of the topping in my sip, I didn’t enjoy that it was large enough to require chewing. It also threw the sweetness balance off because the drink itself wasn’t overly sweet or artificial tasting despite the four pumps of sauce and syrup. But the topping pushed it over the sugar edge. I actually liked it better without it.

As whole milk’s #1 fan, I’m overall very impressed by Starbucks’ execution with almond milk (except for their decision to make almondmilk one word). I also love that Starbucks is being extra inclusive this holiday season; this new release is great for vegans and non-vegans alike. It’s officially been added to my Starbucks holiday drink rotation!

(Nutrition Facts – Grande – 280 calories, 14 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 20 milligrams of cholesterol, 240 milligrams of sodium, 34 grams of carbohydrates, 28 grams of total sugars, 4 grams of protein, and 15 mg of caffeine.)

Purchased Price: $3.75
Size: Grande
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: It’s vegan and non-dairy when ordered without whipped cream. No additional cost for almond milk = winning! Surprisingly rich for almond milk.
Cons: Toffee nut, who? Caramel Brulée topping is gratuitous.

REVIEW: Coke Freestyle 2017 Holiday Mixes (North Pole Magic and Arctic Chill)

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Coke Freestyle 2017 Holiday Mixes

One of the more understated junk food rites of the holiday season has to be Coca-Cola’s seasonal Freestyle mixes. Since they’re not ubiquitously marketed like everything else Coke does, they always seem to sneak up on you as quaint, L-T-O surprises at the local cineplex or friendly neighborhood Burger King.

Well, if you fancied previous seasonal flavors like Secret Santa and Mistletoe Flow, you’ll probably get a yuletide kick out of the latest additions to the Coke Freestyle family – the aptly named North Pole Magic and Arctic Chill.

Aesthetically, there isn’t much to say about either beverage. They both have a pleasant, reddish brown hue, with the Arctic Chill variation looking lighter than North Pole Magic. In terms of scent, they smell practically identical – as soon as your olfactory glands whiff the drinks, the aroma is unmistakable. You’ve got orange, you’ve got vanilla and you’ve got something else that you can’t quite put your finger on for the initial sniff. But that becomes very apparent once the drinks start tangoing with your taste buds.

Coke Freestyle North Pole Magic

We’ll start with North Pole Magic (NPM) because it’s the stronger of the two (both in terms of figurative quality and literal flavor). The beverage tastes pretty much the same way it smells. I’ve read some Internet posts that say NPM is one part vanilla, one part cherry, and one part root beer, but I beg to differ. To these tastebuds, anyway, NPM is one part Coca-Cola, one part orange creme and one part vanilla – in short, sherbet-flavored Coke.

In all my years I’ve never once imagined what a Yabba Dabba Do Orange Flinstones Push Up-flavored Coca-Cola variation would taste like, but I’ll be tickled pink if NPM isn’t one of the most delicious Coke permutations I’ve tasted in quite some time. This stuff is too yummy to be relegated to those bright red touchscreen terminals – Coke definitely needs to put this in bottle and can form come next Christmas.

Coke Freestyle ArcticChill

Arctic Chill (AC) – which is fighting under the less calorie-dense Coca-Cola Zero umbrella – is pretty much the same thing as NPM, except…well, not as flavorful.

I hate to use the term “watered down,” but that’s precisely what AC tastes like compared to NPM. It’s still pretty good, but the Coke Zero taste completely overwhelms the sherbet flavor. In fact, you only get the sherbet flavor as a ghostly aftertaste – almost as if you were drinking a Coke Zero in a cup somebody momentarily used as a holster for a creamsicle for about five seconds. Again, it’s not a bad soda by any stretch, it’s just that compared to NPM it feels like a mild imitation.

Regardless, you really can’t go wrong with either flavor. And Coke definitely needs to be commended for thinking outside the box for these holiday mixes – thank goodness they eschewed the all too predictable gingerbread and candy cane flavors in favor of one that’s great, no matter the time of year.

(Nutrition Facts – Not available.)

Purchased Price: $1.69
Size: 20 oz. cup
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 8 out of 10 (North Pole Magic)
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Arctic Chill)
Pros: A robust, creamsicle flavor. You’ve got options if you’re trying to count calories. The theoretical ability to combine each flavor with Diet Dr. Pepper and peach Sprite, because Y.O.L.O.
Cons: Arctic Chill tastes pretty watered down compared to North Pole Magic. Only being able to drink the sodas at the movies or while you’re shopping at the grocery store. Wondering how much it would cost to bribe the store to look the other way while you fill up a water cooler jug.

REVIEW: Drake’s Fudge Dipped Devil Dogs

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Drake s Fudge Dipped Devil Dogs

I like my food plain and dry. I eat sandwiches without condiments. Cereal without milk. I credit two things for this strange (according to the world) habit. First, the “Don’t Drown Your Food” public service announcement that ran during Saturday morning cartoons. What can I say, it really stuck with me. Second, the driest snack cakes known to mankind – Devil Dogs. It’s little wonder these cakes are bone-shaped, as in “Dry as a…”

As a child, I took it as a test of my junk food mettle to down a whole Devil Dog (or multiple) without a drink. It was the ‘80s equivalent to the Cinnamon Challenge. Nobody could power through those little Saharas like me. It’s a wonder I survived to adulthood without fatally aspirating a chunk of chocolatey desiccant. Sure, there was a layer of frosting between the layers, but we all know that did nothing to offset the plastic-wrapped drought that is Devil Dogs.

Despite Devil Dogs’ apparent desire to kill me, I love them dearly. They are second only to Hostess Cupcakes in my all-time rankings. But they’ve sat out the recent novelty flavor trend, hence I haven’t paid them much attention lately. So I was delighted to see them re-enter the arena with a new iteration – fudge-dipped. I like it, DD – keeping close to your roots. No garish colors or artificial fruit filling, just more of what you already do well.

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Inside the individual wrappers, I was greeted by the familiar Devil Dog aroma – cocoa-cocoa-cocoa. But a new sensation enveloped my fingers – slightly moist melty chocolate. Like the Ring Dings and Yodels’ shells, Devil Dogs’ new thinny thin covering was body heat sensitive and easily left traces of itself on my hands.

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Compelled by habit, I took the biggest bite possible, expecting the lovely arid velvet to cling to my throat as usual. But three things happened: 1) the fudge coating paved the way for an easy swallow. 2) the cake itself seemed to be slightly less dehydrated – perhaps the chocolate cover held more moisture inside? And 3) the frosting layer was lighter. My memories of Devil Dog filling was a thick, sweet slab. This filling was more like marshmallow – sticky with tiny air pockets. This was a nice change.

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The basic flavor of Devil Dogs was intact – the cocoa cake and the sugary sweet filling. The fudge dip tasted just like Yodels’ and was a logical extension of this classic ‘Dog. The refined textures appealed to the 40+ year-old me who’d rather not eat tiny cakes with the Grim Reaper standing behind me, waiting for his chance.

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Overall, if you’re a fan of Devil Dogs, this is a treat to try. If you can’t handle the realness of Devil “Dry AF” Dogs, you might just be able to take these, with a glass of milk in reach.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 cake – 280 calories, 120 calories from fat, 13 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 39 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 27 grams of total sugars and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 18.32 oz. box (8 cakes)
Purchased at: Food Emporium
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: Familiar Devil Dog cocoa flavor and Yodel-y chocolate shell. Lighter, fluffier filling. Not being choked by complete, utter dryness.
Cons: Not being choked by beautiful, beautiful dryness. I can’t let it go. I just can’t.

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