REVIEW: Burger King BK Chef’s Choice Burgers (Bacon & Bleu and Bacon Cheddar BBQ)

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Burger King Bacon & Bleu BK Chef's Choice Burger

I shall begin this review with the true story of how I ordered the new limited-time-only Burger King Bacon & Bleu and Bacon Cheddar BBQ BK Chef’s Choice Burgers.

When I ordered the new varieties, the employee who rang me up didn’t know what burgers I was talking about, even though on the large LCD screen behind her there was an image promoting all three BK Chef’s Choice Burgers. Unfortunately, the image was part of a slideshow of Burger King’s latest products and the new burgers weren’t anywhere else on the menu board, so when I pointed them out on the screen behind her and she turned her head to look, the image changed to something else. She then gave me a look that I’ve only seen when I ask people to pull my finger. She called over the manager who verified the new burgers and pointed them out on the register.

And that’s how I consumed almost a day’s worth of saturated fat and sodium in one meal.

As for the burgers themselves, I have to say they are the best looking major chain fast food burgers I’ve seen in real life. Okay, they still look nothing like their promotional photos, but they don’t look like the smashed blobs of meat, cheese, and bread that other burgers look like in real life. Of course, my burgers could’ve been made by the slowest and most careful BK employee in the company, so yours may not look like mine.

Burger King Bacon & Bleu BK Chef's Choice Burger Closeup

The Bacon & Bleu BK Chef’s Choice Burger consists of a 5.5-ounce flame-broiled premium ground chuck patty topped with naturally smoked hardwood bacon, Wisconsin buttermilk bleu cheese, romaine lettuce, red onions, tomatoes, and mayo on an artisan-style bun. Maybe it’s the addition of the bleu cheese, but this burger sounds more deserving of the title “Chef’s Choice” than the Bacon Cheddar BBQ one.

The bleu cheese wasn’t crumbled cheese sprinkled on top of the burger, it was more of a chunky bleu cheese spread. I prefer this since the crumbles fell out of other bleu cheese burgers I’ve tried. Although the layer of bleu cheese didn’t look like much, it did pack quite a punch, so much so that it taste bud-blocked almost every other ingredients. The thick bacon slices tasted like bleu cheese. The lettuce, red onions, and tomatoes tasted like bleu cheese. A little bit of the beef patty’s flavor hit my taste buds, but it was mostly bleu cheese. The bleu cheese also made the burger taste really salty. I know. I know. Fast food burger = salty. But, it made this burger taste especially salty. In order to finish it, I had to scrape off the bleu cheese.

Burger King Bacon Cheddar BBQ BK Chef's Choice Burger

My taste buds had a much better experience with the Bacon Cheddar BBQ Chef’s Choice Burger, which is made up of the same beef patty, bacon, lettuce, tomato, red onions, mayo, and bun as the Bacon & Bleu, but also includes two slices of cheddar cheese and a BBQ sauce. The BBQ sauce is the same stuff found in BK’s Western BBQ Topper burger, which I found tasty. Speaking of ingredients found in the Western BBQ Topper, I really wish the Bacon Cheddar BBQ BK Chef’s Choice Burger also had onion rings.

Burger King Bacon Cheddar BBQ BK Chef's Choice Burger Closeup

I’ve complained several times on this blog about flavorless bacon in fast food burgers and cheese being used more as a glue to keep the burger together instead of flavor enhancement, but the thick hardwood bacon slices and mild cheddar cheese in this burger surprised me since I could actually taste both. The beef patty was dry, which is par for the course when it comes to fast food burgers, but I just like with the regular BK Chef’s Choice Burger I enjoyed the flavor of the patty. Overall, it’s a really tasty burger, thanks to the BBQ sauce, meat, cheese, and bacon combination, and it’s my favorite of the three BK Chef’s Choice Burger varieties.

While I didn’t really care for the Bacon & Bleu and enjoyed the Bacon Cheddar BBQ, there’s something that really bothered me about both burgers — the inclusion of mayonnaise. It’s completely unnecessary in either burger when both contain a topping that provides a lot of flavor (i.e. bleu cheese and BBQ sauce). The mayonnaise’s flavor is nonexistent in both burgers, so why include it? Is it there to make sure the lettuce doesn’t fall out? If not, all it really does is include more fat and sodium to burgers that already have a lot of both.

I don’t know if you can still have it your way at Burger King, but if you can, I’d suggest getting the Bacon Cheddar BBQ BK Chef’s Choice Burger without mayo and the Bacon & Bleu BK Chef’s Choice Burger without mayo and less bleu cheese.

(Nutrition Facts – Bacon & Bleu – 760 calories, 51 grams of fat, 20 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 115 milligrams of cholesterol, 1,310 milligrams of sodium, 39 grams of carbohydrates, 17 grams of sugar, and 38 grams of protein. Bacon Cheddar BBQ – 820 calories, 56 grams of fat, 22 grams of saturated fat, 0.5 grams of trans fat, 125 milligrams of cholesterol, 1,800 milligrams of sodium, 45 grams of carbohydrates, 12 grams of sugar, and 40 grams of protein.)

Item: Burger King BK Chef’s Choice Burgers (Bacon & Bleu and Bacon Cheddar BBQ)
Price: $6.99 (sandwich only)
Size: N/A
Purchased at: Burger King
Rating: 4 out of 10 (Bacon & Bleu)
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Bacon Cheddar BBQ)
Pros: Tasty BBQ sauce. Tasty beef patties. Nicest looking fast food burgers I’ve seen in real life. Awesome sources of protein. Thick slices of bacon. I could taste the cheese and bacon!
Cons: Pricey. Dry beef patties. Bleu cheese overwhelms all other ingredients and makes the burger super salty. Dear Lord that’s a lot of sodium and saturated fat. Mayo was unnecessary. The number of times I typed “blue” instead of “bleu” while writing this review.

REVIEW: McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce

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McDonald's Hot Habanero Sauce

Hey! McDonald’s Hot Mustard Sauce! This is not what it looks like. I know it looks like I’m having an affair with your sister, McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce, but I assure you what you see before you is just an accident.

Yes, I can explain why Hot Habanero Sauce is all over my McNuggets. Um…Well, we saw each other and wanted to give each other a hug but while we were walking towards each other, she tripped and her top came off. When I noticed she tripped, I ran to her to try and catch her, but I also tripped and my McNuggets fell out. Since we were falling towards each other, she accidentally ended up on my McNuggets.

Why would I cheat on you Hot Mustard Sauce? We’ve been together for decades and you know I love you.

Okay. Okay. So I’ve cheated on you a few times before. But I didn’t leave you for any of them, so they meant nothing to me. I’m sure if we add it up we’ll find I’ve been loyal to you 99.5 percent of the time. And if you round that up, it’s 100 percent.

Do I think Hot Habanero Sauce is hotter than you? Sure, she’s a six or seven, while you’re a two or three, but you’re older, and you know what they say, “The older the berry, the sweeter the juice.” Hey. Hey. Don’t cry. I mean, you’re hot too, but in a different way.

McDonald's Hot Habanero Sauce Closeup

Oh, I can’t lie to you anymore, Hot Mustard Sauce. All right…You got me! I was cheating on you with Hot Habanero Sauce. But in my defense, I couldn’t help myself because she’s younger, hotter, creamier, and I have a thing for redheads. She even has freckles. Freckles drive me wild!

But after trying the McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce, I realized that you’re still the one that I love to touch. Still the one and I can’t get enough. We’re still having fun, and you’re still the one.

Yes, I just recited song lyrics. I’m sorry.

Did I enjoy myself with Hot Habanero Sauce?

Um, it was fun spending time with her and she’s definitely the hottest item McDonald’s has ever released. She didn’t make me cry, like other habanero products I’ve tried, but after getting through the first container, she made me sweat a little, my nose a little runny, and suggested I drink some soda. I don’t want to experience that every time with my McNuggets, even though she’s quite tasty and a little tangy. But I guess she should be tasty since she’s your sister.

Please don’t leave me, Hot Mustard Sauce. I love you and I promise I’ll never put anything else on my McNuggets ever again.

Psst. Hot Habanero Sauce. Call me.

(Nutrition Facts – Not available on website.)

Other McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce reviews:
An Immovable Feast

Item: McDonald’s Hot Habanero Sauce
Price: Free with McNuggets meal
Size: 0.78 ounces
Purchased at: McDonald’s
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Really good flavor. Younger and hotter than Hot Mustard Sauce. Hottest item McDonald’s has released. Good balance of flavor and heat. Hot Mustard Sauce is hot too, but in a totally different way.
Cons: Cheating on Hot Mustard Sauce…again. Reciting song lyrics when you don’t know what to say after gettting caught cheating. Might not be hot enough for some heat heads.

REVIEW: Jack in the Box BLT Cheeseburger

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Jack in the Box BLT Cheeseburger

To best describe Jack in the Box’s new BLT Cheeseburger, I’d like to use some of the lyrics from this Jack in the Box commercial.

First you take the Jumbo Jack with Cheese.
And then you add strips of bacon and take away the ketchup and onions.
Whaddya get?
BLT Cheeseburger! BLT Cheeseburger! BLT Cheeseburger!

Yes, the Jack in the Box BLT Cheeseburger is basically a baconized Jumbo Jack with Cheese. If you’ve never had the burger with the alliterated name because you’re hundreds of miles away from a Jack in the Box, let me break it down for you.

A Jumbo Jack with Cheese consists of a beef patty topped with lettuce, tomato, onions, pickles, ketchup, a slice of American cheese, and onion mayo in between a sesame seed bun. A BLT Cheeseburger is made up of a beef patty topped with lettuce, tomato, pickles, hickory-smoked bacon, a slice of American Cheese, and onion mayo in between a sesame seed bun. If there was such a thing as fast food DNA, I believe these two burgers would be brothers, sisters, brother and sister, or maybe first cousins.

Jack in the Box BLT Cheeseburger Closeup

One of the ways Jack in the Box has been promoting the burger is with their Marry Bacon website, which follows some dude named Neal who married bacon. Of course, the whole marrying bacon brings up several questions in my head.

How does a slice of bacon say “I do”? How does the stripper at the bachelorette party give a lap dance to a strip of bacon when it has no lap? How does a strip of bacon throw the bouquet? Does the bridal party consist of pigs or other strips of bacon? Where does a strip of bacon put a wedding garter? If the newlyweds vacation at a beach resort and go sunbathing, will the bacon shrink as it fries in the sun? Also, how does one consummate a marriage to bacon?

I’ll never know the answer to those questions, but I do know the answer to this question: Does the bacon in the BLT Cheeseburger make me want to marry bacon or, at least, fondle a BLT Cheeseburger whenever I’m at a Jack in the Box?

Maybe.

Jack in the Box BLT Cheeseburger Innards

Last year, Jack in the Box started using a different type of bacon and I have to say that it’s an improvement over the old stuff. And thank goodness it is because there’s a lot of bacon in this burger. It’s crispier and its flavor doesn’t get lost behind all the other ingredients, which means it actually makes a meaningful contribution to the flavor of the burger.

This new-ish bacon combined with Jack in the Box’s new beef patties that are seasoned while they cook make the BLT Cheeseburger a decent sandwich. Although, perhaps, the person who made my sandwich went a little overboard with the seasoning because it was awfully salty. The American cheese seems to be there just to keep the bacon from falling out of the burger, since it doesn’t provide much flavor. The pickles and tomatoes make up for the lame vegetation that is the chopped lettuce.

The Jack in the Box BLT Cheeseburger is a good burger, but it’s around only for a limited time. If you miss out, who knows when or if they’ll bring it back again. Although, if they don’t, you could just purchase a Jumbo Jack with Cheese and order it with bacon.

(Nutrition Facts – 649 calories, 326 calories from fat, 36 grams of fat, 15 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 100 milligrams of cholesterol, 1,658 milligrams of sodium, 520 milligrams of potassium, 42 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 5 grams of sugar, and 37 grams of protein.)

Item: Jack in the Box BLT Cheeseburger
Price: $4.99
Size: Small combo
Purchased at: Jack in the Box
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Good. Better bacon. Better beef patties. Lots of bacon. American cheese keeps the bacon from falling out. Part of a decently priced combo.
Cons: It’s pretty much a baconized Jumbo Jack with Cheese. Lettuce is pale and falls out easily. A bit too salty. Marrying bacon.

REVIEW: Jack in the Box Bacon Shake

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Jack in the Box Bacon Shake

Jack in the Box’s new Bacon Shake is damn intriguing, but it also sounds gross and I’m scared of it. I’m pretty sure I’m afraid of it because I haven’t gotten over that time I spent with my lips around a Jones Bacon Soda.

Oh dear, I just gagged. Will these emotional scars ever heal?

The Jack in the Box Bacon Shake isn’t like the Denny’s Maple Bacon Sundae we reviewed last year, which was topped with real chopped bacon. Instead, the Bacon Shake uses bacon-flavored Torani syrup, which is blended with vanilla ice cream.

To maximize the unusualness of the bacon shake, I hoped the suckable dessert was bacon colored, but as you can see in the picture on the right, the Jack in the Box Bacon Shake looks as harmless as a vanilla milkshake. It’s not even raw bacon pink.

The bacon-flavored shake also smells harmless. There’s a very slight hint of smokiness, but not enough to cause a bunch of red flags to pop up in your head. When I ordered my shake, I was asked if I wanted whipped cream and a cherry on top. I said yes and then asked if I could also get chopped bacon on top of that. The Jack in the Box employee laughed and then said “I’m sorry, no.” A part of me wanted to slam both hands on the counter and yell, “I’m not going to settle for that answer!”

I find it a little strange the shake didn’t come with bacon sprinkled on top of it. Every Jack in the Box restaurant has the means to fry up bacon and chop it up, so why not take that extra step and add a little texture to the shake? It would’ve made this bacon shake many times more fascinating.

Jack in the Box Bacon Shake Closeup

Many of you might be expecting me to say the Jack in the Box Bacon Shake is repulsive, but, surprisingly, it’s not. Although I have to admit it was slightly off-putting at first. But the more I ate, the more I enjoyed the bacon flavor of the shake, which wasn’t anything close to being overpowering. Instead it had a very mild smokiness, albeit an artificial smokiness. The weirdest thing about this shake (yes, weirder than the fact it’s bacon flavored) is the way it ends up tasting like coffee at the back end.

Overall, I wouldn’t call the Jack in the Box Bacon Shake “scrumptious,” but I also wouldn’t call it “revolting.” I think “pleasant” would be the best word I could use to describe it. If you’re REALLY into bacon, you should definitely give it a try. Would I buy another? I probably would. Although, if it came topped with chopped bacon, I’d change my answer to most definitely.

(Nutrition Facts – 16 ounces/regular size – 773 calories, 358 calories from fat, 40 grams of fat, 28 grams of saturated fat, 2 gram of trans fat, 127 milligrams of cholesterol, 319 milligrams of sodium, 691 milligrams of potassium, 89 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 75 grams of sugar, and 12 grams of protein.)

Item: Jack in the Box Bacon Shake
Price: $3.99
Size: Regular
Purchased at: Jack in the Box
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Not revolting. Pleasant flavor. Creamy. Tastes like coffee at the back end of the flavor. Bacon lovers will probably enjoy it.
Cons: Not sprinkled with chopped bacon. Might be gross to some people. There’s no signage for it in restaurants. Not bacon colored. The deep emotional scars from drinking a Jones Bacon Soda two years ago.

REVIEW: Whataburger Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup

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Whataburger Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup

Ketchup: America’s #1 condiment.

That’s how this review was supposed to start. However, being the Journalist with Integrity that I am, I decided to actually look up America’s #1 condiment, and was surprised to find that this is not true.

Hellman’s Mayonnaise: America’s #1 condiment.

Ketchup didn’t even come in second. Tostitos Salsa did. Different brands of mayonnaise took five of the ten top grossing condiments. Heinz Ketchup took third place.

What happened, America?

Your french fries are sad. Your burgers are bummed. Your hastily put-together vampire Halloween costume is lacking that crucial blood-down-the-chin tomato touch. What are you going to do, replace that with some mayonnaise?

…don’t do that. That is a bad idea. That is how you wind up on a list that mandates you must keep your porch lights off on Halloween.

So, what happened? Has the debate of ketchup vs. catsup divided a nation, allowing mayo to take over? I can put that to rest right now. Or, rather, five minutes of internet research can. Remember, kids: Wikipedia is a totally valid source for your essays.

The word “ketchup” entered the English vernacular in the late 17th century; I won’t go much deeper into that, but it involves China and fish sauce and you’ve probably already stopped reading this sentence.

You can blame Jonathan Swift for first introducing the word “catsup” in 1730. Heads up: Jonathan Swift wanted everyone to eat poor people’s babies. He probably wanted to put catsup on them, too.

Obviously, ketchup is the correct term. If you use the word catsup, you support eating babies. I’m pretty sure baby-eaters have to turn off their porch lights on Halloween.

Whataburger Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup Closeup

With etymology out of the way, what is to be done about ketchup’s decline in popularity? Well, Whataburger is doing their part to put some pep back in ketchup’s step with their new Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup. The label made me feel like I was about to peel open a tiny cup of bourbon, which I found adorable. I also like the phrase “Limited Batch”, which always makes me feel like I should save some to sell on eBay ten years from now for a price that will surely allow me to retire early and live on a giant yacht. I’m telling you, that bottle of Crystal Pepsi sitting in my closet will have me rolling in a pile of money like Scrooge McDuck.

I have to admit: ketchup is not my go-to condiment. I don’t hate it, I just think there are a lot more interesting dips and dressings out there. I’m not begging Whataburger to change my mind, but I am interested in seeing if they can take good ol’ ketchup and make it a little more dynamic.

Whataburger Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup with Regular Ketchup

Can you spot the Spicy? I was expecting the Spicy Limited Batch ketchup to have a different color and/or viscosity than Whataburger’s regular Fancy Ketchup, but they seemed almost identical on both fronts. There was a distinct difference in taste, however. Unlike regular ketchup, which generally has a sweet tomato taste with a vinegar finish, the Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup immediately hit with a tomato/vinegar combo and finished with a nice spicy bite (courtesy of red jalapeño pepper purée) and just a hint of that conventional ketchup sweetness.

Whataburger Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup on Fries

The heat level rose nicely as I plowed through the cup with my fries. I was surprised at how much heat there was; it wasn’t to the point where it burned my mouth, but it had more heat than most fast food places would qualify as “spicy”. Fast food spicy is usually disappointing.

While I’m not usually a big fan of ketchup, I found myself enjoying Whataburger’s Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup. All the classic ketchup flavors are there – tomato, sweetness and vinegar – but they’ve been rearranged to where the vinegar played a bigger part than the sugar. The addition of the spicy heat just added another dimension that worked with all the other flavors. Regular ketchup lovers may find the vinegar too overpowering and the sweetness too muted, but someone looking for a new ketchup experience with a spicy kick will wish this batch wasn’t so limited.

Now, where’s my tiny cup of bourbon?

(Nutrition Facts – 1 container – 31 calories, 2 calories from fat, 0 grams of fat, 406 milligrams of sodium, 7 grams of carbs, 1 gram of fiber, 5 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.)

Item: Whataburger Limited Batch Spicy Ketchup

Price: Free

Size: 1 ounce cup

Purchased at: Whataburger

Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Has a genuine spicy kick. Rollin’ like Scrooge McDuck. Vinegar over sweetness was refreshing. Catsup-covered babies
Cons: Could be too spicy for some. Mayo being the #1 condiment. Vinegar may overwhelm classic ketchup lovers. Not an actual cup of bourbon.

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